The Wrestling Sandwich 04.02.11

Hi, hello and welcome to the Wrestling Sandwich! I’m Steve Cook, joined as always by the massively popular Black Scorpion. Speaking of popularity, I’ve been popping up all over the website this week making special guest appearances. Check me out in Movies/TV Fact or Fiction, Wrestling Buy or Sell & MMA Fact or Fiction! I’m a one man Triple Threat.

This week we’re going to make some WrestleMania predictions, highlight a man who was a redneck before being a redneck was cool, showcase an Irish lass who made her wrestling return last weekend, and present a very special contest where the stakes couldn’t be higher. Enough jibba jabba, let’s dig into the Sandwich!

Steve Cook: It’s WrestleMania Weekend, the one weekend every year that kind of serves as a holiday for wrestling fans across the world. All eyes will be on Atlanta this Sunday night when World Wrestling Entertainment presents what will be their biggest show of 2011. The 411 Staff has convened for their Roundtable, and as always they did a fantastic job with it, but I thought we could go a little more in-depth and a little more off the wall with some predictions about the big show.

No, not the Big Show, though he is on the card as well. Scorp?

Black Scorpion: Considering that the WWE decided to market several matches as “the main event”, I will use every match they considered in that slot to be a main event for the official match results – so, that explains why you will see four separate ones. But Steve and I decided to do something more than just have the same old WrestleMania predictions with who wins what match. We’re going to share our predictions on what to expect, what not to expect, best match, worst match – we’re going Miss Cleo on this thing! So, on with the official and then we can get to the fun part.

Scorp’s Match Predictions:
1. MAIN EVENT #1: Undertaker vs. HHH – Undertaker wins.
2. MAIN EVENT #2: WWE Title: The Miz(c) vs. John Cena – John Cena wins
3. MAIN EVENT #3: World Title: Edge(c) vs. Alberto Del Rio – Alberto Del Rio wins
4. MAIN EVENT #4: Michael Cole vs. Jerry “The King” Lawler – Jerry Lawler wins
5. Trish Stratus/Snooki/John Morrison vs. Laycool/Dolph Ziggler – Trish/Snooki/Morrison win.
6. Corre (Wade Barrett, Justin Gabriel, Heath Slater, Ezekiel Jackson) vs. Big Show/Kane/Kozarella – Corre wins.
7. US Championship: Sheamus(c) vs. Daniel Bryan – Sheamus wins
8. CM Punk vs. Randy Orton – Randy Orton wins
9. Rey Mysterio vs. Cody Rhodes – Cody Rhodes wins

Steve’s Match Predictions:
1. MAIN EVENT #1: Undertaker vs. HHH – Gotta be the Dead Man.
2. MAIN EVENT #2: WWE Title: The Miz(c) vs. John Cena – Cena regains the title.
3. MAIN EVENT #3: World Title: Edge(c) vs. Alberto Del Rio – The Essence of Excellence is your new champion.
4. MAIN EVENT #4: Michael Cole vs. Jerry “The King” Lawler – The King reigns supreme.
5. Trish Stratus/Snooki/John Morrison vs. Laycool/Dolph Ziggler – I don’t see Team Snooki doing the job here.
6. Corre (Wade Barrett, Justin Gabriel, Heath Slater, Ezekiel Jackson) vs. Big Show/Kane/Kozarella – The merry band of good guys wins, Corre attacks afterwards.
7. US Championship: Sheamus(c) vs. Daniel Bryan – Bryan regains the CHAMPIONSHIP OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA.
8. CM Punk vs. Randy Orton – RKO
9. Rey Mysterio vs. Cody Rhodes – I’d love to see Cody win, but if I was a betting man I’d go with Rey.

Longest Match Prediction:
BS: Undertaker vs. HHH
SC: The Miz vs. John Cena

How Much Of Undertaker vs. Triple H Will Be Entrances:
BS: Five Minutes
SC: Eight Minutes

Shortest Match Prediction:
BS: Cole vs. Lawler
SC: Trish/Snooki/Morrison vs. Laycool/Ziggler

Number of Stunners to Expect:
BS: 3 (2 on Swagger, 1 on Cole)
SC: 2 (1 for Swagger, 1 for Cole)

Number of Wrestling Holds (not punches or kicks or chokes) Snooki Uses:
BS: 3
SC: 2

Worst Match of the Night:
BS: Trish/Snooki/Morrison vs. Laycool/Ziggler
SC: Trish Snooki/Morrison vs. Laycool/Ziggler

Best Match of the Night:
BS: Edge vs. Alberto Del Rio
SC: Rey Mysterio vs. Cody Rhodes

MVP Of WrestleMania:
BS: Alberto Del Rio
SC: Alberto Del Rio

Best Technical Wrestler On The Card:
BS: Daniel Bryan
SC: Daniel Bryan

Worst Technical Wrestler On The Card:
BS: Snooki
SC: Michael Cole

Chance Snooki Will Show Up Unable To Perform:
BS: 40%
SC: 75%

Chance a New Hall of Fame Member Will Interfere During The Night:
BS: 90%
SC: 100%

Chance Cena Gets Rock Bottomed:
BS: 100%
SC: 95%

Number of Weeks Cole Will Be Off To Sell The Match:
BS: 2
SC: 4

Worst Theme Song On The Card:
BS: Snooki (Jersey Shore theme)
SC: Jerry Lawler’s new theme

Best Theme Song On The Card:
BS: The Miz (I Came To Play)
SC: Undertaker (Ain’t No Grave)

Most Generic Theme Song On The Card:
BS: Daniel Bryan’s Ride of the Valkyries theme
SC: The Corre (End of Days)

Number of Tombstones HHH Will Kick Out Of:
BS: 2
SC: 1

Number of Pedigrees Undertaker Will Kick Out Of:
BS: 1
SC: 1

Chance America The Beautiful Gets Botched:
BS: 60%
SC: 10%

Individual Who Deserves Pain Relievers For Carrying The Entire Match:
BS: Trish Stratus
SC: Dolph Ziggler

Last Person To Stand Tall At The End Of The Show:
BS: The Rock
SC: John Cena

Feel free to share any and all WrestleMania predictions you have down in the comment section. Speak up now, and we’ll know that you made the right call when we watch the show on Sunday night! Otherwise, you’ll just say you did, and we won’t believe you.

Steve’s Smartest Thing of the Week: TNA Brings Back Christopher Daniels as Christopher Daniels

TNA fans were very excited at the end of Impact on Thursday night. One of TNA’s most well-regarded performers among Internet fans returned to the company in impressive fashion, and to those who hadn’t read the spoilers several weeks ago, it was a complete surprise. See, Christopher Daniels was just going to come back as Suicide, or maybe Curry Man. There was a deal with ROH where he had to wear a mask. Or something. The more I think about it, the more I wonder if we weren’t baited into believing something that wasn’t actually true. Maybe TNA or somebody put that story out there to throw us off the trail of the Fallen Angel making his glorious return to TNA.

Well, it’s either that or ROH is going to be really unhappy with TNA. But what else is new? I’m not sold on Daniels’ return being handled well in the weeks and months to come, but on one night TNA did it right.

Scorpion’s Dumbest Thing of the Week: WWE Smackdown, WrestleMania’s Go Home Show, Is A Promo Show

Right before the biggest PPV you have in your company, it might be advisable to recommend a show filled with the top talent either competing or at least appearing in some capacity in a different way from the last week. This is your final stop, the last chance for those people on the fringe of buying or not buying WrestleMania to take a look and make their decision. So what does WWE do? They are putting on a two match Smackdown with tons of promos and recaps from the last few weeks!

From a marketing perspective, it is a complete failure. Smackdown is known as the wrestling show for a reason – it is. The wrestling might not always be super, but they strive to keep long matches on the show. Instead of focusing on the talents of the wrestlers featured at WrestleMania they will show the same old clips, the same old promos, and basically everything you have already seen with the addition of new WWE Fan Axxess videos, a squash between Cody Rhodes vs Chris Masters, and a “main event” of Kofi Kingston vs Wade Barrett for the IC title. Expect video packages of Cole vs Lawler, HHH vs Undertaker, Edge vs Del Rio, Sheamus vs Bryan, Cena/Rock/Miz, and whatever else they throw together. This isn’t how you put together a wrestling show! All of those guys should APPEAR on Smackdown, taped or not, and do something to make people order the show.

The lickspittle followers of the WWE will never find fault with anything they do, although even the most ardent follower must admit they want to see something new other than Rhodes vs Masters yet again. What about Rock and Cena face to face after the assault from RAW, but with Miz “moderating” the discussion with a no physicality rule? Or, Sheamus and the Corre facing Daniel Bryan and Show/Kane/Kozarella? How about this blockbuster tag match: Undertaker teams with Edge vs HHH and Alberto Del Rio! UT and HHH could use all the in-ring time they can get considering they are expected to be 100% and nothing less on Sunday.

All in all, I see things like this and wonder why TNA is ragged on so much. Seriously, a 120-minute show that will feature maybe 15 minutes of a new match and the rest is old crap and some Axxess highlights? This is supposed to scream, “BUY OUR PPV, ISN’T IT AWESOME?” to the people on the fence? I think it will, but I think if anything this will hinder more buys than it will create.

Always Down On Dixie: Impact Zone Brawls
By Black Scorpion

One of the things I always remember people hate the most about TNA is the fact they have a lot of brawls that spill into the crowd and around the Impact zone in place of a match. The arguments are obvious, but let’s dissect them one by one:

Argument #1: This should be a match and not a brawl.

How many matches are basically brawls with a pin or submission at the end? In this case, we saw Sting and Mr. Anderson fight all over the Impact zone before ending up in the ring to lead up to the six man cage match later on. Why should Anderson and Sting wrestle each other if it isn’t for the title? This was a brawl, and the reason was to put over the animosity the two have for one another (although, it is mostly Anderson wanting Sting to just give him a title shot) because of the title situation. Sometimes, it makes more sense to give the fans what they want: A wild, rowdy, uncontrollable brawl that spills into the arena so all the fans live can see it, take pictures, and have a story to tell their friends when they come home. There have been some brawls around me when I attended live and to actually see it up close is a treat!

Argument #2: This will accomplish nothing.

Some of the best moments in wrestling began with brawls. Austin Stunning McMahon was just an attack out of nowhere, it wasn’t a match. How about the time the Nation beat down Faarooq and allowed The Rock to become the new leader and reinvent himself? Perhaps one of the most famous brawls was when Shawn Michaels beat down Marty Jannetty and threw him through the windshield of the Barber Shop – leading to the rise of a new main eventer many consider, myself included, the best in-ring performer ever. Sgt. Slaughter became a face when Iron Sheik tried to pass him down to the ring, and Slaughter refused to give the Iranian a free pass. They ended up coming to blows, and Slaughter became a huge face as a result, feuding with the Sheik and other anti-American characters. And hell, how did the nWo start? Brawls with WCW stars and threats! Brawls accomplish two specific purposes: 1. They usually set up an important match or character change, and 2. The brawls whet the appetite of the viewers and make them want to see these guys go at it in a stipulation match where nobody stops them at the last minute.

Argument #3: Why don’t they just wrestle?

The answer is simple: In many cases, brawls occur out of nowhere or were pre-planned beat downs. They aren’t matches, they serve as a way to begin feuds, matches, and change characters. Usually, we’re supposed to believe the wrestlers hate each other, right? So why would they lock up in a ring and follow rules? They get mad, beat the hell out of each other all over an arena, and when it comes match time they got some of it out of their system and now follow the rules to really make the other man hurt where it counts: The wallet. One famous brawl was when Terry Funk wanted a title shot from Ric Flair, and Flair refused. The result? An attack leading to a piledriver through a table, and then an I Quit match signed between the two that many regard as a five star classic. If they just wrestled there and then, would it be anywhere near as memorable?

Argument #4: Why do they always end the brawls too early if they are so good?

Sometimes, making the audience hungry for a product is the best marketing strategy to get them to pay for the events. For example, WWE IS doing the right thing by having Michael Cole always upstage Jerry Lawler week after week because at this point, people will happily pay to see Cole get destroyed at WrestleMania. As people begin fighting, having security rush in and block them off sets up the requirement to settle things “in the ring” and build to, usually, a match with more than usual fan interest.

The conclusion? When used properly and effectively, brawls can help improve the interest in a wrestling match between two people as well as completely change a wrestler’s gimmick. With the use of brawling, people get the feeling these people really want to take each other apart, and put more emotional investment in the match that follows. TNA has used brawling to help establish hatred in several feuds, most notably of late Angle vs Jarrett and Anderson vs Sting vs RVD, which is obviously going to be settled in a steel cage. And aren’t you more interested in seeing that now than before? I’m not saying TNA uses this method to the top effectiveness each time, but why hate them for trying to use a powerful feud and match builder?

SC: I think the point that Scorp might be missing is that people aren’t complaining about TNA having brawls…they’re complaining about TNA having a lot of brawls. If you have people fighting all over the Impact Zone all the time, that takes away the impact (pun kind of intended) of having them. When I go to ROH shows in Dayton, they usually have one match that goes into the crowd and messes stuff up. It’s pretty predictable once you go to enough shows, but it always gets a good reaction from the people that can actually see what’s going on. If they had people fighting in the crowd every match, it’d get old really quick and people would be more annoyed by having to move out of the way all the time than interested in the action.

That being said, I don’t think TNA has an excessive amount of brawling these days. An excessive amount of talking would be a more accurate description of their television show.

By Steve Cook

Rebecca Knox returned to the world of professional wrestling last weekend at SHIMMER events in Berwyn, Illinois. Back in 2006, the nineteen year old Knox was the hottest up and coming lady in wrestling, with wrestling skills that surpassed her years of experience and a personality that made her a pretty convincing biatch. 411 was one of the hubs of the K-Nox Revolution, and we all expected her to dominate the world of womens’ wrestling for years to come.

Unfortunately, Knox suffered a head injury in September 2006 and retired from wrestling. She teased a return in 2008, but decided not to go through with it. She was completely off the wrestling radar until last weekend, and now people like me are very excited and hoping for some more K-Nox in our lives.

Top 10 Moves:

Promo:

Yeah, she’s got a pretty interesting voice. She is from Ireland, so you’ll have that.

And yes, the picture above is of her…one of my readers suggested it might be one of the Bella Twins, but she’s had that on her MySpace page since the mid-2000s.

Old School Wrestler Of The Week: “Dr. D” David Schultz
By Black Scorpion

Tonight, we discuss a foul-mouth bad-tempered alcoholic redneck that had no regard for authority, was a former successful tag team wrestler who became big after going into singles wrestling, and was known for assaulting people outside the ring. No, I’m not talking about “Stone Cold” Steve Austin, but instead the man who was Stone Cold before Stone Cold started wrestling, “Dr. D” David Schultz.

A native of Madison County Tennessee, Schultz began his career in NWA’s Mid-America region as part of a tag team with Roger Kirby. Schultz would later also tag with Dennis Condrey to gain the NWA Southeast Tag Team Titles in 1979. In Canada, he worked for Stu Hart in Stampede Wrestling where he teamed with none other than Wayne Ferris, aka The Honky Tonk Man. In 1984, Schultz was hired by Vince McMahon, who also allowed Schultz’s tag team partner to enter the company: “Macho Man” Randy Savage!

Schultz wasn’t able to claim a long run in the WWF, but he did make headlines with his trash-talk, roughhousing tactics, and basically a devil-may-care attitude towards his opponents in the ring. Schultz was highlighted on the debut edition of Tuesday Night Titans and shown “at home” with his wife and children where he basically screamed at all of them and vowed to beat everybody up in the WWF. He even took jabs at Hulk Hogan at the end of his match that was shown, indicating he wanted the gold. Like Austin, Schultz had blond hair and wore black, utilizing moves such as the piledriver to his advantage inside the ring. His finisher, the second rope elbow drop, would put away several of the lesser-known talents McMahon put in his path.

Schultz “At Home” from the first TNT:

Schultz Badmouths Rocky Johnson And Tony Atlas:

During a segment in “Bloopers, Bleeps, And Bodyslams” Schultz showed his Austin-like tendencies. At the wedding reception of Mad Dog Vachon, Schultz was simply drinking and lying back with his boots on a chair and swearing to McMahon and Lord Alfred Hayes when they talked to him. When the wife refused to eat a piece of wedding cake, Schultz walked to the head table and demanded she eat it. She claimed she didn’t like cake, and he simply shoved it in her face, which brought about a giant food fight. Schultz’s bad behavior, however, would get him in deep trouble when he would encounter John Stossel in the infamous 1984 incident at Madison Square Garden.

Schultz Smacks Stossel!

Stossel, naturally, believed wrestling was a fake sport. This enraged Schultz, who slapped him repeatedly and yelled out, “What’s that, is that fake? Huh? What the hell’s wrong with you? That’s an open hand slap. You think its fake? I’ll fake you!” Stossel suffered injuries from the attack and ended up suing the WWF, taking home a sweet $425,000 settlement after realizing he had permanent eardrum damage as a result. Schultz, during that period, had also allegedly challenged Mr. T to a legit fight backstage, because he didn’t believe Mr. T was legitimately tough.

McMahon blackballed Schultz all around the country after firing him, which led to Schultz leaving the business to persue a career as the world’s #1 ranked professional bounty hunter and bail bonds business owner. He has captured over 1,700 fugitives, worked with the FBI, and even gone to Egypt and Puerto Rico to apprehend his suspects. At 6’6 and 270 lbs, it is no wonder he had such a good transition! Schultz also got in a last laugh at Vince McMahon by testifying against him during the steroid trials in the 1990’s, the trials that helped kill the legitimacy of professional wrestling when to save a lousy buck McMahon admitted the product was pre-determined so that athletic commissions had no jurisdiction over his product. Although he was retired, he did make a brief comeback match in 2009 prior to his shoot interview with RF Video, where he speaks candidly on everything about his career including his claim Vince told him to smack Stossel.

Dr. D resides in Connecticut, the same state housing the WWE corporate offices, and remains as outspoken and controversial as ever. Recognized as one of the most dangerous men in the world and a legendary fighter, Schultz was able to be very successful despite the evil “blackball” tactic used against him that pretty much ended his career in wrestling. Ironically, the same man who wanted Schultz to defend wrestling now has a campaign to insist it is now “sports entertainment” and admits the matches are determined in advance. Despite being 55 years old, Schultz still is a bounty hunter and one wonders what would happen if McMahon ever decided to make amends and face Schultz in the ring – A match I am sure many old school fans would dish out money to see: After all, Vince took on Bret Hart and if that match actually happened anything can! So kudos to “Dr. D” for still being recognized as a master of his craft despite McMahon’s revisionist history and even keeping him out of the WWE Encyclopedia, and hopefully Schultz will someday get the recognition he deserves from the WWE.

Schultz Discusses Hulk Hogan:

The Take 5 highlights five performers to keep an eye on in the coming weeks and months. This was Scorpion’s idea, and he suggested dividing it into the following categories:

We’ve decided to split up the workload to give the column a lower calorie count. We’ll each do a Wrestler of the Week every week, and split the other four categories. This week Scorp is doing Woman & Authority Figure while I am honoring a Tag Team & a Commentator.

Scorpion’s Wrestler to Watch: Ken Anderson…..Anderson

Impact last week featured Mr. Anderson kicking the show off with a little math lesson for Hogan’s Immortal regime, with the assistance of a perverted professor. After proving his point about earning a title shot, he nailed the professor with a Mic Drop for lying about his sexual orientation, and then got right in Hogan’s face when he came out. Anderson then faced RVD in the main event, viciously beating him around the ring and hitting a Mic Drop against the ring post, and fighting with special guest referee Sting. This week, Anderson couldn’t even be restrained and attacked Sting and Immortal throughout the broadcast, even at one point letting Sting and RVD sit in the ring and fight off three guys unsuccessfully because Anderson was attacked by Sting and RVD didn’t help him. Anderson will hit anything moving around him and TNA fans love it, as Anderson strives for the belt he never should have lost. I think the best is still yet to come for the former world champion in TNA…..TNA!

Steve’s Wrestler to Watch: Cody Rhodes

This is the moment us Dashing Cody fans have been waiting for. WrestleMania is on Sunday night. Our man has a date with Rey Mysterio, considered by most to be one of the very top wrestlers in WWE. Let’s face it, Rey’s WM record is a little spotty, but he’s still one of the best guys in WWE to work with if you’re looking to have a great match. The story has been told, and it’s been a great ride. Cody has become more sinister, more demented with every passing week since Rey Mysterio broke his nose and ruined his facial features for the rest of his life. He has proven that he is one of WWE’s rising stars ever since moving to Smackdown, and it might not be a matter of “if”, but “when” he gets that push to the next level and truly becomes world championship material.

Cody can make himself one of the top stars in WWE with an outstanding showing here. It’s not completely up to him…it was just last year that everybody was expecting Rey Mysterio vs. CM Punk to be the match of the show (other than Taker vs. Shawn), and it got cut to seven minutes and didn’t live up to expectations. The same thing could happen here. I am hoping for a breakthrough performance from Cody on Sunday night, and frankly it’s one of the biggest reasons I’ll be watching the show.

Steve’s Tag Team to Watch: Charlie Haas & Shelton Benjamin

Wrestling’s Greatest Tag Team is involved in two potential classic matches this weekend on ROH’s shows in Atlanta, Georgia. On Friday night after this column’s deadline they took on the Kings of Wrestling for the ROH Tag Team Championships. Whether they win them or not, they’ll be taking on the American Wolves on Saturday night in a match that ROH fans have been waiting for since Haas & Benjamin came to ROH. Davey Richards teamed with Hass & Benjamin in Dayton, Ohio to take on the Kings of Wrestling & Roderick Strong, so this should be a battle of two great tag teams with a tremendous amount of respect for each other. Richards & ROH World Champion Eddie Edwards are at least equally beloved by ROH fans as Hass & Benjamin are, and I have no idea who the crowd will be rooting for. It’s the type of matchup that ROH has been built on for a large portion of its existence. The relationship between Hass & Benjamin and the team of Chris Hero & Claudio Castagnoli isn’t nearly as good, so that will be more of a showcase of hate and the fans will be solidly behind Haas & Benjamin. You’d have to go back a long time to find a weekend where these two men were involved in bigger matches.

Scorpion’s Female Wrestler To Watch: Winter

When Winter debuted, I’d thought of a few possibilities she was supposed to be: Vampire, ghost of some sort, or just a lunatic. But it appears with the spell she’s cast over Angelina Love, she’s either a witch or able to influence people to do as she commands. Some will bash the idea, but just a few months ago a female candidate for the US Senate lost an election because of false claims she was a witch. Not only is the idea interesting, but also it beats WWE’s generic “blonde, smiling babyface” character. Winter has personality; some good moves, is definitely smoking hot and has a chance to prove her skill with a company that actually got behind her from the get-go.

SC: That is not why Christine O’Donnell lost that election. Good God.

Scorpion’s Authority Figure To Watch: Vince McMahon.

Although McMahon hasn’t been on TV recently outside of his big WrestleMania guest host announcement, that in itself bodes trouble for the WWE as McMahon only appears when something big is going to occur. After bringing back the Rock, what bombshell will McMahon drop next, possibly as soon as Monday night after WrestleMania to keep the momentum going? It has been a bit too long without McMahon regularly on WWE TV, and I have a feeling that’s going to change very soon. After all, if the RAW GM gets too drunk with power, we all know Vince is the one guy who can teach him a few lessons about how to manage a Corporation.

Steve’s Commentator To Watch: Josh Mathews

Josh’s career has skyrocketed over the past few months. He had languished on ECW & NXT for quite some time, and was used as an interviewer on Raw & Smackdown. A good amount of fans have supported Mathews as the best play by play announcer in WWE for quite some time, but he never had the chance to show it on Raw & Smackdown until December 2010. Josh got Todd Grisham’s slot on Smackdown, and was impressive enough to earn a regular slot on Raw not long afterwards. Sometimes guys stick around in a company for a long time without getting a chance, and once they do, they deliver. That’s what Josh has done, and I think he’ll continue to do so for a very long time. It’ll be interesting to see what happens to WWE’s announcing rotation after WrestleMania, especially if Michael Cole is out of the picture for a period of time like I think he may be. Josh will be the main voice of either Smackdown or Raw, or maybe both like he currently is.

Haterade: Hater’s Gotta Hate, Here We Set ‘Em Straight!

Scorpion has requested time at the end of each column to address the people that hate on him. Since people usually love me I’ve never had to resort to such things, but I have a feeling that I’ll get a kick out of this. I’ll insert my thoughts when necessary.

Ah, the vitriol that makes my week. Seriously, when you take the time out of your schedule to insult me I take it as a compliment, considering I caused a reaction of some sort. Here are this week’s entries:

“wow, as if last week could not get any worse…just no reason for this, other than scorpion clearly trying to troll everyone with all the tna shit. is this experiment over with yet?

Posted By: perez (Guest) on March 23, 2011 at 01:47 AM”

Troll with TNA material? No, I’m trying to actually take apart all the vicious rumors and lies and show TNA for what it really is, if you are willing to open your mind and admit the possibility of being wrong. And no, the experiment continues, much like your attempt to get laid consensually.

“like the one your mother made when she decided you would be born and not become a facial. The fact that millions of sperm had to die to facilitate your birth is truly an event to mourn.”

“said it last week and will again, cook-youre better than this. dont become a ‘troll inducing columnist’ here man…sadly, as long as black tna scorpion stays on, u will be a joke.

Posted By: Guest#8474 (Guest) on March 24, 2011 at 03:08 AM”

Black TNA Scorpion? Come on now. I’m simply advocating competition – businesses are better when they have to compete against each other and provide the best product possible. Yes, TNA is not YET able to compete with WWE head to head, but we can at least hope for more than the McMonopoly we have on “sports entertainment” now. Cook isn’t a joke, but your education? Did you actually graduate?? Public schooling is truly the real troll on all of us taxpayers.

“Gotta be honest,
this column is a chore to get through. 85 different segments and photos and obnoxious commentary, it’s just bombardment and total overkill. Trim the fat a little, boys. Maybe every segment doesn’t have to happen every week. If at all. In fact, this was probably enough for me as far as this column goes. See ya in the Ask 411 section.

Posted By: Guest#1400 (Guest) on March 24, 2011 at 12:47 PM”

So, you don’t like the column, but you added ways to improve the column and then said you won’t see it anymore even if we implemented the changes? Good to know so many open-minded folk visit our wrestling section. That’s the thing, really: Nobody wants to admit if they are wrong. Even here, we have a clear example of a person who won’t even give something a second chance but feels compelled to shit all over the product anyway. We are always seeking feedback, and some of your concerns are being addressed. It would be nice, however, if you came back in a couple weeks and gave it a second chance before writing it off entirely.

And that’s it for the hate this week, I’m sure next week will provide more wonderful polymaths posting their mendacious codswallop all over the comments section. I look forward to it, my friends.

SC: Well folks, that’s all we have time for this week! Make sure to join me for the Rs on Monday & News From Cook’s Corner on Tuesday…we’re going to close the column this week with a slightly different take on the “Hot Girl on Girl Action”. See, I wanted to junk that section of the column since we’re on Saturdays now and DeMarco already does that gimmick very well. On Friday I came up with a little twist. A promo war has developed in Dragon Gate USA between two girls that…well, let’s face it, they don’t really fit the prototype of what a DGUSA talent is. I am not complaining, in fact I love the idea of these two hooking up in some fashion.

I ask you, the reader, who cuts the better promo and who seems to have more potential in the world of wrestling based on whatever reasoning you like. It can be the promo, their looks, whatever. The winner will receive a prize that will be revealed in Tuesday’s edition of News From Cook’s Corner.

Trina Michaels:

Reby Sky: