The MeeThinks Saturday Spectacular 04.14.07

Rock & roll.

General Wrestling News

Disco Inferno To Face Felony Gambling Charges
Former WCW Star Busted for Running High-Stakes Poker Game, Cocaine

In case you missed this one, here’s the short form, courtesy of 11Alive news out of Atlanta:

Investigators said they were running a high-stakes poker game out of a home on Nesbit Ridge Drive, with a $10,000 buy-in. Officers said they seized $45,000 in cash and cocaine from the home.

Here’s the even shorter form: Disco’s an idiot, and he deserves everything he gets.

Even though it might *technically* be against the law in many places, MeeThinks you’d be hard-pressed to find many people who’d disagree with the notion that gambling for a few bucks here and there between friends is really a “crime” in the most literal sense of the word. Heck, low-stakes games on private property with no cut off the top for the house? There’s PLENTY of upstanding, otherwise law-abiding citizens who’ll happily indulge in such behavior from time to time (I should know — some of my regular poker buddies include a friar, a priest, a cop, and an aspiring lawyer).

But a weekly game with a TEN GRAND buy-in? That’s just ASKING for trouble, folks. Couple that with the fact that your little poker game just so *happens* to double as a throughfare for coke, and you’ve pretty well written the prosecution’s case for them (which reminds Mee — I have jury duty next Wednesday, actually).

So to summarize: High-stakes gambling is dangerous and risky. Drugs are even MORE dangerous and risky, and Glenroy “Disco Inferno” Gilbertti is a moron. Lesson here? It doesn’t take an overdose for addictions to ruin people’s lives.

WWE Nixes Lawler vs. Hogan Rematch in Memphis
Big Show“The Giant” Paul Wight Takes King’s Spot vs. The Hulkster Instead

Oh boy.

First of all, folks, this is nowhere NEAR as big a story as everybody and their brother in the IWC is making it out to be. Paul Wight called “Big Show” his WWE “slave name!?!” Hogan says his fans are “bigger than WWE’s?!” Lawler threatening to quit WWE?!? Let’s put things in perspective, here:

1) This is hardly the first time WWE and Hogan have had a falling out.
2) This is hardly the first time Hogan has tried an “upstart” promotion to get back at WWE.
3) This is hardly the first time Lawler has quit/threatened to leave WWE.
4) Lawler (though a certifiable “Hall of Famer”) is DECADES past relevant outside of Memphis.
5) Hogan (though likewise a “Hall of Famer”) is famous for having a dellusional ego.
6) Big Show and Hogan go way back, so it’s logical that Show would help a brother out, brother.
7) This is NOT Antonio Inoki vs. Hulk Hogan in 1983 we’re talking about, folks.
8) It’s a SLOW news week for the IWC — so this one gets the most press by default.

Long story short —

Hogan’s still sore at WWE for not paying him buttloads to come “steal the show” at WrestleMania 23 this year, so he’s whining to whoever will listen about just how crappy and unfair WWE is treating him and those close to him. WWE, meanwhile, is still sore at Hulkster for letting the cat out of the bag about this year’s Hall of Fame class, and so they’re taking their proverbial ball and going home by not leasing out WWE talent to compete on a show specifically designed to put money in Hulkster’s pockets. Lawler’s caught in the middle, because his job with WWE is cush (and great money), but he doesn’t wanna’ piss of Hogan and company along the way.

But let’s be honest here, people…

Even if Jerry Lawler *was* booking the match between himself and the Hulkster — do you REALLY think Hulk “Too Expensive For WrestleMania” Hogan is going to agree to show up only to LOSE in an increasingly-obsolete wrestling territory like Memphis (who’s long ceased to be a major playor in the North American pro wrestling market)? Hogan rarely loses, folks… and if and when he DOES lose, he either does so for BIG BUCKS on a BIG STAGE or he does so for BIG BUCKS on a stage that nobody’s likely to ever hear about (that way it doesn’t hurt his “legacy”), kinda’ like when he jobbed cleanly to Jaques Rogeau — yes, THAT Jaques Rogeau — at a WWF non-televised house show almost twenty years ago.

Point being:

Hulk Hogan wrestling a “bigger than WWE” media-sensation supercard in Memphis against a fellow “Hall of Famer” like Jerry Lawler (whom Hogan’s never beaten, by the way)? If he thinks people will be talking about it (and he’s right), then you’re virtually guaranteed to see the red and yellow walk out of the night with his hand held high.

In other words:

The loss of a “dream match” like Hogan/Lawler in the year 2007 is actually the better part of a quarter century past its relevance. Lawler will whine that WWE strongarmed him out of a major payday in Memphis, but odds were pretty good that The King was only showing up to lose anyhow, so don’t expect him to be *too* upset with WWE for keeping him one up on The Immortal One. Hulk, meanwhile, will tell you this is the start of his latest “screw WWE and go out on my own terms” farewell tour, but since we’ve heard that sort of talk from the Hulkster time and time again for YEARS now — do take it for what it’s worth.

As for Hulk/Big Show“The Giant” Paul Wight?

Should draw a decent crowd, for sure… but when you look back to the “glory days” of WCW, it’s not like we haven’t seen these two go at it already, ya’ know. And though it’ll be interesting to see who all gets their feelings hurt and who all walks away from this one with the bigger axe to grind against big brother WWE in the end — realistically, this little newsbitty nugget is really nothing more than a “mild interest” placeholder until the IWC can latch onto the latest WWE release, Wellness suspension, drug bust or Russo blunder.

So do yourselves a favor, wrestling fans — don’t get too worked up over the latest Hulk Hogan hubub. Love him though I do, this one simply doesn’t rank all that high up there on the “earth-shattering” news fronts, ya’ know?

WWE News

King Booker Out Through June
Injury Angle Worked to Allow Time Away for Knee Rehab

The good news in all this is that Booker’s estimated rehab time is expected to be relatively brief. And with a late June return in the works, the end of Booker’s sabbatical will really help start the summer of 2007 off on a high note. Just think, in three months’ time WWE fans should be seeing the return of (roughly in order) King Booker, Mark Henry, Rey Myterio, and Triple H. Mark Henry aside — the remaining three men are each proven draws, and even when you take Henry in with the mix, this relatively “fresh” batch of talent will really help liven things up as WWE rolls into SummerSlam with a certifiable crop of revitalized main eventers to help Orton, Edge, Cena, Batista, Lashley and The Undertaker change things up a bit as the summer wears on.

Sure, Triple H, Rey Mysterio and Booker T have all had more than their fair share of time in the spotlight — but thanks to the timely (and practically simultaneous) returns of four (ok, three and a half) big name stars coming back from injury, WWE is sitting pretty with a boatload of established (and HEALTHY!) top-level performers that should be tremendously effective in “shaking things up” this summer.

So get well soon, Booker — we’re looking forward to seeing more from you in the months to come!

YouThinks Reader Survey: The Return!

Well last week we came up with a reader survey that was met with a pretty sweet degree of success, so MeeThinks this week’s relatively “light” newsload is all the more reason to offer up more of the same. Basically, we’re taking what might have otherwise been an easily-overlooked news byte and turning it into a reader-response question, and we need YOU to cast your vote to bring this sucker home!

This week’s news-nugget-turned-reader-poll:

Last week, WWE released a web-exclusive collection of wrestler entrance theme songs, creatively titled “WWE The Music: Volume 7.” Now this isn’t the part of the column where we whine about what songs SHOULD have been on there and which ones SHOULDN’T have (pretty useless at this point, really)… but instead, we’re sizing up which of these tracks is superior to the others purely on the basis of THEMESONG GREATNESS alone.

So this week, it’s the battle of the undercard comedy tag-teams, as Cryme Tyme’s theme music “Bringin’ Th Hood 2 U” takes on Deuce and Domino’s “Greasers” theme!

Here’s the lyrics of each track so you can compare the two:

Alright folks, so which of these two songs (not the teams themselves, just their entrance themes!) is the better of the two? VOTE NOW!!!

Results next week!

YouThinks Reader Mail

As many of y’all know, last week’s column featured the second of two e-mails allegedly hailing from none other than former WWE/ECW “superstar” (in the loosest sense of the word) Andrew “Test” Martin. Since both e-mails were remarkably different in tone, style and overall readability (and since actual news items were a bit sparse last week) — I decided to put this one to a vote and see what YOU, the readers, thought about these suspect e-mails from our favorite former extremist.

As you’ll recall, e-mail numero uno featured a TON of spelling, grammar and punctuation errors — and it sounded as if it was written by a 14-year-old boy just learning how to use a keyboard for the first time.

The secont e-mail was a bit more respectful and articulate, though it did share many of the same criticisms of the first e-mail that preceded it. But anyhow…

With just about 800 votes cast in last week’s column, here’s the results of the first ever YouThinks Reader Survey!

The first letter (with the bad spelling) is from the “real” Test. 2%

The second letter (with the good spelling) is from the “real” Test. 28%

Both letters are from the “real” Test, and he’s just trying to save face. 10%

Niether letter is from the “real” Test. 60%

Well there you have it folks. By an overwhelming majority, it looks like YouThinks our pal Andrew “Test” Martin has not, in fact, been so kind as to grace this humble column with his superstar presence over the past two weeks. Color Mee bummed. Perhaps this survey suggests that many folks aren’t convinced that a “big star” like Test would take the time to read and reply to a humble little web column like this one. On the other hand, this might instead suggest that many readers out there simply doubt that our pal Andrew actually knows how to use a computer in the first place.

Hiyo!

I kid, I kid…

Seriously, though — thanks to all who voted and e-mailed (including at least ONE “fake” Test impersonator, it would seem). Your feedback is greatly appreciated, and since so many folks took the time to vote and send TheirThinks my way, I’m pretty sure we’ll throw a few more surveys into future columns on down the line. Kinda like the one above!

So thanks again to all those who chimed in, and now… more letters!Chris Jacobs gets us started:

I like that Im not the only one that notices that people complain just for the sake of complaining, you cant please anyone anymore. Damned if ya do, damned if ya don’t, Im glad someone else notices this stuff, I wish people would just shut up and enjoy it, cause if wrestling went all completley off the air, all these wrestling haters would complain to no ends for one of two things, they really REALLY miss the product that they hate so bad, or they don’t have anything to complain about anymore. Im tirde of complaining over people that complain, HA, so keep up the good work, like the whole article, just wanted to point this out.

Oh yeah – Matt Sydall used to be in TNA, so I wouldn’t think it is too much of a stretch for him to come back, as for the Test note, didn’t the real test just talk in the media about not being paid more than a regular 9-5 job? Also I think the real Test could come up with a better way to end an email than BIATCH!!!, oh, and what does (sic) mean?

– Chris Jacobs

PS: I think the second one is him, the first one sounds like some kind of middle school-minded person ranting. I didn’t get to read your message that supposedly sent him off, can you send a copy to me by chance, or a link to the page it is on.

Thanks for writing, Chris! Sounds like you pretty well covered four basic points, so I’ll do my best to field what you’ve asked my way.

1) You’re absolutely right that many members of the Internet Wrestling Community simply whine for the sake of doing so. You know, kinda’ puts themselves over at the sake of the product in the whole — that way they can feel “cooler” than your average Joe-rasslin’ fan simply because they are “connoseiurs” the product whereas the hoi polloi just “consumers” of it. To people like that I say, “lighten up” — it’s pro wrestling, people. Enjoy it for what it is.

2) Matt Sydall did, in fact used to be a TNA’er. But since he jumped ship on them, I marked him down for a “questionable” return to the promotion, simply because I’m not entirely sure as to what all the terms between the two camps were like when they went their separate ways a few years back. “Never say never,” I know — but it’s always good to take a cue from history when trying to predict the future, ya’ know?

3) “Sic” is an editing mark used (in layman’s terms) when a writer quotes somebody else who they know has misspoken, misspelled, or mispronounced something. It’s basically a *good* writer’s way of saying “the dude I’m about to quote here has totally botched this sentence, but rather than change what they said I’ll just point it out that *I* know the correct saying/spelling they were going for.” Kinda like how mainstream media outlets like to quote President Bush for having said “Nuke-u-lar (sic) weapons” — they know the right pronunciation of the word, they’d just rather draw attention to the man’s mistake as they revel in how goofy the guy looks for having said it wrong in the first place.

Kinda’ like Mee and “Test,” really. 😉

4) As for what I said that set the poor fella (or some guy claiming to be him) off? My guess is it was this little rant, from a few weeks back:

Andrew “Test” Martin Released from WWE
ECW’s “Impact Player” Ends Second Tenure With the ‘E

Bwahahahahahaha.

Well it’s about time, eh? I called Test being canned from the ‘E way back in December — and I am more than happy to see that the company decided to dismiss the roided-up chipmunk in favor of actually giving screen time to more ongoing, competent, and altogether entertaining (heck, some might even say “worthwhile”) performers and storylines in lieu of giving Test yet another opportunity to underwhelm.

Now then, if anyone *really* thinks Test leaving the company has nothing to do with WWEllness — hate to say it, but you’re due for a massive reality check.

Make no mistake about it, folks — WWE had cut their losses with Test MONTHS ago. Simply put, the guy couldnt keep his act together and became a liability once he got nailed for repeatedly violating their drug policy (the same policy you’ll recall that he BEGGED WWE to enstate following the death of Eddie Guerrero, btw). Once it was clear that Test couldn’t be trusted to stay clean and out of the company dog house, he was placed on Bobby Lashley job patrol in order to get what little value out of the guy they had left before (as Bret Hart once so eloquently put it) “taking him out back and putting a bullet in his head — just like a circus animal.”

Now then, the second the company used up Test’s “cred” (and we’ll use that term loosely) as an on-screen punishment for his offscreen behavior? Presto — suspension. A mistimed auto accident later (colliding with a PARKED CAR, no less) and it seems all too clear that Mr. Martin had worn out his second welcome with the company… especially now that they’ve got Snitsky playing the exact same role that they’d given to Test just six months ago.

Put all the pieces together, and you’re staring at a clear case of “you wanna leave, eh? good. Don’t let the door hit ya in the ass on the way out.”

Which leaves us with the sad facts of the matter on this one:

1) You can be SURE that WWEllness played a huge factor in Test’s “resignation.” Which is good, because that means the program is still in effect (even if its exact details and applications are uneven, at best).

2) ECW is better off without Test. The guy was given a second lease on his WWE life to help add some “established performer” cred to the new brand, but all Test did (kinda like Angle, Sabu and Van Dam before him, actually…) was buckle under the pressure and make himself a liability to the company by (once again) putting “wrestler” and “drug user” at the front and center of the public eye.

3) Sucks to see somebody flake out like that, but in truth — Test was never really any great shakes in the ring. His physique, while “impressive” did little to hide the fact that he was really nothing more than a glorified midcarder, and MeeThinks the television time the ‘E was spending in a desperate attempt to make fans buy Test as a certifiable “main event” heel only wound up making the new ECW brand look all the less credible by its association to him.

Now that he’s gone, MeeThinks we’re much better off seeing all those efforts go towards a more worthwhile cause like building new angles, ongoing storylines, and credible (and DEPENDABLE) main eventers — all of which we’ve gradually begun to see from ECW in the past few weeks.

Hope this helped, Chris. And thanks again for reading!

Next up, Lyndon MacLeod:

Greetings from Canada. Regular reader, first time writer. You asked people to chimein on opinions regarding the e-mails supposedly from Andrew “Test” Martin in recent weeks.

The first e-mail from “Test” is without a doubt no more than a wanna-be (make that a never gonna be) who needs to get himself outside a bit more and cut back on fantasizing about the women on tv he would have no chance in hell of ever getting with.

The second e-mail from your last column, however, sounds to be much more likely to be the genuine article. I base this on how the e-mail sounds compared to the occasional blog post from the official Test site I have read in reports here at 411.

If the second e-mail was indeed from Mr. Martin then it would not be too surprising if he will be checking back on your response. If so I would like to say to him at no time was there any sort of harm wished upon you. It was a simple expression of hope that you are not overdoing them and that we won’t see your name among the growing list of wrestlers whose death was related to using them.

That’s it from me, keep up the great work!

– Lyndon MacLeod

Thanks for writing, Lyndon. You make a very good point (and one worth reiterating) — as you can see from my original post, never once did I wish harm or ill upon the guy. What I said (as you pointed out) was that drugs are dangerous and stupid, and that performers who use, abuse and/or depend on controlled substances in order to perform should be VERY careful, as they’re quite literally taking their lives in their hands with every injection. If the second e-mailer was, in fact, Andrew “Test” Martin — all b.s. aside, I seriously hope the guy is smart enough to realize that much, as reading and writing about drug overdoses and premature wrestler deaths is really quite a sad reality of being a wrestling fan these days. So yeah, your sentiments are quite on the mark — thanks again!

On a similar note, here’s a letter from Diggy:

Hey John love your work, great column

I think what you said about “Test” was perfectly legitimate and also bloody funny.
However I also reckon that the second email may have actually been from the real Test (not really going off anything other than it sounded rather realistic in tone).

If this is the case I actually gianed a bit of respect for the man, even though I never enjoyed him as a performer. If the 2nd email was written by the real Test then I must say I was impressed by the way he responded, hell he even praised your passion for the business!

In saying that I gotta say I also love the passion you show for wrestling, I’m not a hardcore wrestling fan as such but it’s great to see that you have something you hold so dear.

So cheers for the top writing and great entertainment, keep it coming!

– Diggy

Thanks for the support, Diggy. Guess we’ll never know whether or not “Test” ever did really pay a visit our way — but I’d like to think that even if he didn’t, at least a few of us learned a few things about the wrestling business, drug abuse, and wrestler safety along the way. Pot-shots, name-calling and lowblows not withstanding — it really is the intent of this column to “stay positive” on the product and its performers, and its my sincere hope that even when we’re forced to focus on the “bad” stuff, we learn a little more about how better to appreciate and enjoy this crazy pseudo sport and its stars along the way.

So “Test,” Test… whoever you are: thanks for giving us a chance to “come clean” on the steroid issue. Drug abuse in pro wrestling is a real problem, alright, and has been for a long time — perhaps raising awareness and changing fan expectations is the first step towards curbing this dangerous and all-too-common trend.

Finally, we’ll close with a letter from the always respectful (but often controversial) Matthew Alan Roberts:

Dear Sir:

Thank you for printing my feedback in your latest column. I was being sincere in complimenting you in my last message and in bashing Testicles (I just despise him). I enjoy your column and your crowd plant hottie (if I get rich I am hiring her to follow me around and get people whipped up for me). It looks like we both got our Wrestlemania predictions wrong since I agreed with you on all your picks (though I was happy to be wrong about Benoit and the ECW Originals).

You are right that I think neither message that was sent to you came from Testicles. If 1 of them hade to be real I would guess the second 1 was (Testicles might have had his trained helper monkey type it since he is intellectually challenged). If Testicles wanted to respond to you I think he has a My Space page and / or a web site to do it on (that was where he used to bash the McMahon clan before he got hired again). If Testicles did not like what you wrote he would probably ignore it because most wrestlers like to work that they do not read the internet (though most of them do).

Now, I have a few thoughts on this column.

1. I do not think Colt Cabana will do much in the WWF (I refuse to give in to the pandas and use the E). I am not saying anything bad about his ability I just doubt the uncreative team will be able to figure out what to do with him (see also Brent Albright). Colt Cabana has been around for a while (he did train Punk) and the WWF never signed him before. It is telling though that Colt and most of the ROH guys are working hard to take a slim shot in the WWF and are not viewing TNA as much of an option after how TNA wasted Joe and ruined Jay Lethal.

2. Carlito is shoot pissed about being left off Wrestlemania and being stuck as a dopey face, and his interview was a shoot. WWF will now try to turn it into a work (like the Botchtista / Booker shoot fight) to try to get people to think it was all a work. The telling things that make it clear the interview was a shoot was that Carlito complained about being a face (nobody ever mentions the uncreative process in a work) and he dumped on Khali (nobody is allowed to mention how crappy Ace / McMahon’s jerk off project is). I think he added the “even more disrespect” line in as a joke though it really is a shoot comment because young stars like Carlito and Nitro need that Wrestlemania exposure more than Flair.

3. Ric Flair will retire after Wrestlemania 24 (for his twentieth retirement). He will go into the Hall Of Fame next year. Flair will be off television for 3 months, come back as a general manager for 2 months, and then be back wrestling full time by Royal Rumble 2009. Flair is broke, has the I.R.S. (not Mike Rotundo) after him, and a young trophy wife who is digging for more gold than all the 49ers (not the football team) combined, so Flair is never going to stay retired (the McMahons know it, which is why they are really not buying into the retirement tour deal).

4. My bet on the Summerslam match for McMahon is that it will be the match with him and Foley that he has wanted to do for 6 years (Wrestlemania 17 was supposed to be Foley / Vince and not Shane / Vince). They will work the match off of the recent crap Foley book (Hardcore Diaries was a hardcore disappointment to me) where Foley bashes Vince (the only person he bashes in the book is Vince). If it is Rey versus Vince, then it is a terrible idea and a rotten match. Rey needs to be put over real wrestlers (and Umaga) when he comes back to get his heat back and make people forget about him being the jobber World champion because he can still draw as a main eventer, but he is getting older.

5. For WSX I say good riddance to bad rubbish as I watched it for a few minutes and was not enthralled with it (I can watch the Russo show for flippy dippy spot fests that mean nothing). There will be no DVD box set because MTV owns the rights, not Big Vision, and they see no money in it. Teddy Hart will go to the WWF where he will last 2 weeks then get turfed out like he was the third member of the Public Enema, but none of the other guys are going any place. Sean Waltman refuses to stay clean even after Hunter paid for his rehab, Jack Evans already did stuff with TNA and they were not terribly hot for him, and Jesus got dumped from the WWF after being buried by Cena so none of them are going to be on anybody’s wrestling radar.

Sincerely,

– Matthew Alan Roberts

Thanks for the letter, Matt. Let’s jump right into your points in order, yes?

1) Though we might disagree on this one, I still believe that Colt Cabana, if used right, could easily fit into WWE upper-midcard “comedy heel” role once occupied by Christian. He’s a great worker and has always proven willing to take a bump (or a beating) or get himself punked out (“Punk”ed out?) to help put over his fellow employees, so I see no reason why, if given the chance, Colt couldn’t do the same in WWE. I’m not saying he’ll be a world champion or anything, but he could totally carve a niche if given the proper opportunity. Now as for where he could make the greatest impact — ECW seems like the most logical brand, given that it’s still pretty much the most “developmental-friendly” program of the three (i.e., newer stars get the chance to shine and adapt to “WWE Style”).

2) I’m not doubting that Carlito was, in fact, sore about being left off ‘Mania — but as we saw last week on RAW, what he said in his Edmonton interview was a perfect dovetail with the direction his character has taken since then, so I’ve got a pretty solid gut feeling that what he *said* and what he *feels* (while obviously related to a certain degree) are pretty much all well within the permissable field of what’s been put forth his way by the creative geniuses behind WWE’s backstage curtains. Let’s be honest — a WWE performer runs to the mainstream media and “breaks character” right before the company’s biggest show of the year? Guaranteed disciplinary action, depush, onscreen burial and/or termination to follow.

But instead, what have we seen? The guy’s getting a push, he’s obviously going back to being a heel (as he’d teased in the interveiw), and he’s clearly being pitted against a bona-fide LEGEND in order to seal the deal. Was he pissed about being left off ‘Mania? No question. But just like Mick Foley has so famously said on many occassion — the best heels derive their character’s inspiration from the performer’s real-life feelings, and in order for a heel to truly connect with an audience he absolutely must believe that his CHARACTER’s actions are justified. Carlito’s doing a fine job of blurring the line between “character” and “performer,” and working mainstream media outlets is just another example of how the guy is doing whatever he can to get himself over.

3) I’m inclined to believe we’re seeing the last “full-time” days of Ric Flair in a WWE ring, but as to whether or not he’ll ever actually retire on a permanent basis? Not likely. Guys like Flair are from the “Old School,” and few of them ever have the luxury, the priveledge, or the inclination to walk away until they simply can’t go any more. Terry Funk is still wrestling, Hulk Hogan is still wrestling, Roddy Piper just got through with cancer and is hoping to wrestle again, Mick Foley (who swore he’d *really* retire) still wrestles two matches a year, and heck — even Andre The Giant was pretty much wrestling (or involved with it) until the day he died. Point blank — barring serious injury or death, Ric Flair (like Hulk Hogan) will wrestle YEARS after he earns a WWE Hall of Fame induction. Maybe not a full-time schedule, but while you can surely take “The Dirtiest Player In The Game” out of the game, you simply can’t ever take “the game” out of “The Dirtiest Player” in it.

4) SummerSlam: I’d count on either Foley/McMahon or Mysterio/McMahon, as you’ve mentioned. Though Foley/McMahon would probably be a better fit in terms of in-ring styles, the bottom line is that using Vince McMahon (a non-wrestler) to put over another non-fulltime-wrestler (Foley) doesn’t seem to accomplish all that much these days. Foley’s as over as he’s gonna’ be, as is Vinny Mac, and pairing the two together doesn’t pay itself off with any new stars being made in the process. Mysterio, on the other hand, is a full-time performer but damaged goods after a craptacular title reign. If he’s going to come back full-time, he’s definitely going to need a few big wins to help fans remember that he was ever more than a kid-friendly “sympathy champion” some 12 months ago.

5) Wrestling Society X is a mixed bag. Yes, it was cartoonish and awkward at times — but then again, TNA and WWE can be pretty darn laughable at times, too… at least WSX had a pretty decent sense of humor about itself, ya’ know? As for the flippy-flop spotfests, WSX certainly demonstrated that it had a capable crop of “stuntmen” and “acrobats” on their roster — and believe it or not, there actually *IS* a market for guys like this to make a pretty solid name for themselves in a mainstream North American wrestling promotion these days. The key to this thing (as in all things) is MODERATION, as a show full of stuntmen taking insane bumps pretty well desensitizes your audience to the impact of these things. But if only one or two matches each week are used in a stuntman/spotfest capacity? Hey, it worked for Nitro’s cruiserweight division for YEARS… and that’s where a number of the WSX alumni could well find employment.

Guys like Evans and Sydal are perfect examples of this sort of thing. Teddy Hart has a good look (and a good “name” connection) enough to earn at least a shot in the “big leagues), as does Aaron “Jesus” Aguilera (hey, WWE *did* re-sign Test, ya’ know). And Sean Waltman is well-connected enough in the business to land on his feet provided he can kick whatever habit he’s caught himself up in (never say never — guys like Shawn Michaels, Eddie Guerrero AND Jeff Hardy were all re-signed after YEARS of various “addictions” ya’ know).

As for the WSX box set — MeeThinks you can bank on it. It’s almost a formality that (quite literally) EVERY SINGLE SHOW EVER MADE seems to land itself at least one season’s worth of a boxed set these days. And even if the show wasn’t particularly lucrative or successful — as George senior once told Mee, “there’s always money in the banana stand.” And DVD box sets are the banana stand of the 21st century.

On that note, though…

And With That, I’m Outta’ Here…

Thanks again for reading, all. Sorry we were short (again!) on actual news and rumors this week. Consider it the calm before the storm, though, as we’ve got Lockdown this weekend and a boatload of fallout likely in the days that follow. Not to mention the inevitable deluge of readers who are bound to be sore that C.M. Punk joined the New Breed, eh? Anyhow — enjoy the PPV tommorrow (I was too late for the roundtable, so I’ll just say: VKM, Roode, Daniels, Senshi, Gail, Storm, Sabin, LAX, and Team Cage), here’s hoping we can get a break from all this less-than-springy weather we’ve been seeing, and always stay positive!

– Meehan