The 411 Wrestling Top 5 3.21.12: Week 166 – Top 5 Worst WrestleMania Main Event Matches

TOP 5 WORST WRESTLEMANIA MAIN EVENT MATCHES

For the purposes of the column, main event = last match on the card. This is here in big red text, although many of you will totally ignore it. Have a good day.

Nick Bazar
5. WWE Championship: Triple H (c) vs. Randy Orton (Wrestlemania XXV) – The build-up was great, but the match was horrible. Triple H and Randy Orton have never had very good chemistry, and it’s just a shame that their worst match together would take place at a Wrestlemania main event. It never felt like they were on the same page, nothing gelled, the crowd was out of it and the ending was disappointingly anti-climactic. It also showed just how one-sided their feud has been since 2004.

4. Lawrence Taylor vs. Bam Bam Bigelow (Wrestlemania XI) – Let’s say Shaq was booked to wrestle Big Show at Wrestlemania this year. Now, let’s say they scheduled that match as the main event of the show (wow, could you imagine the 411 comment board?). That would be comparable to Lawrence Taylor vs. Bam Bam Bigelow at Wrestlemania XI. I give both guys credit for trying, especially Bigelow, but their match just wasn’t a Wrestlemania main event. I don’t care about the media hype around the match- it would have gotten the attention regardless of its spot on the card. It’s stuff like this that justifies Shawn Michaels’ grievances around this time.

3. WWE Championship: The Miz (c) vs. John Cena (Wrestlemania XXVII) – This was bad on almost all levels. First off, the build-up put The Miz (the WWE Champion at the time mind you) on the backburner- they made him a total non-factor. Worse than that, they didn’t even make the match about wanting to win the WWE Championship, which is supposedly the thing everyone in the company strives for. Even worse than that, the original ending to the match was a Double-Countout! Talk about letting the air out of that stadium; not that there was much air left once the match got underway.

2. WWF Championship: Sycho Sid (c) vs. The Undertaker (Wrestlemania XIII) – One word I’d use to describe this match: Boring. It didn’t feel like a Wrestlemania main event, and there wasn’t any buzz or excitement around it. Sid and Taker lumbered around with sluggish and rudimentary offense for over 20 minutes; unfortunately, I don’t think this match could have held people’s attention for 10 minutes. Honestly, the most intriguing guy in this whole situation was sitting at the commentary booth with a knee injury.

1. WWF Championship: Yokozuna (c) vs. Hulk Hogan (Wrestlemania IX) – We are defining “Main Event” as the last match on the card so technically, Yokozuna vs. Hulk Hogan was the main event of Wrestlemania IX. While the other wrestling matches on my list were bad, at least the competitors in them…you know, wrestled. This wasn’t that. This was a 30 second squash designed to give Hogan another WWF Championship. It gets worse though, because Hogan wasn’t feeling Vince McMahon’s original plan of him eventually dropping the title to Bret Hart, so in a few short months, we were right back to square one with Yoko as champion.

Gavin Napier
HM: Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Lawrence Taylor (Wrestlemania 11 – At least this one wasn’t actually SUPPOSED to be good.
HM: Hulk Hogan (c) vs. King Kong Bundy (Wrestlemania 2) – Who knew the “big blue” cage’s debut would only last 10 minutes?
HM: The Miz (c) vs. John Cena (Wrestlemania XXVII) – Not as big of a letdown as Triple H vs. Randy Orton..but they sure tried.

5. Triple H (c) (with Stephanie McMahon) vs. Mick Foley (with Linda McMahon) vs. The Rock (with Vince McMahon) vs. The Big Show (with Shane McMahon) (Wrestlemania 2000) – Just look at all those damned parentheses. Welcome to the new millennium. To celebrate, how about we book a match that features every available McMahon family member? This match was bad enough that it would be referenced in Mick Foley’s feud with Edge, as something that Foley was actually embarrassed of. This overbooked mess included a ring bell, a barbed wire 2×4, multiple chairs, multiple tables, ring steps, Pat Patterson, Gerald Brisco, a heel turn from Vince McMahon, and The Rock assaulting 3/4 of the McMahon family afterwards. This drug on for nearly 40 minutes with questionable booking throughout. Just awful.

4. Triple H (c) vs. Randy Orton (Wrestlemania XXV) – For all the heat he catches on the internet, Triple H has been a reliable performer in big spots. Even in my #5 match, the actual wrestling was good, just overbooked. And for all the love he gets among the critics these days, Randy Orton has been reliably bland. At Wrestlemania XXV, nobody won, including the fans. After what was, admittedly, a great build to the match, Triple H and Randy Orton laid an egg and capped off the 25th ‘Mania with a whimper instead of a bang. The match fell completely flat and was utterly forgettable.

3. Sid Vicious (c) vs. The Undertaker (Wrestlemania XIII) – I always hated the “Sycho” moniker they gave Sid. I hated the intentional misspelling, I hated how they dropped the name Vicious, and I just refused to call him that. Ever. Still do. Now, remember a couple of weeks ago when I put Undertaker on the list of worst Wrestlemania performers and people went nuclear in the comments? Don’t look now, but he just made another “worst of” list. This match was bad, featured unnecessary Bret Hart interference, and is one of the parts of “the streak” that nobody will remember fondly. Oh wait, that was like the first 14 matches.

2. Sgt. Slaughter (c) vs. Hulk Hogan (Wrestlemania VII) – When a match is so bad it forces a change of venue before it even happens, you’ve accomplished something. I was 11 years old when Slaughter won the WWF title from the Ultimate Warrior (go ahead, do the math), and I didn’t buy it, even with Macho-ference. There was never a second where I didn’t believe that Hogan was going to take the title back from Slaughter, which was a huge disappointment to me. The complete lack of suspense surrounding this match made it totally unenjoyable for me, even as a kid that still mostly thought wrestling was real.

1. Yokozuna (c) vs. Hulk Hogan (Wrestlemania IX) – Everything about this was wrong. It totally undermined Yokozuna’s literally newfound credibility. It totally undermined Bret Hart’s credibility. It totally undermined any faith that WWE had shown to that point that they felt they were equipped to survive without Hulk Hogan. One thing is true about Vince McMahon: For all his genius, he occasionally panics. In the late 80’s and early 90’s, Hulk Hogan was the panic button. Storming in after an under whelming tag team match/program/return to win the title, Hogan represented everything wrong with this era of WWF/E history.

James Wright
HM: Yokozuna vs. Bret Hart (Wrestlemania IX) – Same deal as last week, wasn’t there, couldn’t be let down too much. But in this case just watching the match made me annoyed, more for the ending than anything else. Without the dizzying high that was Hulkamania this just looked like Hogan stealing the spotlight for himself once again.
HM: Yokozuna vs. Bret Hart – Repeated without the Hulkamania ending, and yet still nearly as bad.
HM: Lawrence Taylor vs. Bam Bam Bigelow – I get the appeal of this match and what it achieved but really, what was the point in making it the main event? There was just no need.

5. Triple H vs. The Rock vs. Big Show vs. Mick Foley (Wrestlemania XVI) – This was the epitome of the Attitude Era, overbooked to all hell and dragging on with barely any point to it. Sure there were a couple of entertaining spots but overall the whole thing was a mess and not something that should have been a main event on the Grandest Stage of them all.

4. John Cena vs. Triple H (Wrestlemania XXII) – Before there was Triple H and Shawn Michael monopolizing the spotlight against the Undertaker there was John Cena. Now you could see this as the former cream of the crop tipping their hat to the newest but if that is the case then why did Triple H crush Orton a couple of years later. Instead this was just another attempt to push Super Cena as ‘The Man’ when no one wanted it. I think that most people were actually behind Triple H in this one, thinking that if anyone had the ego to take Cena down a peg it was the Cerebral Assassin, and yet for once he actually gave him the nod, it was stomach churning.

3. John Cena vs. Shawn Michaels (Wrestlemania XXIII) – The second attempt to give Cena ‘the rub’. More pointless than the first because if beating The Game didn’t work then why on earth would the fans take to Cena when he beat The Showstopper. Again I thought that Michaels might have a shot and again I was disappointed. People wonder why wrestling has gone downhill, I blame the Cena years, no one in this day and age (at least anyone over the age of ten and has a penis) buys the Hulk Hogan vibe of an unstoppable Superman. In later years the WWE would realize this, but at this point they were still laboring under a delusion that would cost them three years of decent potential main events.

2. Triple H vs. Randy Orton (Wrestlemania XXV) – I think the biggest let down here is that for the silver anniversary of Wrestlemania the main event was the same as last year, minus John Cena. You might think that this would be a good thing but in the end the match was too simple and didn’t cash in on the idea of Randy Orton taking the crown away from Triple H, something he couldn’t do before when he first won the title. It was a chance to show how far the Apex Predator had progressed and instead Triple H let his ego shine through once again and showed that Orton was just the same second-rate punk compared to the Game.

1. Triple H vs. Batista (Wrestlemania XXI) – This to me will always be the worst Wrestlemania I have ever witnessed, mainly because it saw John Cena topple JBL and start his journey as the face of the WWE, Randy Orton lost his face momentum and spent a year toiling under the oppressive yolk of the Undertaker, and there was this, probably the most predictable main event in Wrestlemania history. Some might say that it was the perfect build to Batista dethroning the King of Kings, but to me it just made me press fast forward. As much as we complain about meaningless swerves and the need for simple storytelling, this idea of Batista being the unstoppable face who Triple H couldn’t beat was so simple that there was almost no point in the match itself. We don’t want swerves for no reason but what people forget is that being as professional wrestling is a fixed sport we kind of need something to liven things up and this had nothing.

Robert S. Leighty Jr
HM: Taylor vs. Bigelow – Good celebrity match, but not a good WrestleMania Main Event.
HM: HHH vs. Batista – They did much better in all return matches.
HM: Bundy vs. Hogan – Standard Hogan vs. Big Man match, but seemed like they could have done something bigger.

5. WWE Title: HHH © vs. Randy Orton (WrestleMania XXV) – This match featured a great build with Orton hearing voices and killing the McMahons including Steph, but then we got this dog of a match. I was there in the crowd and it was scary how dead things got. Sure part of that could have been because we were burnt out following Shawn/Taker, but at same time this match did nothing to bring us back. What should have been a hate filled brawl was a dull match that was hindered by the stupid tacked on stipulation.

4. WWF Title: Yokozuna © vs. Bret Hart (WrestleMania X) – The ending was great and put Bret over huge, but that match wasn’t very good. Yoko was getting a little larger at this point and wasn’t the guy he was a year ago, but I will give big guy credit as he looked a hell of a lot more motivated here than he did in the earlier Luger match as I suspect he wanted to do all he could for Bret.

3. WWE Title: The Miz © vs. John Cena (WrestleMania XXVII) – I feel short changed considering I have been to last 3 WrestleManias and got 2 crappy Main Events. The fans behind me were pissed they bought a package a year and got this Main Event. The Miz was not ready for this and Cena has been great in big matches but usually when he has someone to play off of. The lame double count-out killed the crowd and best part was The Rock giving Cena a Rock Bottom.

2. Sid vs. Hulk Hogan (WrestleMania VIII) – I feel kind of bad that Sid was part of two worst Main Events in WrestleMania history, but dude is probably enjoying all his cash from those pay days so not like he would care. It kills me to put a Hogan match on here because no matter how bad a Hogan match could be I was a big enough fan that I could put on blinders and find something to enjoy. The saving grace was the surprise return of The Ultimate Warrior, but that didn’t help the actual match.

1. WWF Title: Sid © vs. The Undertaker (WrestleMania 13) – I can live with bad matches that feature a good story or a hot crowd to at least hold my attention. What I can stand is a bad match that bores the crowd to tears. This was in no way a WrestleMania Main Event, and if not for Bret/Austin saving the show this would be the Main Event to the worst WrestleMania of all time. The only good parts were Bret’s pre match promo and interference and Shawn on commentary.

SCOTT RUTHERFORD
5. HHH vs. The Rock vs. The Big Show vs. Mick Foley – WM16 – This match should have been The Rock destroying HHH on his way to winning the WWF title. Instead it had a recently retired man (Foley) a man that was really not considered a main eventer (Show) and a McMahon in every corner to bollocks up the works. I’ve never been one that says every main event title match needs to be a one-on-one match but I do think that match itself needs to make sense and this…no sense. It also marked the first time a heel had walked out of the main event the winning much to the surprise (and disgust for most) of the watching audience. Given how great Rock/HHH was at the next months Backlash PPV and how off the charts the heat was, it only emphasized how lame this was.

4. Kurt Angle vs. Brock Lesnar – WM19 – I’m going to catch hell for this but I don’t care. Thanks to Kurt and his neck this match was only a fraction of what it could have been. For all of his risk taking, watching Kurt wrestling with such a bad injury is still hard to look at today and while he gave great effort you have to notice that he wasn’t his usual self. Add in the fact the ending was botched and Brock nearly killed himself and it was a wholly disappointing match.

3. Chris Jericho vs. HHH – WM18 – Everything about this match was wrong. Jericho as champion was considered an afterthought to the match as he played second fiddle to the Steph/Hunter storyline. Hunter for his part had only just returned back from his first quad tear and was about 50lbs overloaded with muscle and was a fraction of the worker he was pre-injury and took years to get back to a good. The match itself was okay if a little plodding and has barely any heat after the crowd had peaked with the Rock/Hogan classic a couple of matches prior. Add all this up and you had fans heading for the door during the match.

2. Sid Vicious vs. The Undertaker – WM13 – The WWE had a run during the mid-90’s where WM’s felt like just another PPV and you wouldn’t miss much by missing the whole thing. Headline matches like this one only served to magnify that lack of drawing power these cards had. What should have been and absolutely huge match to put over The Undertaker getting the championship ball for his first extended run started off with a whimper. Sure UT was a victim of circumstance and being forced to lug around Sid in the ring, but this match blew and blew hard.

1. Yokozuna vs. Hulk Hogan – WM9 – This is the worst case of ego stroke you are likely to find when it comes to wrestling. Hogan deserves a bucket load of accolades when it comes to wrestling but the politicking that went into this and just the action of cutting the legs from under Bret Hart and Yokozuna was appalling and served nothing positive for the business. This is an almost unanimous pick for worst main event ever and for good reason.

Jon Butterfield
5. Hulk Hogan & Mr T (with Jimmy Snuka) vs. Roddy Piper & Paul Orndorff (w/ Bob Orton) ((w/ Muhammad Ali & Pat Patterson as the special guest referees)) – Prior to the Attitude Era, no main event in Wrestlemania history could boast the kind of over-booking that the original Wrestlemania main event enjoyed. Before the idea that a one on one contest to determine the number one wrestler in the entire industry had proved itself a successful blueprint for ‘The Biggest Show of Them All’, Vince McMahon decided that the product he was hawking heading into Wrestlemania I was nowhere near sufficient to entertain all those outside the ‘hardcore’ of wrestling fans – and, after all, it was the casual/undecided fans he wanted to entice into parting with their hard-earned money year after year. His plan? Partner Hulk Hogan with an actor on the first WM, have them face a couple of legitimate wrestlers (both sides needing managers, apparently), and throw in two referees (of which one is the greatest boxer of all time, Muhammad Ali). If I haven’t used enough brackets already for your tastes, by the way, there’s something wrong with you… Anyway, the whole idea of all of this was to confuse you – you see, you sit back, you see (multiple: and there are those brackets again) referees making mistakes, you see managers making ill-advised interferences, and you see a guy that can’t wrestle fail to wrestle, and VOILA! Suddenly you’ve got a clusterfuck no one quite knows how to rate, an ending that means nothing (given the interference), and a grave foreshadowing of everything that has ever been wrong with WWF/E! After all, what more can anyone POSSIBLY want?! You know, apart from an actual meaningful exhibition of what wrestling is actually all about… but who cares about that?

4. Triple H (with Stephanie) vs. The Rock (with Vince) vs. Mick Foley (with Linda) vs. Big Show (with Shane) – First things first, look at that line up and tell me how, on ANY plane of consciousness or thought, Foley or Show had ANY chance of winning. We all knew that they were upper midcarders and nothing more, and that Linda and Shane were bit-part characters, so what was the point of their participation in a four-way?! And while you’re at it, perhaps you can tell me why it wouldn’t have been a better idea to put Foley and Show in a singles match to determine a number one contender to then challenge for the title at Backlash 2000, a ‘lesser’ show that actually went on to showcase the main event everybody REALLY wanted at Wrestlemania in HHH-Rock one-on-one? I mean, come on… Backlash > WrestleMania? What’s the thought there? Anyway, somebody thought no, you know what, this is Wrestlemania 2000, and 2000 is a big number, so this needs to be extra-specially overbooked… So, instead of two fights that made sense we got 36 minutes of convoluted crap that nobody knew how to deal with – least of all WWF brass.

3. Lawrence Taylor vs. Bam Bam Bigelow – Actually, very few critics bashed this match at the time, so that’s something – but really, they had Shawn Michaels against Diesel in a title fight that actually mattered BEFORE this, and hindsight is always a useful tool in taking apart poor booking decisions, so it won’t get any defense from me. Bottom line, this should never have been a Wrestlemania main event, it had no credibility as a competitive OR historical bout (though god bless Bam Bam for putting Taylor over), and it hasn’t aged well… at all. Besides, Lawrence Taylor is a nobody over here (UK), and Wrestlemania is meant to cater for the worldwide audience, NOT just American fans – so that’s a bit of shortsightedness too. Still, like I say, very few slated Taylor’s performance at the time so it’s a bit rich to do that now, but this was midcard material at best.

2. Hulk Hogan vs. Sid Justice – Flaw number one: Instead of Ric Flair vs. Hulk Hogan for the WWF Championship belt (the original plan), the main event we got at Wrestlemania VIII was actually Hulk Hogan vs. Sid Justice NOT for the WWF Championship belt. Flair, by the way, actually dropped the title to Randy Savage in a midcard slot… go figure. Flaw number two: the planned ending that involved a run in from Papa Shango/The Godfather (apparently worthy of such a huge opportunity for… I don’t know… whatever reason) actually failed to materialize. Why? Because the Wrestlemania VIII main event was always destined to be one of the worst of all time (if you can come up with a better reason, help me out). Indeed, that’s how it all materialized, because these two complement each other in all the wrong ways, and while poor mechanics and stylistics can sometimes be put aside for a meaningful story with a purposeful ending, we got none of that here: the desperate ‘ending’ actually came when Harvey Whippleman ran in (you know, because Shango didn’t bother), caused a DQ, nullified the entire point of the bout, and, thankfully, allowed us to forgot all about how bad this main event really was (until I reminded us).

1. Hulk Hogan vs. Yokozuna – 21 seconds. TWENTY ONE SECONDS. That’s how long the worst Wrestlemania ending in history lasted. Hogan, looking extra-specially crap on account of an unexplained black eye, ran in looking ten years older than he actually was, checked on his ‘buddy’ Bret Hart (yeah right), and ended up getting challenged to a title fight by the newly-crowned Champion Yokozuna’s manager Mr Fuji (why Fuji wasn’t fired on the spot, I’ll never know – imagine that happening in boxing or MMA – it just doesn’t make any sense! Hey, I’m Don King, congrats, Tyson, how about another fight we didn’t prepare for right now for no money without signing a contract?!). Anyway, yeah. Not only did Fuji put his Champion in harm’s way, he then threw the entire bout out of the window by blinding Yoko with ‘powder’ – no DQ here either way, though, because Hogan is back and he needs to be Champion RIGHT NOW! What a load of crap – and actually, Bret Hart vs. Yokozuna wasn’t as bad as anyone expected, so why bury it in the first place!? Yeah, Wrestlemania IX sucked…

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