Wrestling’s 4R’s 4.25.11: Impact, Superstars & Smackdown Reviewed!

In HD where available…

By: Jeremy Thomas

iMpact! 04.21.11:

QUICK RESULTS:
Beer Money def. Murphy & Rob Terry [* ¾]
Sarita & Rosita def. Madison Rayne and Tara [¾ *]
Abyss def. Rob Van Dam [* ½]
Sting def. Matt Hardy [** ½]

AJ’s REVENGE: Impact began with a very nice video package highlighting Lockdown. I don’t often give the TNA production team credit for their videos, and that’s because a lot of the time they just don’t hold water to WWE’s. However, I enjoyed this one and I thought it covered the three big matches nicely. Then we went into the Impact Zone and say AJ Styles being lowered into a caged ring. AJ cut a decent promo about his return at Lockdown and how he came back to take Bully Ray out and that he was going to do it again tonight. Of course that brought Ray out for a good promo about how he wasn’t going to “take it easy” on AJ this time around. Bully of course refused to get into the cage—thus playing on his bully gimmick, obviously—but Daniels was there to force him into it. I thought that they had a decent little brawl here and AJ came out on top. This was a nice way for them to get this feud re-kicked off and it opened the show really hot. Can’t argue with that.

MURPHY & ROB TERRY vs. BEER MONEY: So is it just me, or is it more than a little bit of a disappointment to hear Immortal’s music and then see Rob Terry and Murphy coming out? Terry cut a promo that wasn’t as bad as I anticipated; it wasn’t great and it didn’t flow right, but it worked just fine for what they needed. Roode’s promo worked just fine to boot and we had a tag team title match. I’m always happy to see the belts defended on television as I think it helps the credibility of the titles when they are defended more consistently. We had a decent match here that let Beer Money get the win to pop the crowd, but it didn’t bury Murphy and Terry either. That was a legit concern considering the angle that lead to this match involved Hogan being “disappointed” with Terry and Murphy. This was as good as I expected a four minute match to be; Terry didn’t look terrible, Murphy was fine and the champs were good as ever.

HOGAN ISN’T HAPPY, RVD IS SMARKY: Midway into the first hour Hogan came down to the ring with the pipe he tried to give RVD at Lockdown. He called out RVD and started off weak. A few fries short of a Happy Meal? That was a momentary trip, but then RVD took over and talked about the days before Hogan was a heel. Yay, kayfabe-breaking “insider” terms. RVD’s whole promo was playing to the smarks although, to be honest, the rest of it played better than the opening line. Once they got into the back-and-forth it played all right with RVD being the fan voice while Hogan represented everything that fans hate about TNA. Then Sting came out and backed RVD up, giving him the World Title match. Sting gave RVD the World Title match at Lockdown and in retaliation Hogan booked RVD against Abyss and Sting against Matt Hardy. I had some issues with the way this started off but it accomplished what it needed to just fine and set up the rest of the show as well as the next PPV main event. Works for me.

STING vs. MATT HARDY: We had a couple decent promos from Sting and Hardy, short and sweet, talking about the match and Jeff Hardy. I thought that Matt’s promo worked well in his vengeance-obsessed, chip-on-his-shoulder way and Sting’s sarcastic “Oh no, I’m being made to wrestle” promo was fun. Immortal was waiting for Sting but Fourtune cleared the way and we got the match. These guys got a good ten minutes or so and it actually made Matt look pretty good. Sure, he got off to a cheap shot beginning but he looked competitive against Sting and this was probably the most credibility that he’s had since he left WWE. The psychology and the story of the match were solid; the work rate wasn’t perhaps the best we could have possibly seen but it was perfectly passable. The TNA World Title got defended, Sting picked up the win, Matt looked good and Anderson stood tall at the end.

ABYSS vs. ROB VAM DAM: This was RVD’s punishment for rejecting Immortal. RVD and Abyss of course have their history and I was looking forward to this. It was typical Impact wrestling length but I don’t mind quite so much in RVD matches because he can make an entertaining spotfest in four minutes. Hogan played into this match heavily on the outside, which was fine as it means Van Dam doesn’t lose any credibility by the loss. This was the match where Abyss got his teeth knocked out and you have to give him a ton of credit for toughing it out. I’m actually grading this down because of Van Dam; listen, accidents happen, no doubt. But when you’ve bloodied someone up by a kick, I think you should change the flow of the match a touch and NOT kick him in the face a second time, this time off the ropes. Crimson came out and took out Abyss, assumedly for the Abyss/Crimson feud. This worked well for what it was; I was a little disappointed to see RVD continue to put his opponent at risk after the opening mistake but that doesn’t kill the match.

VELVET/ANGELINA/WINTER WACKINESS: Yes, we knew that this was going to continue. It continued this week with a good promo by Velvet before Winter came in and Velvet accused her of drugging Angelina. No, really? Angelina them came in and beat the snot out of her, looking more like a zombie than ever. I don’t like the feud, but this was short and sweet so it gets a pass.

SARITA & ROSITA vs. MADISON RAYNE & TARA: This match was more to continue the split between Madison and Tara than be an actual match, although it was again nice to see the Knockout Tag Titles be on the line. We had a segment before the match where Madison went off on Tara for…um, for doing what Madison asked her to do. I actually kind of like Madison’s unreasonable persona, it works in that classic heel “I’m right, even if I’m wrong” way and the way she no-sells logic is fun. The match itself…well, it wasn’t much of a match. Don’t get me wrong, I’m certainly not disappointed to see Sarita and Rosita come out, but Anarquia’s tiny promo was about a fourth the length of the entire match. It didn’t help that it was joined in progress. What tiny amount that we got was pretty decent, but was super-short and having Madison get beaten with a freaking clothesline was sort of embarrassing. The plot development wasn’t enough to keep this out of the wRong because even that seemed to be a holding pattern.

SCOTT STEINER SIDETRACKS THE BLUEPRINT: Hey look, Matt Morgan’s moving onto another random placeholder feud. This started off with Morgan coming out and demanding that his time was now and that he was going to take what was his. Basically, it was the same promo that he keeps giving before someone comes out and sidelines him so he can stay in his holding pattern. This time it was Scott, who is apparently turning heel for no apparent reason other than “shit, we need someone to feud with Morgan.” Steiner said that if he had Morgan’s genetics that he would kill himself, then hang himself. Um, okay. Also, Morgan is apparently disrespectful of Scott because he wants a world title shot first. Yes, because Steiner’s done anything to deserve a title shot in the last several years. Morgan gave a good, solid promo respecting Steiner but he was working an uphill battle against the nonsensical heel turn and Steiner’s nonsensical promo. Yeah, I’m not looking forward to this feud nor do I think that the booking of it makes any sense.

QUEEN OF THE MOUNTAIN: So of course, since Jarrett won at Lockdown, we had to be subjected to more of these silly vignettes. The one that started us off on this plot development involved Jarrett and Karen taking a carriage ride outside the Impact Zone. You know, I could think of more romantic places to have carriage rides. Karen was getting crowd Queen of the Mountain. This was actually far less annoying than the Second Wedding planning scenes or the Jarrett Home Tour ones, so I’ll give it credit for that. Angle then went looking around and ran into Eric Young who said to calm down he hung out with his horses Mongo and Sid which resulted in some toilet humor involving beans. Which, by the way, wasn’t funny.

The ceremony itself kicked off the second hour and they had a throne and all. Jarrett cut a promo to piss off the fans and go over-the-top with the Karen praise, which worked well. Karen got her coronation and played it well…until Karen got covered in shit Carrie-style. Yeah, I think we all knew that this was coming and frankly, it wasn’t funny; it was just gross. I’ll give Jarrett’s grossed-out reaction some credit, but otherwise it was just lame. I didn’t like it when Big Show was coated in shit and I didn’t like this. Obviously, this angle MUST continue and Angle referred to his “Mistress” who would be coming in to take out Karen. The whole thing just…well, I could use a “stunk” pun, but let’s be honest, it blew.

By: Tony Acero

Superstars 4.21.11:

QUICK RESULTS
– Tyler Reks Defeated JTG [*1/2]
– Maryse Defeated Natalya [**]
– Mark Henry Defeated Ted DiBiase [**]

GOODBYE EDGE: Edge has always been that guy that I know I liked, I just never paid much attention to because there was always someone “better” in my eyes. He was part of my favorite little era of Smackdown in the Smackdown Six and I can’t say I remember him ever having a bad match, but he was always under the radar. I loved the man as a heel, thought he was a boring face, but he always entertained. I feel bad for not appreciating him perhaps as much as I should have in my years as a fan. I always harp on video packages on Superstars and NXT but I feel this one was warranted and enjoyed. Thank you, Edge.

TYLER REKS vs. JTG: I’m sorry, but I just don’t care… The announcers continue to over exaggerate in their commentary and try to one up each other with adjectives. It didn’t help this match in particular when they call Tyler Reks “a dominant force on Superstars” when he’s lost to Chris Masters three times in a row, now. JTG has lost his luster long ago and this match didn’t do anything to change it. I feel kind of bad, but at the same time the writers have not given any of us fans a reason to care about these guys. JTG is stuck with a heel on NXT yet continually trying to FACE it up and it doesn’t fly. I feel bad for JTG because it’s obvious he has talent and even though it’s cheesy, he lives his gimmick. Reks, on the other hand, has done nothing of note since he’s come back after being repackaged.

MARYSE vs. NATALYA: Well, Maryse winning was a shock but other than that, this match was pretty lackluster. I really enjoy Maryse’s constant adherence to her character. She’s such a complete bitch and it’s awesome. I don’t know why Natalya lost, really but it’s Superstars so it might not lead to anything…

DIBIASE vs. MARK HENRY: A lot of stalling in the beginning before DiBiase slaps Henry and gets the action going. The match was so-so and ended abruptly. Ted did what he needed to do in pissing off the fans and Henry did what he needed to do in appeasing them, but that’s really the extent of the match. I do have to give props to Henry for doing great in selling Ted’s offense. It shows his veteran wits and I applaud him for it.

NOTHING

NOTHING

By: Steve Cook

WWE SmackDown 04.22.11

QUICK RESULTS:
Rey Mysterio d. Cody Rhodes (**½)
Jack Swagger d. Trent Barreta (SQUASH)
Big Show & Kane d. Heath Slater & Justin Gabriel (**)
Drew McIntyre d. Chris Masters (**)
Wade Barrett d. Kofi Kingston (**)

REY GETS REVENGE, THEN GETS BAGGED: The London fans were treated to a WrestleMania re-match, as Cody Rhodes battled Rey Mysterio. Prior to the match, Cody spoke of how he wore a mask for protection, but Rey Mysterio & everybody else wear masks because they’re ashamed of themselves and everybody around them. He presented the ringsiders with some paper bags they could wear over their heads to cover their lying eyes & blackheads. Well, I guess it’s been long enough since the Beautiful People had their whole bag thing going. It was a little tough to rate the match since there were two commercial breaks, but what was there was pretty solid. Rey got his win back, but Cody attacked him after the bell to set up their falls-count-anywhere match at Extreme Rules. Can’t wait! Seems the fans at ringside like them some Cody, as they gladly wore the paper bags and chanted “Paper Bag” when Cody placed the bag on Rey’s head. Smart folks.

I kind of picked up on a Mankind type of vibe from Cody this week with his delivery. That’s not a bad thing, and at least he’s not dressed like a turd.

THE KANE SHOW vs. SLABRIEL: Big Show told Kane several weeks back that they could dominate if they re-formed their tag team, and sure enough they are dominating. Good match here, and it helped continue the dissention in the Corre. Actually, I think the Corre’s past the point of dissention with Slater & Gabriel turning on each other backstage. If those two guys are on the outs, the rest of the group just might be hopeless.

DREW MAC vs. THE MASTERPIECE: This wasn’t quite as fun as their shorter match a couple of months back, but we still got Masters selling the hell out of the Future Shock. The announcers keep hinting at bigger things ahead for McIntyre, so hopefully they’re on to something. It was funny to hear the dubbed-in boos to cover the baby face reaction that Drew got from the British fans.

ALBERTO’S RETIREMENT PARTY FOR EDGE: Alberto Del Rio threw an excellent retirement party for his fallen rival, Edge. He presented him with a Grandfather clock & Depends, brought out Lita (she looked a little bit heavier than the last time I saw her, but what the heck), and had Ricardo Rodriguez ride down to the ring on a Rascal to the KERWIN WHITE THEME! Amazing stuff. Then Edge came out & ran down Del Rio, and Christian had to save him from big Brodus Clay. I’m not really digging Edge as a damsel-in-distress type, so hopefully they don’t plan on doing this too often. I kind of liked the music they played in the background of Alberto’s promo…it was a little bit over the top, but in a good way. Kind of like Kane’s music he had in the background of his promos for awhile, but Alberto’s exudes class.

JACK SWAGGER vs. TRENT BARRETA: This almost went in the Wrong section because I had to watch part of the Sir Michael Cole nonsense again. Once on Monday was more than enough. On the bright side, Swagger has been rebuilt pretty well in the process. It’ll be interesting to see what he does after his big tag team match with all the announcers.

WADE BARRETT vs. KOFI KINGSTON: This was going along pretty well for the first six minutes or so, up until the ending, which looked really weak. Dude, if you’re going to use the ropes to win, you gotta grab those ropes like there’s no tomorrow! Don’t half-ass it, it makes your opponent look silly & ineffectual. I liked how Wade sent Big Zeke away and still managed to win on his own, which seems to be another sign that the members of the Corre might be better off without each other.

COUPLE’S THERAPY COMES TO AN END: I got no problem with LayCool splitting up, but to do it in a psychiatrist’s office instead of in front of a live crowd…eh, it didn’t really do much for me. I think turns are better when they’re done in front of an audience, so you get the aghast reaction of the fans that helps the person doing the turn get over as a vile human being. Doing it in front of a psychiatrist doesn’t have the same effect.

BIG SHOW AT THE KID’S CHOICE AWARDS: Why was Big Show at a monster truck event and not driving the truck? Just like Michelle from Tough Enough has been wrestling for eleven years, Big Show has been driving monster trucks for sixteen years! You’d think Nickelodeon would take advantage of Show’s talents.

Until Friday, keep on kickin’ it!

…and remember to stay grounded!