The Custom Made News Report 07.08.07

Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, to the second edition of the Custom Made News Report. Last week was a hell of a time to debut this column, so let me make a few introductory notes that I felt would have been out of place seven days ago given the relatively somber tone of internet.

Astin 3:16 Says: I’m in Trouble

Even though the coverage on CNN, Fox News, and wrestling websites has continued ad nauseum, there is little to no additional factual information that has been uncovered in the past few days as it relates to the sad story of Chris Benoit and his family. The story has now shifted from the fate of the Benoits to the fate of their doctor, Phil Astin. Astin was indicted on numerous charges earlier this week, all of them relating to prescriptions being made in a fraudulent manner, with one petition for a warrant to search his offices stating that he prescribed several months worth of steroids to Benoit every three to four weeks.

However, the link to the Benoit case is only where Astin’s troubles begin. They’re far from over. On Friday, the Atlanta Journal-Constitution reported that now federal authorities are investigating a possible link between Astin and the death of Mike Durham, better known to wrestling fans as Johnny Grunge. Grunge, who according to Dave Meltzer and Bryan Alvarez was Benoit’s neighbor and one of his closest friends over the last several years, first gained popularity in professional wrestling as half of the tag team Public Enemy in ECW. Public Enemy, known for its particularly violent style of wrestling, engaged in a notable feud with the Gangstas in ECDub before signing with WCW, where they became a comedic opening match act as opposed to the hardcore competitors that they had been in Philadelphia. They briefly held the WCW Tag Team Titles but otherwise did nothing of note before leaving the company after roughly a year and heading to the World Wrestling Federation. The team’s time in the WWF was brief to say the least, and it was the last opportunity Grunge would have to be in the national spotlight. He continued his involvement with professional wrestling on the independent circuit until passing away in February 2006.

Grunge’s death was caused in large part by his weight, which ballooned up to well over 400 pounds in his final few months on earth. However, there were prescription drugs in his system at the time, although not quite enough to kill him. Regardless, Grunge did receive at least one prescription from Astin, and Captain Mike Pruitt of the sheriff’s office in Fayette County, Georgia, has stated that the doctor is suspected of over-prescribing drugs to Grunge. Regardless of whether the suspicion proves to be true, Astin is already in a good deal of trouble, though additional charges would certainly not help his situation.

Smackdown Scores a . . .

The Smackdown rating was a 2.6 this week. Why anybody still cares about television ratings is beyond me. Trends in ratings could potentially have a great effect on WWE, but isolated numbers – as ratings are most often reported on the internet – mean next to nothing in 2007.

King and the Ring

CNN’s Larry King Live will focus entirely on the situation surrounding Chris Benoit and his family and the questions it raises about the wrestling industry Monday night at 9 PM EST. Currently scheduled to appear are Bret Hart, Chris Jericho, and John Cena. I know that last week I was a bit critical of the cable news media’s coverage of the Benoit story, but, quite frankly, this is probably the one place on television where you’re going to get meanginful discussion of the matter. Unlike many other prime time “news” programs these days, King’s show isn’t a thinly veiled television tabloid. It’s the product of a responsible veteran journalist who is attempting to actually inform his viewers about a particular subject. This isn’t going to be a five minute Hannity & Colmes segment with four different people yelling over each other for the duration of the interview. It’s going to be an hour of an intelligent, relatively well-informed news anchor asking questions that matter.

The quality of the show is already reflected in the guests that King has lined up for the program. Since the Benoit tragedy took place, it seems like every Tom, Dick, and Harry ever associated with pro wrestling has crawled out of the woodwork to get some cheap camera time. Men who have been out of WWE for years have been asked to comment on the current state of the company’s locker rooms, and people who only met Chris Benoit on a handful of occasions are answering questions about him that only his closest friends would know. However, on tomorrow night’s broadcast, the panel will consist of Bret Hart, Chris Jericho, and John Cena. Hart, as somebody who met Benoit before he even became a professional wrestler, will be able to give plenty of insight in to the early life of the man, as well as discussing WWE and its policies without having the bias of somebody who is currently working for the company (Cena) or who probably will be working for the company within the next five years (Jericho). Jericho, as one of Benoit’s closest friends, will be more capable of providing more personal background on the man and his family life than anybody else not currently under WWE contract. Finally, John Cena will be able to speak to WWE’s current drug testing policies, the current physical strain placed on wrestlers, and Benoit’s final days in the industry. This is the most competently selected panel of professional wrestlers to have appeared on a news show.

And, as an interesting side note, John Cena is the first WWE employee aside from Vince McMahon himself to make such a high profile comment on the company and the Benoit situation. I can’t imagine how much faith the promotion must have in this young man to allow him to go out there and talk about some very tricky topics on live television.

Stratus-faction on TV

Former WWE Women’s Champion Trish Stratus seems to be making some strides in her career outside of wrestling, which is great for her given what this industry tends to do to people after a while. Her latest project is Next Comedy Legend, a reality television show debuting on the Canadian Broadcasting Corporation’s CBC Television at 9 PM EST this coming Tuesday. The show, which is produced by the storied Second City comedy troupe, features aspiring actors competing to land a spot with Second City. Given that the troupe helped launch the careers of Dan Akroyd, John Candy, Mike Myers, and numerous others, the competition certainly does sound as though it could be a great jumping off point for a young, talented individual. In fact, it could be a great jumping off point for Stratus as well. The former wrestler has done some training of her own with Second City, attempting to fine tune her comedic skills for future acting gigs. Sadly, after the flop that was Armed and Famous, she probably needs all the help that she can get.

WWE Hits South of the Border

The Raw roster toured Mexico this past week, beginning on the good old Fourth of July and wrapping up last night. Rey Misterio made his return to the ring during the tour, primarily working in tag team matches and, according to reports, he looked as though he was in good shape. (It should be noted that, though he was on this Raw tour, the plan last I heard was still for him to return as a Smackdown wrestler.) From looking at the limited results that are available on the net, not much else of note happened on the shows, aside from former lucha libre stars Super Crazy and Val Venis getting the token wins that they normally get when WWE heads to the area and Cade & Murdoch working pretty regularly with Kendrick & London, perhaps foreshadowing Raw’s next Tag Team Championship feud.

R . . . V . . . D’OH!

According to WrestlingObserver.com, Rob Van Dam appeared at a memorabilia show in the United Kingdom on Saturday and ruled out a return to the ring for the time being, stating that he was taking a hiatus from all professional wrestling. Of course, he didn’t indicate how long this hiatus would be, but hopefully this will kill the incessant rumors about Van Dam headed to TNA Wrestling. However, given that this is the same internet on which some people think that Bret Hart is capable of an in-ring return after post-concussion syndrome and a stroke, I doubt that the scuttlebutt will stop scuttling.

Steiner Sails Home

Here’s a story that I’m surprised hasn’t gotten a bit more coverage. Most folks know that Scott Steiner missed the last TNA pay per view due to an injury, but very few people seem to know exactly what happened to the big guy. A little over a month ago, he was in a tag team match in Puerto Rico, when a kick from form TNA wrestler El Gran Apolo caught him in the throat and resulted in severe damage to the Big Bad Booty Daddy’s trachea. The injury was life threatening, and Steiner had to undergo surgery while still on the island. He has been stuck in a Puerto Rican hospital for an entire month to recover from the surgery, and he was just finally allowed to return home this past week according to F4W Online. He’s not even completely recovered, as evidenced by the fact that he was barred by doctors from flying back to the US mainland and had to take a ship in order to return home. I had originally heard that Scotty would be able to return to the ring in January 2008, though more recent reports have stated that it may be an entire year before he is capable of making a comeback. Given the University of Michigan alum’s age and prior record of injuries, this significantly shortens the relatively small amount of time he would have left in the ring before becoming physically incapable of competing.

I Don’t Think TNA Will Acknowledge This One

Last week, I mentioned that Kurt Angle defeated Brock Lesnar in the main event of the new Inoki Genome Federation’s first card. This resulted in Angle earning the second championship belt that he was hauling around on Impact this past Thursday, though he might not have that for much longer if New Japan Pro Wrestling gets its way. However, I’m not here to talk about the bad blood between NJPW and Inoki, the man who founded that company oh so many years ago. What I’m here to talk about is even greater.

For the past couple of years, All Japan regular and sometimes US indy wrestler NOSAWA (a.k.a. NOSAWA Rongai, a.k.a. El NOSAWA Mendoza) has been hosting the NOSAWA BOM BA YE, his own small show consisting primarily of comedy matches. The fourth show in the series took place on July 6 in Japan, and the main event was in fact a parody of the Angle/Lesnar match from the previous weekend. Kikutaro, a wrestler formerly known as Ebessan who is popular for parodying numerous other men in the sport, became Kiku Angle for one night only. His opponent was Muscle Sakai of the Dramatic Dream Team (DDT) promotion, who transformed in to Muscle Lesnar. Added in to the mix was former deathmatch wrestler Kintaro Kanemura, who was playing the role of “Josh Kintaro,” a supposed disciple of Josh Barnett. The three men had a match that went roughly nine minutes – only one minute shorter than the actual Angle/Lesnar match – and ended when Muscle botched the F-5 in such a way that Kiku Angle was able to pin him. After the bell, Kikutaro got on the mic and claimed to be the “real” IWGP Champion, much as Brock Lesnar had been doing despite the fact that the belt he carried was no longer officially tied to New Japan. He demanded a match with the actual IWGP Champion, Yuji Nagata, to settle the issue once and for all. It’s interesting to see that what Kurt Angle and TNA have been playing up as a legitimate, meaningful title win in the United States can be the source of so much mockery in Japan, the country where it took place.

Of course, mockery is to be expected on one of NOSAWA’s shows. After all, the second match on the card was billed as a “Sumo Wrestling versus Lucha Different Style Fight.”

Back in the News . . .

Those of you who don’t follow lucha libre regularly may or may not remember Mistico. He’s currently the biggest star (or at least one of the biggest stars) for Mexico’s CMLL promotion, and he started making waves on American wrestling sites in February/March of this year because there was talk of him going to WWE, which would have all sorts of interesting implications for wrestling south of the border. In fact, during one of WWE’s California shows, he received a tryout match with the company, which took place prior to any fans being let in to the building. Reports are that he worked against Dean Malenko and everybody was quite impressed with what Mistico could do . . . though nobody seemed to take in to account the fact that he was in there with Dean Malenko, who could make my five year old niece look like a great wrestler if he wanted to.

Now, a story making the rounds courtesy of F4WOnline.com states that Mistico’s contract with CMLL has recently expired, leaving the lucha star to work on a night-by-night basis. There is no word on whether WWE wishes to pursue him now that he is a free agent, though there may not necessarily be interest on Mistico’s end either given that he is making more money south of the border than he would in the States. However, a WWE contract would still result in significant cash for far fewer dates and a less physical style, which may also come in to play.

Virtually Unknown American Wrestler to Debut in Japan’s Largest Company

Pro Wrestling NOAH, the single hottest wrestling promotion in Japan these days, recently announced the lineup for its July 15 card in Tokyo. An interesting name popped up on that card . . . Thoruf. Though he’s a native of the US and has competed for various independent organizations in his home country, not many American wrestling fans are honestly able to say that they’ve heard of this man before. There’s limited information about him on the internet, but here’s what we do know: Thoruf Marius has primarily worked in Minnesota indies, though he has also taken the time to head down to Harley Race’s World League Wrestling, which operates primarily in Missouri. Because Race is highly respected in Japan, WLW and its training school often work with NOAH, and it is through this deal that Thoruf got the opportunity to both train in the foreign dojo and tour with Misawa’s promotion. He makes his NOAH debut in the aforementioned July 15 card in a six man tag, teaming with ROH wrestler Davey Richards and Akihiko Ito to take on Masao Inoue, Tsutomu Hirayanagi, and Ippei Ota. Those of you who want to take a look at Thoruf in action before footage of his Japanese work leaks over to the United States can watch the following video, provided by YouTube and Minnesota Championship Wrestling.

The Ayatollah of Shamrock n’ Rollah

Tonight, Chris Jericho is making what these days can be considered a rare pro wrestling appearance for Maryland Championship Wrestling. Jericho, though he won’t be competing, will be at the company’s annual Shane Shamrock Memorial Cup show. It takes place at 7:30 this evening at the North Point Flea Market in Dundalk, Maryland. Y2J showing up is obviously big news, but the real hook for the show is, as the name implies, a tournament honoring Shane Shamrock, a former MCW wrestler who was shot and killed in 1998. Prior to his death, Shamrock had just won the MCW Lightheavyweight Title in a six-way match, and the tournament plays off of that fact by requiring ten wrestlers to compete in singles matches. The winners of the singles matches, along with the previous year’s tournament winner, then fight it out in the six-way for the big cup. (And, yes, this is where ROH got the idea for “Survival of the Fittest.”)

This year’s tournament lineup looks like the best ever, and I’m not exaggerating. Though the first round pairings haven’t been announced, it is known that TNA stars Christopher Daniels and Jay Lethal will be a part of the lineup alongside Ring of Honor and Dragon Gate standout Matt Sydal. Rounding out the field are ECW and WWF developmental alum Christian York, WSX competitor the Human Tornado, and indy names Vordell Walker, Azriel, Eddie Edwards, and Derek Fraizer. Ruckus of CZW and WSX fame is last year’s winner of the Shane Shamrock Cup and will thus be involved in the finals. Appearing elsewhere on the card are Joey Mercury and Danny Doring. Ticket information is at MarylandWrestling.com.

So You Think You Can Wrestle?

If you’re on the west coast of the United States or Canada and have thought about getting in to professional wrestling – particularly professional wrestling on the level of WWE – you’ll have a unique opportunity to find out exactly what the company is looking for on August 11, 2007. The Buddy Wayne Wrestling School in Washington state will be hosting an eight hour training seminar with special guest Rip Rogers. For those not familiar with Rogers, not only is he a veteran of the sport, but he’s also one of the current trainers for WWE farm league Ohio Valley Wrestling, so he’ll be able to let you know exactly what the largest wrestling promotion in the world is looking for in terms of guys that they call up to be on television. The seminar is open to the first twenty enrollees and costs $100 a head. Both current independent wrestlers and fans contemplating a future in the business are able to sign up. More information can be found on the school’s website.

Walking with a Purpose

A bit of good news from the often maddening world of professional wrestling: Indy competitor Cheerleader Melissa is attempting to use her minor celebrity to raise money for a good cause. She’s participating in the 2007 AIDS Walk San Francisco, which every year attempts to gather donations for a whole slew of AIDS/HIV related charities. The walk is taking place on July 15 this year, and, up until that date, you can head to Melissa’s donation page and contribute some money to something a little bit more noble than buying the latest PWG DVD. Do you really need to see Pac that badly? No, you don’t. This means much more.

Before we head out, here are a couple of updates on stories that were mentioned here last week:

~ Chris Sabin defeated Shuji Kondo late last weekend to win All Japan’s junior heavyweight version of the Champion Carnival tournament. Sabin, who by all reports was a pretty big hit in his first AJPW tour, joins past tournament winners Kaz Hayashi and Carl Contini (aka Carl Malenko) in the history books.

~ Quick SHIMMER Results from last Sunday in Florida: Cindy Rogers def. Allison Danger in a two out of three falls match (two falls to one), Ariel def. Amber O’ Neal, Lexie Fyfe def. Daffney (Daffney appeared to hurt her knee during the match), Serena Deeb def. Malia Hosaka, Cheerleader Melissa def. Rain, Daizee Haze def. MsChif, Amazing Kong def. Nikki Roxx, Sara Del Ray def. Lacey to retain the SHIMMER Championship in its first defense. The main event was apparently in the thirty minute neighborhood and said to be excellent. The entire show was taped for DVD and will be available on ROHwrestling.com in the future.

And that does it for me. As stated earlier, I appreciate any and all feedback you wish to provide. Enjoy the rest of your weekend, and I’ll see you in seven.