The Quick Talkdown 11.11.06: The De-“Feet” of the Heel

Back from East Asia. I must say that the trip was quite freshing and I’m looking forward to getting back to the ol’ grind stone so to speak. There is a certain sadness when the journey ends. There is the satisfaction of two countries well travelled, but there is also the left over residue knowing that you have to get back to your normal work week. Don’t forget the feelings of, “Man, that was too fast. What I wouldn’t pay for one more day.” Yet at any rate, I will not focus on this as my happy chipper mood might swing into a true blue depression.

This topic has no-doubtedly been covered before but I thought I would toss my name into the fire of heel believers. There are two elements to movies, books, comic books, wrestling, and video games that makes a storyline work. One word sums it up. Conflict. In order for me to spend $40 on WWE PPV, I need to know there will be some good whole-hearted storyline behind the matches on the card.

For you wrestling purists, I, like you, enjoy a good wrestling match, however, there is nothing like some good ol’ drama to make things interesting. Have you ever seen a good long wrestling match on television or on PPV, that eventually makes your eyes heavy. Makes you want to fall asleep? The match has high spots with chair spots, acrobatic maneuvers, blading or the occassional run-in. The reason is simple, no back story. No promos or anything to connect you to the match. Now take it, your eyes could also be heavy if you’re watching WWE or TNA on late night television, but you know what I mean.

Why is professional wrestling more popular than amateur or free style wrestling? It’s because the athletes involved pick up a microphone and bad mouth their opponent or the audience. Who does this? Everyone’s favorite wrestler… the heel. The protagonist. The asshole. The morally depraved wrestler who kicked the crap out of the good guy’s mother to prove a point. The wrestler who says our favorite sports teams suck and is the thorn in everyone’s side.

The babyface a.k.a. victim or the good guy is black and white. He is the, “I can do no wrong” guy. The Hulk Hogan or the Ricky Steamboat always waving to the fans and kissing babies. The guy every fan respects and loves because he kicked the ever living shit out of the heel. The guy’s personality, that if on his own would bore us to tears. Look at poor John Cena as World Champion. He’s got an awesome gimmick, add some overexposure, and you have a character you want to see in pain.

Now take it the babyface was revolutionized in the late ’90s where wise ass good guys like “Stone Cold” Steve Austin and The Rock popped on the scene, but we only loved them because again, they kicked the snot out of the bad guys.

Many wrestlers such as Triple H prefer being the heel. It’s easy to do and is more fun. You can take the worst parts of your personality and amplify them so everyone hates you. While playing the babyface, your personality if often repressed. That sense of perfection must be maintained. It takes a lot to be a face because you can’t force people to love you. Look at the early days of Rocky Miavia and “I Lost My Smile” Shawn Michaels as good examples. Rocky was true blue nice, but never garnered any fan following until he became a heel. Shawn Michaels only suffered through the “over-exposed face” disease.

TYPES OF HEELS

THE CROOKED EMPLOYER: Vince McMahon and Eric Bischoff have personafied the asshole employers well. These are great examples of heels because there are many of us, including myself who have no use for our boss. Why? He made me stay extra hours or she didn’t give me that promotion. What an asshole! Good example.

THE VULGAR ROGUE — The best kind of heel. The guy who just doesn’t give a shit about the system and spites people and the rules. Shawn Michaels gets a gold medal for this one but take it the pendulum has swung here and this kind of person is considered the rogue babyface as well. Steve Austin and The Rock are two good examples.

THE TRADITIONAL TIGHTASS — Bob Backlund and Bret Hart may stand up. Here are two wholesome guys who truly believe their own press. They believe in good wrestling and that all should aspire to their level of professionalism. Actually, add Kurt Angle here now too. However, these self-righteous assholes can be interpreted as snobs and therefore can make five star heels. Especially for the vulgar rogues.

THE TOWN BULLY– Triple H can stand up here. Before Mr. Helmsley started dabbling into good guy-dom, there was probably no better heel than Triple H. His character was an authentic bad bully who with or without his Evolution members beat the snot out of people with his sledgehammer. This is great for the long term heel.

THE EVIL RICH BIG MOUTHS — Two names. Ted Dibiase and “The Nature Boy” Ric Flair. The Million Dollar Man was the first heel I ever encountered when I became a fan of pro wrestling years ago. Ever since then, he’s become my measuring stick of how heels should be. Of course there are heels that exceed Mr. Deep Pockets, but paying a fan to kiss your feet or wipe the sweat from your body to envoke humiliation spells asshole to me. Let’s not forget “The Heel of Heels” Ric Flair. Here is a guy who only prides himself on the best champagne while looking down on others who don’t share his limousine rides.

HEEL BEHAVIOUR

I must say, ’80’s wrestling had very specific behaviours that defined a heel. During a match, Ric Flair would rig someone in the eyes to turn the tide or hook the tights to win the match. My favorite is Rowdy Roddy Piper who would just poke his opponent in the eye or maybe resort to biting. Don’t forget Greg “The Hammer” Valentine who loved to pull his opponents hair. Now it’s sledehammers and doing slutty Litas on TV that define heel behaviour. Is this bad? Nope.. just, evolution, baby.