Cut To The Crap 10.19.07: Pillman Gun Angle & The Shockmaster

First of all, I decided that I’m giving up with the WTATA e-mail address for feedback currently. While I use it, I occasionally have some difficulties reading and receiving e-mails. So from now on direct all feedback to my normal Yahoo e-mail address.

I have received some good as well as useful feedback this week, as I have made several mistakes that readers pointed out to me. First of all, my lack of knowledge on mid 1990’s WWF shone through as I said that Billionaire Ted was a parody of the NWO, when in fact it was done before the NWO came about, and was a parody of the older wrestlers who WCW were paying loads to wrestle for them.
Secondly, I said that Gillberg came in and faced Goldberg, but my memory went as Gillberg was in there with The Rock in a parody, then Goldberg attacked him, but The Rock stopped Goldberg delivering a lethal Chokeslam that would probably have ended Gillberg’s life for good.
I’m always one to correct my mistakes so thanks for the help. Remember, if you notice any mistakes in my column then let me know and I will correct.

And finally, reader Iain Sutherland wrote-

Just one thing about Heel JR though, how could you leave out his own personal commentary table?! I can’t remember the specific show but I do remember JR having his own mini version of the commentary table set up infront of King and Cole and him basically commentating over the top of them. Painfully silly but very memorable (for me at least!).

I missed this one, since it wasn’t on my DVD compilation, but I have to say that it sounds damn funny, and now I’ve heard about it I want to see it. Perhaps a reader could upload it to Youtube and I will include it in next week’s column. Although since I’ve not seen it I can’t be sure which show it was on.

This week I decided just to cover two items, as the Oddities-ICP video was just too weird and confusing for me to cover, and there’s no Youtube clip of it which would make it even harder to explain, so instead Ill cover the other two angles I was looking to cover-

Crappy Moment Number One: The Brian Pillman-Steve Austin Gun Angle
We all remember Brian Pillman, a loose canon who died too young, but had many great matches and feuds along the way. People may also remember his tag team with Steve Austin, the Hollywood Blondes. So when he joined the WWF they decided that having the two feud would be a good idea. And that lead us to this angle.

It started with Brian Pillman having his ankle shattered by Steve Austin with would be known in all future attacks of this type in professional wrestling as The Pillmanizer: he placed his ankle in between a chair and then jumped on it.

The next week, Brian is recovering at home with his wife. and is interviewed about the situation by Kevin Kelly. Pillman then cuts a part shoot promo talking about the bitter feuds he’s had in this business and how he wants to extract his revenge on Austin. Kelly then reveals to us that Austin is going around the area looking for him, but Pillman says he knows his strengths and weaknesses, and whips out a gun to show what he plans to do to Austin if he comes into his house.

After the break, Austin is shown outside brawling with a few of Brian Pillman’s friends. It seems really strange that Austin wasn’t able to run right through them straight away since he’s supposed to be one of the WWF’s biggest stars. It takes him well over a minute, if not two minutes to finish them off despite near drowning one of them and caving in the skull of another with a car door.

Austin then tries to enter right in the front door, but it is locked, so he goes round the back Meanwhile back inside Brian Pillman’s house, Brian is still holding the gun ready to shoot as Kevin Kelly shakily recaps the situation.

So Austin gets into the house the only way he knows how: by smashing the glass of the back door (it took him quite a while to get around there) and breaking down the door. As Austin runs in, Pillman wields the gun ready to shoot, but before we get to see whether he shot or not the feed dies.

We see the dead satellite feed several times, as well as a recap of what we saw. As we finally get back live, we see Pillman being restrained by five people to keep him in his seat and calm him down, with Austin nowhere to be found. Kevin Kelly then tells us (if you can hear him) that Austin is nowhere to be found and that nobody was shot. Steve Austin then returns for more but Pillman’s friends all run off of Pillman and restrain Austin. Who’s looking after Pillman? Well Pillman seems more interested in shouting “I’m going to kill him” anyway.
And what did Kevin Kelly do to help. Why he shouted “Call the police” about two million times. And then the show ends.

So this was pretty controversial stuff for it’s time (this was before the WWF really headed into the Attitude era). Pillman unfortunately died not too long after this angle, while Steve Austin went on to become one o the biggest stars of his generation. And the WWF apologised for this angle shortly after it happened.

There we have Crappy Moment Number One. Now let’s cover Crappy Moment Number Two to end this week’s column-

Crappy Moment Number Two: The ‘Legendary’ Debut Of The Shockmaster
Ah yes, this moment is certainly one that everyone who reads Wrestlecrap regularly looks down on as one of the worst, if not the worst debut in the entire history of wrestling. Few moments have been worse than this.

The WWF built up a wrestler called Typhoon in the early 90’s who wrestled alongside Earthquake in the team The Natural Disasters. But when he jumped ship to WCW, they of course couldn’t adopt his name. So they came up with something they thought would be even better. How wrong they were.

The Shockmaster would make his debut during an episode of Flair For The Gold, Ric Flair’s WCW talk show at Clash Of The Champions 24. Flair comes out with such a big tan that he almost looks like a black man. His guests on this show would be Sting and the British Bulldog, plus their “mystery partner”.

Sting and British Bulldog talk about Fall Brawl 1993 and War Games. And then Sid Vicious and Harlem Heat come out to make things even better. But then it’s time to reveal the mystery partner. And oh boy, what a mystery partner. Yes, according to Sting, this is somebody who’s “going to shock the world”. Why, because he’s the Shockmaster.

Of course the problem was this man’s entrance. There was a flash, and The Shockmaster proceeds to fall through the wall, and his mask FELL OFF. Yes, you read that correctly, his mask fell off, revealing who he was before he put it back on. In the background you can hear a cry of “Oh God” from Flair and a collective groan from the audience who fall into silence.

Sid tries to save this segment by shouting down The Shockmaster, but he was too late. And how could things get any more stupid. Why, with a dubbed in voice of course. And The Shockmaster seems to have a very deep, almost robotic voice, and the way he says his lines didn’t sound anything like the way they should have been said. There was no passion or conviction in the promo at all. And the heels were clearly trying to hold in their laughter at this stupid segment.
What did The Shockmaster say. He said “They call me The Shockmaster. You’ve ruled the world long enough, Sid Vicious. Get ready! Come on, you want a piece of me? You want a piece of me? Come and get me. Come after me, Sid! I’m ready.”

Of course, you can probably guess that The Shockmaster didn’t go down to well with anyone involved, and after a few matches the gimmick was abandoned. But the memory still remains as this still is to this day one of the worst moments in wrestling history.

And now that the crap has been picked up, put in a bag and thrown in the trash, we move on to some ROH related thoughts.

My Thoughts
The Human Tornado is coming to ROH on October 19th and 21st. The ROH message board has been pushing for him to get a shot for near two years now, and since the company was heading to California anyway it looks like this was the best time to give the fans what they want. I think Tornado’s a good wrestler who can regularly turn to comedy but can also get serious when the time occurs. He could be a good replacement for Colt Cabana in the comedy department, and if given a chance could become a great midcard wrestler.

Speaking of that, I have to applaud ROH for their work over the past two years in bringing to the company the wrestlers that people have been dying to see. Chris Hero, Larry Sweeney, El Generico, Kevin Steen, Mike Quackenbush, Jigsaw, Ruckus, Tyler Black and Necro Butcher were all people that the ROH fans really wanted in the company on a regular basis, and now they all have a strong place on the ROH roster. Chris Hero is the centrepiece of Larry Sweeney’s stable. El Generico and Kevin Steen have shone in a feud with The Briscoes, with Generico breaking through in the RTTT tournament while Kevin Steen has recently received a ROH title shot. Mike Quackenbush has stolen the show on many occasions with strong matches against some of ROH’s best. Ruckus and Jigsaw both has places in Jack Evan’s Vulture Squad and stole the show on both nights. And Tyler Black and Necro Butcher now are part of one of the company’s hottest angles, The Age Of The Fall, where they are in a blood feud with The Briscoes.
And indeed, many other top indy stars have received ROH tryouts over the past year: Josh Abercrombie, Eddie Kingston, Cheech and Cloudy, The YRR, Hallowicked, Gran Akuma and now Human Tornado and Tony Kozina. ROH’s future looks bright if all of these names become staples of the ROH roster in the not too distant future.

Unfortunately, the indy scene seems set to lose one of it’s top promotions at the end of the year with the closure of IWA-Mid South. I’ve seen a lot of people around the internet say unkind things about IWA over the past few months, and they are not deserved. This small promotions has worked hard for ten years to provide great wrestling, and sure they have made many mistakes along the way, but in the end hasn’t this promotion provided it’s fair share of memorable moments. With no IWA, there is no Ted Petty Invitational for a start, and PWG’s Battle Of Los Angeles doesn’t fill that gap. Many of the wrestling scene’s best have made their name in the IWA: CM Punk, Colt Cabana, Chris Hero, Ken Anderson, Austin Aries, Ace Steel, Matt Sydal and Delirious amongst others have past through the IWA ranks to move on to better things. So the indy scene and Midwest loses one of the best promotions for developing future stars, and AAW does not fill that gap. The indy scene will miss IWA, it has a massive legacy, and has done well to last this long, but it looks like at the end of this year we will have sadly heard the last of the IWA.

Anyway, thanks for reading this week’s column, and I hope you enjoyed it. Next week I will be looking at three more crappy wrestling moments, including Huckster vs Nacho Man, HBK loses his smile and Big Bossman casket surfs. Until next week, keep reading.