Smart Marks 11.9.13: Lull in the Action

Welcome back one and all, and thank you for again taking the time to join me in another installment of Smart Marks, where we touch on a variety of topics each week, and use our vast voices to show where we stand on things. We may not agree on everything, but hey, at least we have a place to just sit back and pretend we’re in a room with our wrestling fan friends, right?

I’m fine with this. I’m fine with Big Show getting a title shot. I’m fine with Big Show taking over Daniel Bryan’s spot in the main event (because as I called in the Hell in a Cell Roundtable, Bryan’s winning the Rumble. Just for the record.), and I’m fine with this being our big feud now.

What I’m not fine with, however, is Big Show completely stealing the “YES!” chant. I’m sure the contrarians will argue that Bryan didn’t create the word “Yes” and thus it’s not “his” chant. It must get tired being the devil’s advocate all the time.

Daniel Bryan got “YES!” and “NO!” over with the fans by sheer goofy willpower. And while WWE is telling us that D-Bry isn’t good enough to be an A-Guy, and that he’s too small or too whatever to not justify giving him the ball, we’re also reminded by other stars that he’s actually the best thing on the roster.

Big Show knows that he doesn’t have the full support of the fans. He’s always been really good at reading the fans and reacting. My favorite example of this was his ECW match with Batista. While the crowd crapped all over both of them and their match, Big Show smiled. While Batista lost his cool (while still trying to be a good guy) and started getting angry with the fans, Big Show played along. He slowed the match down. He unleashed clubbing shots. My point is, Big Show KNOWS how to work the crowd at all times.

So make no mistake that his stealing from Bryan is one of two things- a way to get those who don’t like him to cheer for him like Pavlov’s many dogs, or a way to show that he’s “cool” with the guy that the fans go crazy for.

And don’t twist this- I’m not like personally mad at Paul Wight for stealing the chant. I just don’t see why Big Show is walking around pointing to the sky screaming “YES!” repeatedly on Raw. We all know he’s not leaving with the belt, and maybe that’s why they’re pushing it so hard. Maybe that’s why. That doesn’t mean I have to like watching the best part of the show basically put in a garage and stripped down for parts that the other guys can use. Is the Miz gonna grow a goat beard now? Maybe Heath Slater can start using the LeBell Lock. Maroon trunks for Cody Rhodes?

It was bad enough when Alberto del Rio first stole from Bryan, but it was allowed because, hyuk, “Sí isn’t the same as Yes!” Or something like that. In a world where no two wrestlers can have the same move, or even sometimes can’t have the same name, having two guys steal the hottest chant from one of the most popular guys on the roster doesn’t make me think that they’re also really popular – it just makes them look like hacks.

Pushing Big Show as a tailcoat riding hack isn’t the best way to go about building a challenger, in my opinion.

What’d you think of Big Show taking the chant? Just angry that Big Show took Bryan’s spot? Hate Daniel Bryan and glad that he’s out of the main event? You know the drill!

That said- having the FIRST match in the FIRST round of the TNA “Title” Tournament be a freaking TLC (Full Metal Mayhem) match is just ridiculous.

Uh oh – I’m not gonna be 100% complimentary towards TNA for a little bit here. I hope you’ll all survive.

The fact that, mere weeks after sitting through the Bound For Glory Series to determine a #1 contender to the championship, we’re now sitting through yet another tournament to determine a “#1 contender” (interim champ, whatever; the winner’s facing AJ, duh) to the championship drives me crazy. TNA’s need to always have “chaos” can really grind on the viewer at times.

Then, on top of having yet another tournament to sit through, they add this Wheel of Dixie, so that EVERY match will have some sort of stupid stipulation tacked onto it.

And that awesome premise was kicked off with Chris Sabin and Jeff Hardy on Impact. Was the match horrible? No, of course not. You may not believe this, but that Sabin kid and Hardy cat? They know how to wrestle in ladder matches. So, shockingly, the match was pretty good. No one’s complaining about match quality.

What I am complaining about is the unnecessary addition of these stipulations in the first place. Isn’t fighting for a chance at winning the title enough? What about making it so that the FINAL match in the tournament was a stipulation match? Won’t seeing a second round table match or reverse battle royal be a bit underwhelming after seeing a frickin Full Metal Mayhem match as the FIRST match in the whole tournament??

I swear, you could ask TNA to make you a chocolate chip cookie, and they’d come back with a gold flake blasted, oven roasted pink chocolate chip and mintberry crunch cookie souffle with sparklers that set off the fire alarms in your house and soak everything inside. And all you wanted was a cookie.

All we want is simple booking and great action. A title tournament is pretty easy. Win and move on, lose and you’re screwed. Adding tables, ladders, chairs, or whatever else they want doesn’t up the stakes; if anything, in my opinion, it waters everything down. I can see the counterpoint here- that in order to EARN a title shot, you don’t just have to wrestle regular matches- you have to go through some of the most twisted, demanding matches in existence. I don’t know, it just feels like adding fire on the ropes of the Royal Rumble. Sometimes, too much is just overkill.

What’s your take? Am I too butthurt about the stipulation matches heading our way? Comment!

First off, big ups to everyone who jumped on commenter Berlyn last week. It’s nice to see that not everyone is that blind.

Last week, as I mentioned above, I wrote a TNA Column that simply speculated on its sale. I felt I was pretty fair, and was adamant in my love and appreciation for TNA, all irritating habits aside.

Still, one of those types came out of the woodwork. The TNA Defender, the reader who sees ANY type of negative print about their beloved wrestling league, and immediately decides that it’s just “another” TNA hate column. Especially here at 411, where we all totally hate TNA so much.

So, first things first: this isn’t for you if you enjoy WWE and TNA. This isn’t for you if you enjoy WWE and hate TNA. This is for you if you LOVE TNA and hate WWE.

You TNA defenders, I have a question: what causes you to be so damn defensive? How can you possibly read something that says “I love TNA” and accuse the writer of nothing more than hate? Sure, sure, I’m feeding the trolls, and that’s probably my biggest mistake here. I just don’t see what would even possess that line of thought after reading last week’s column. A writer hoping that TNA isn’t going to get bought and scrapped means that it’s “another” bash column? Do you guys honestly believe that TNA does nothing wrong? That every single move they’ve ever made is perfect? That WWE never gets made fun of or has bad things said about it?

I’m honestly shocked. I had joked a couple weeks back with a buddy that I was going to do a series- one column about 3 things I love about WWE, then 3 things I hate about it the next week. That would be followed up with a 3 things I love about TNA, and then the series would end with 3 things I hate about TNA. I joked that the “Things I hate about TNA” would get the most response, with everyone saying something like “Oh wow what a surprise, another guy that hates TNA.” Of course, these people would be ignoring the previous three columns. Kind of like how they ignore anything wrong with TNA.

Well, last week proved my hypothesis, and I didn’t have to crank out 4 weeks’ worth of columns to do it. Just because I pointed out that their market presence is atrocious, I *must* be bashing TNA. So friggin sensitive sometimes. So, here we go, TNA Defenders, here’s your chance. Why so serious? Do you honestly believe that everyone just unfairly “hates” on TNA at all times?

And do you realize that I LOVE TNA? That even if I say something negative about it, it comes from a place of love? Or do we just continue with the “Cry whenever TNA isn’t likened to the most perfect things of all time, ever” mantra?

Let’s go. Let’s figure this out. I don’t want TNA Fans to be the abused segment anymore. I’m here to help. Help me help you.

Until next week, enjoy your WWE, your TNA, your Lucha, your Puro, and your Indies!