The Wrestling News Experience: 01.22.07

The Super Bowl looks like it’s going to be offence vs defence, and really all that matters to me is that the Patriots choked and died like I asked so very nicely. Somebody wake up Littal over in Sports and tell him that Indy made the Super Bowl, so he has to pay attention to them.

Meanwhile, Studio 60 is back and I couldn’t be happier, if only because I’m finally learning the 48 rules to amassing power. If one of them is “have an Internet column read by thousands”, then I’m already ahead of the game.

I also want to go the record as stating I don’t care what Larry’s big surprise is tomorrow. Or maybe I’m just in on it. Feed the paranoia!

Moving on.

PPV In Review…

Wait, you mean there wasn’t a PPV last night? But there’s been one every Sunday for the last two months or something, so I just assumed…

Well, shoot. What the hell am I going to use to fill the first two pages today? Actual news? Okay, let’s try that.

Around The Horn

Well, a couple big stories for the first time in a while, only question is, which do I lead with?

Sadly, we’ll go with the news that Scott “Bam Bam” Bigelow was found dead in his home last week. He was 45, and has often been credited as one of the best and most agile big men of his time. He is best remembered for facing Lawrence Taylor in the main event of WrestleMania 11 in a feud that I largely enjoyed, and which coincidentally occurred around the time I went from minor casual fan of wrestling to super-huge, giant nerd fan of wrestling. In fact, the Taylor-Bigelow match is the only one from WrestleMania XI that I ever actually saw, due to TSN (I think) airing it in a special feature one night shortly after the event. Bigelow was 45.

WWE announced the release of about a dozen Superstars and several farm system wrestlers this past week, in what has become a semi-annual trimming of the lower-card talent. Nothing too spectacular this year, mostly jobbers and people who haven’t been on TV in forever, which will be detailed in the usual place. The most notable names were probably The Bashams, who were considered future main eventers while they were developing in OVW, Sylvester Terkay, who never really got his feet under him, and Tatanka, last seen fighting with Jimmy Wang Yang in a modern re-telling of the whole Cowboys vs Indians feud. So I guess the Indians lost this time, too.

WWE has announced that they will now be taping the ECW on Sci-Fi shows prior to Smackdown tapings, so they will not air live. This is allegedly due to WWE management not being happy with the live shows. I’d suggest that writing better shows might fix that problem faster, but I’m sure the live environment was what was the real issue.

Rumours that this move to tape ECW so they can edit before airtime was done so that they can edit the “TNA” chants out of Marquis Cor Von (and kudos to whoever thought THAT was a name that would sell tickets) matches are, as far as you know, entirely untrue. WWE doesn’t care about TNA chants. They have no effect on them whatsoever.

Anyway, the Royal Rumble press conference will be the last of its type for the forseeable future, allegedly due to the fact that WWE was unhappy with fan reactions, including but not limited to chanting “TNA” loudly during the broadcast.

Pause for effect.

WWE will not be holding Survivor Series in Montreal this year, choosing not to hold the same event in the same place as the infamous Screwjob, ten years ago. This announcement was accompanied by a Shawn Michaels promo where he told Canadians to get over it and let it go, then proceeded to rub a copy of the Bret Hart DVD on his backside while high-fiving Vince McMahon.

Okay, that last part didn’t really happen. But the fact is, you believed it might be possible. Scary, isn’t it.

And before I leave this segment, WWE has announced that this week, Kane, MVP, King Booker, Chris Benoit, Fit Finlay, and The Miz will be involved in an Over The Top Rope Challenge this week on Smackdown. Something about this match has prompted me to spontaneously break into song.

One of these things is not like the others,
One of these things just doesn’t belong.
Can you tell me which of these things is not like the others
Now before I finish this song?

That’s right, I’m mocking The Miz Sesame Street style. There’s no comeback for that. I just win.

The Injury Bug Bites

Inactive List as of 01.15.07

WWE

– Beth Phoenix, RAW, out indefinitely as of June 6 (jaw)
– Candice Michelle, RAW, day-to-day (broken nose)
– Chris Jericho, out indefinitely (kayfabe, fired)
– Mark Henry, SD!, out 6-8 months as of July 15th (patella)
– Michelle McCool, SD!, out indefinitely (enlarged kidney and electrolyte imbalance)
– Paul Burchill, SD!, out indefinitely as of May 29 (shoulder)
– Rey Mysterio, SD!, out indefinitely as of October 2006 (knee surgery)
– Triple H, RAW, out 4-6 months as of January 7 (torn quadriceps)

TNA

No major injuries.

Transactions

Ooh, time to earn my pay. If only I got paid.

*deep breath*

– Al Snow, released from his wrestling contract (will remain a trainer)

– CW Anderson, The Gymini, Tatanka, Sylvester Terkay, Jazz, Rodney Mack, Tony Mamaluke, Gangrel, Doug and Danny Basham, Bill DeMott, released from their contracts

*gasp*

Okay, nothing really to see here, I think honestly none of these were going to change the face of wrestling or anything. This is actually a pretty tame set of releases. Remember other release days when entire groups of people who’d just been on TV got released? Those were crazy. Even crazier, I kind of miss the A-Train.

– Ace Steel, signed to a WWE contract
– Cassidy Riley, signed to a WWE contract

Just a couple minor signings, Steel played Donald Trump in the thing that nobody should be forced to remember from a couple weeks ago and is apparently a pretty good wrestler. Too bad he’s too short.

– Deuce and Domino w/Cherry, debuted on Smackdown January 19

Hey, it’s a tag team on Smackdown again. Hopefully they last longer than KC James and Idol Stevens. Whatever happened to them, anyway?

– Kurt Angle, TNA, working through injury (concussion)

Okay, who had concussion in the pool? Anyone? Okay, the money’s still up for grabs, then.

– “The Alpha Male” Marquis Cor Von, ECW, debuted on ECW January 16

I know they don’t want to give TNA any credit, but come on, he’s got the word “Pounce” on the back of his tights, call the move. Great sell by Riley, by the way. And I join with others in saying that there’s no way a guy from the African Savannah comes out to that music.

One Year Ago This Experience

Originally posted 01.23.06, and I had finally started watching Impact regularly. One year later, I’m sorry people, I just can’t. I mean, I physically can’t. It’s on at 9 pm and since I work Thursdays, that’s when I tape Grey’s Anatomy, Scrubs, and 30 Rock. Speaking of which, boy do I have issues tonight, what with 24 and Heroes. It’s like choosing between two of my children!

Isn’t that sad.

Plus, MTV announced they were starting a wrestling promotion, Fit Finlay debuted this week and won us all over by beating the piss out of everyone, I followed through on a threat to print Shakespeare excerpts if I didn’t get any mail (still in effect, by the way), and the Canadian populace elected a Conservative government and have been regretting it ever since. I warned you all!

The Wrestling Fan’s Experience

This week’s Experience is brought to you by Adam Lyerly

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I grew up in the 1980’s, and like any kid I knew about the WWF and Hulk Hogan. The bad thing about it was that my parents did not let me watch it because I was already hyper. I did watch the WWF cartoon that was on saturday mornings, though. And I do remember watching the half hour preview for Wrestlemania IV that they played over and over to get you to order it. I remember so vividly sitting watching that preview over and over and over wishing that I could just watch that one event because they hyped it up to be so good.

Fast forward to 1997. I am a college student at Liberty University in Lynchburg, Va. Many of the guys in my dorm were wrestling fans because of the whole WCW/nWo angle. Many of those fans had been fans since childhood. It was not uncommon to hear of the legendary Dusty Rhodes and Ric Flair battles, or of the dreaded “Black Scorpion” who haunted the Stinger. These reminiscences made me feel like I had missed out on something special. One of the guys in my dorm, Big Honkin’ Steve, was a huge wrestling fan and he had a friend that had a Nitro party every Monday nite. I had actually watched my very first Nitro over the summer, but had no idea what was going on. I started going every Monday nite in the fall of 1997. I became hooked immediately after the whole Fall Brawl cage match where Curt Hennig turned against the Horseman and led to Flair’s head being slammed in the cage door. The drama was incredible. I was a hardcore WCW fan after that, watching every Monday nite and sometimes Saturday nite. I picked ujp a WWF magazine at the newsstand one time and there was an ad for the complete
Wrestlemania box set on VHS 1-13. I spent the 79.99 plus tax and ordered the set. I
still say that it was the best 80 bucks I have ever spent. I watched all of those, along with everyone else in my dorm, about a thousand times over the next few years.

I watched both WWF and WCW rabidly throughout college and beyond. I have been to 23 live events since my first WCW house show in April of 1998. I am living out my longtime dream this year when myself and two buddies go to Wrestlemania 23 in Detroit!!!! I love wrestling. But I have to be honest that I don’t watch every show. In fact, the last pay per view event I saw was Wrestlemania 22. I rarely watch Smackdown and only catch Raw every once in a while. There are too many things about wrestling today that pale in comparison to the Monday night wars era. Wrestling will never be out
of my system completely. Though I don’t watch on TV very often, I catch most of the live shows that come to the DC area. Watching a live event is absolutely amazing. Though I have been to 23 events, I still get really excited like it was the first time every time!. Wrestling is the best combination of sports, humor, music, drama, and women ever. There has never been, nor will there ever be another spectacle like wrestling!!!!!

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The Experiences keep rolling in, and dare I say it, they keep getting better. You want your chance? Well, you can have it. All you have to do, is do what dozens of people have already done, and send in your best response to one or both of the following statements.

1. Why I am a wrestling fan.
2. How I got into pro wrestling.

Keep them coming, and remember, the next Experience could be yours.

Links For Fun And Nonprofit

The Ted Dibiase to my IRS (I don’t know, it just came to me that I’ve never recognized Money Inc in this spot before) had the Saturday news report as he winds down to his deserved hiatus.

Carapola debuts his Sunday news report. This kid’s going places. Just think of people who’ve been in the Sunday slot before: Me, Csonka…um…okay, well that’s still two good ones.

From the glowing box, Slimmer has Heat, Larry has Hogan Knows Best, Dunn, Furious, and Borchardt have Smackdown, and Byers and Larry have Impact.

JT and a Host of Others have Hidden Highlights.

Clark has The Shimmy.

Linkous has WWE vs TNA

Scotty Flamingo starts his TNA Adventure.

Ari has Column of Honor.

Carapola has Friendly Competition.

Feltham has the Quick Talkdown.

And Larry pays respects to Bam Bam Bigelow.

The Gab Bag

Manu Bumb writes in, and among other things, he mentions that he’s lost all faith in old school wrestlers since reading that apparently Arn Anderson and Fit Finlay had CM Punk’s push killed because he got over on a fluke and Holly deserved the push more since he’d been wrestling longer. He sums it up in one perfect statement: “Does it matter HOW they got over? Over is over, period.”

I have to say, killing the push of someone who was actually over with the live crowds seems monumentally stupid to me, but I can’t say I’m horribly shocked. From the days of Hogan, to the Cliq sabatoging Bret Hart, to Triple H changing his match finishes, there is a shocking amount of “me first” attitude in wrestling, and I don’t ever see it changing. Strangely, despite Punk’s streak ending last week to Holly, Punk was the one on TV in a feature match this week, and I don’t seem to recall ol’Bob doing much of anything. So maybe it was just a momentary brain fart by Creative. At least, I have to believe that.

Robert Toskey wonders why I’m surprised that the Bushwhackers would be Hall of Fame candidates. Okay, I recognize that they were incredibly popular comedy faces in WWF, and an incredibly hardcore team before that as the Sheepherders. I can just think of at least a dozen other tag teams I’d induct in a Hall of Fame before I’d consider them for inclusion. I realize it’s Vince’s toy and all that, but it’s not a complete sham, so to me, you’d have to consider teams like the Midnight Express, the Rock and Roll Express, Demolition, LOD, The British Bulldogs, and The Andersons, to name a few, before you get to the Bushwhackers.

And Jeff Bathurst has some interesting wrestling trivia for us all.

“I’m from Montreal, and when TNA plays in french, it’s none other than Pierre-Carl Ouellette (remember that wrestler?) on commentary. They translate what wrestlers say and make jokes with it. It’s really bad. Also in the end they always have a guy who comes up and informs us of independant show that will be around but the funny thing is when WWE is in town they tell it. Like when RAW was coming to Montreal they informed us about it…remember, it’s a TNA show!”

Also, he supports Batista/Taker at Mania, but wants Kennedy to win Money in the Bank, then win the title that night. I think it’s really too early for Kennedy, maybe by the end of this year he’ll be hot enough to consider it. And for a Mania surprise, if there has to be one, I want to see…oh come on, you know what I want to see. I want some heel in the ring, maybe Umaga and Estrada, talking about whatever, and I want the pregnant pause, and I want…say it with me…

“If ya smellllll….”

The place would come unglued, I promise you.

And One To Go On

The Burning Crusade has come, and despite Illidian’s warnings, I was well prepared. I did end up standing at Future Shop at 6 in the morning, by the way, which was a good plan, because my online pre-order got massively delayed, and by getting there early (no, I didn’t stay overnight, at least…give me some credit), I was fifth in line and scored a Collector’s Edition. Hey, I had a gift card, it was half price to me. And a week later, I fear I may be totally addicted a video game for the first time ever.

Yes, yes, I’m a nerd. Get over it.

411 will have live coverage of Raw starting tonight at 9 pm EST. Larry and his “big” announcement will be in tomorrow, you might not want to miss it. Or miss it, I’m sure it’s not that important. I’ll be back next week, and you definitely shouldn’t miss that.