The Heel Report: 06.30.13: Puppets and Muscles

Each Week there are ten places, with points out of ten awarded based on these positions. These points are then added to a rolling chart that will continue each week to show who is wrestling’s overall top heel.

This is a place where the heels of wrestling can be praised for all the hard work they do trying to get us all to hate them, so without further ado let’s get on with the report…

Weekly Top Ten

1st Place: The Shield

The general dominance of this group is astounding, it has gotten to the point where the WWE have to ration out their appearances as if they are main eventers, and yet they also stoop so low as to go against glorified jobbers, all the while still looking great. Honestly if the WWE mess this up after all the good they have done for them then there is no hope for the company to recapture the glory they once had since they will never be able to build up credible stars again, preferably ones that don’t have half the audience against them constantly, and is so crappy that they get praised for delivering a promo that simply isn’t shit and full of crap jokes, you know who I mean!

2nd Place: Mark Henry

Not as enthralling as his speech last week but Henry still managed to build more towards his inevitable match with Cena at Money in the Bank. Once again everyone is looking past Henry as an opponent to Summerslam and the potential Cena vs. Bryan for the WWE title, but you never know, things change all the time in the WWE and Henry’s performance last week might have almost been enough to convince the company to give him a short run with the belt, even if it only lasts for a couple of weeks. I still love how he counters the crowds incessant ‘what?!’ chants by calling them puppets.

3rd Place: AJ Lee

In what was perhaps a bit of a slow week for heels, AJ manages to once again secure herself a high spot on the chart by making Natalya submit, proving that she is no joke, and then showing that her rival Kaitlyn is, with a spot-on impression of her on Raw. I know some people didn’t like this and I will be the first to admit that it wasn’t exactly genius, but I liked all the gender-joking and muscle posing, and despite no one actually rooting for Kaitlyn it adds another layer of meaning to this feud as Kaitlyn further searches for redemption, I hope she doesn’t actually get it but still, some people might want that.

4th Place: The Wyatt Family

While Bray Wyatt and his family have everyone highly anticipating their debut to the main roster, the team are still ruling the roost on the backlog of NXT tapings, this week winning a main event six-man tag. With Harper and Rowan as the tag team champions it is just a shame that Wyatt almost certainly won’t get the opportunity to be NXT champion himself before being called up, as the guy certainly deserves to be. Hell what urks me more than anything else is that as soon as the former Husky Harris was able to debut this gimmick he was taken out with an injury and so got nowhere near enough time to develop a following on NXT before moving on, I really would have liked to have seen more with him and I have no doubt that he would have indeed been NXT champion had he not had to miss so much time from the ring at such an inopportune time.

5th Place: Christopher Daniels

The man who describes himself as ‘sexually delicious’ managed to pick up a surprise win in the Bound For Glory Series against Hernandez to earn himself seven points. What’s more he did it in splendid heel fashion with an unseen low blow and a BEM to boot. Daniels deserves better than simply being tag team fodder and hopefully with the BFG Series finally underway he can get some time to shine as a singles wrestler once again, against an opponent other than AJ Styles.

6th Place: Bully Ray

The President of the Aces & 8s once again tried to play mind games and was present throughout the show, however he also ended the night face down on the stage with an ankle-lock applied by the newest member of the ‘reformed’ Main Event Mafia. Will this angle go anywhere? Eh. As long as it pads things out until the eventual Styles vs. Bully match at Bound For Glory then who cares?

7th Place: Austin Aries

An arguably easier win than Christopher Daniels’ over Hernandez to take away seven points in the BFG Series, in the beating of Jay Bradley with a Brain Buster on Impact. Still Aries continues to show why he is the greatest man who ever lived and really should be in the main event scene once again.

8th Place: Alberto Del Rio

While Del Rio’s heel turn has been a welcome one it is hard for him to score points on the chart when every time he appears he is either losing matches, getting attacked by Ziggler, or in most cases both. I like seeing Ziggler get measures of revenge over Del Rio and hopefully this will lead to a much bigger title win for the Show Off, but Del Rio’s momentum is certainly suffering because of it.

9th Place: Curtis Axel

A successful defence of his title against Wade Barrett gets Curtis Axel a place on the chart, I hope that Axel can get some new challengers sometime soon, just don’t let it be someone like Christian, who would probably out-class the kid at this point in his development.

10th Place: Mr Anderson

The last place on the chart further goes to show how the BFG Series can work in TNA’s favour; it adds an extra importance to matches and highlights singles competitors. Also it encourages heels to get clean wins over faces, although usually through nefarious means, and so much the better. Case in point how Anderson managed to take out Park on Impact last week, although he shouldn’t really have needed help to defeat the former lawyer, but nevermind about that.