Banner by John Meehan
Good afternoon all and welcome to the greatest armchair booking column in the history of the Internet Wrestling Community, The Fink’s Payload.
I would hope that the majority of you are familiar with how this works by now, but if not, go here.
So without further ado, onto the 149th edition of The Fink’s Payload!
Last Week’s Homework: Survivor Series is coming up, so I want to do a few Survivor Series-themed homeworks in the next few weeks. Book a 5-on-5 Survivor Series Elimination Dream match, mixing and matching superstars from any company and any era. This one should produce a lot of fun entries.
We kick off this week with a Payload rarity – a contribution from another 411 writer! Dan Torkel wants to see to legendary factions go at it;
|
Hey man,
This is Dan Torkel, fellow 411 columnist who does Brooklyn Brawlin’. My column this week was how to re-introduce War Games into the world of wrestling. At Survivor Series I would love to see a wild War Games but I still love the classic 5 on 5’s. So if you want to book a DREAM MATCH 5 on 5 for Survivor Series why don’t we take the 2 stables that defined a generation, the 1980’s and the Four Horsemen, and the 1990’s and D-Generation X.
Ric Flair would lead Arn, Ole, Tully, and Barry Windham against Shawn Michaels, Triple H, X-Pac, Road Dogg and Mr. Ass Billy Gunn. JJ Dillon and Chyna are outside aiding their respective teams. We would get a long feeling out process between Ric Flair (circa 1986) and Shawn (circa 1997-98). Each combo would get some time to wrestle, Arn/Triple H, X-Pac/Tully, Ole/Road Dogg, Windham/Gunn. About 10 minutes of double teams and broken pins, The Andersons would take over on Road Dogg. He plays face in peril for awhile before hitting a double clothesline on Arn and Tully and diving to tag X-Pac. A wild brawl breaks out leading to the refs losing control as X-Pac hits Tully with the X-Factor. Arn dives in and destroys X-pac with the Gordbuster and rolls Tully on top for the first elimination. Horsemen up 5 – 4.
Before Tully can tag out, Triple H surprises him with a clothesline. On an irish whip, Hunter makes the blind tag to Shawn. Tully kicks him low and hits the Slingshot Suplex but stops to gloat and BOOM, Sweet Chin Music and we are tied at 4 on 4.
Flair goes after Shawn and catches another superkick attempt and works the leg. The Horsemen destroy his leg and Windham and the Andersons all prep for Flair’s Figure 4. Michaels kicks off the Figure 4 sending Flair to the post for a Flair Flop. Tag to Billy Gunn, and he is house of fire. Jackhammer, powerslam, and he preps for the FameAsser. JJ grabs his legs from outside causing Chyna to get involved. Windham sneaks in and bulldogs Gunn, leading to Flair scoring the pin making it 4 – 3 Horsemen.
Dogg comes in and its Juke and Jive and another Flair Flop. He goes for the Pump Handle but JJ draws Chyna’s ire on the outside again distracting the ref allowing Ole to clip Dogg’s leg and Flair gets the Figure 4 for the submission. Horsemen 4 – 2.
Flair and the Horsemen are laughing being up 4 – 2. Ole goes at it with Triple H and t his time Chyna gets the better of JJ as she rolls him in the ring. The ref gets distracted and misses a BLATANT Triple H low blow setting up a Pedigree and it is 3 – 2.
Windham blitzes a tired Hunter with his parented lariat. He, Arn and Flair keep Triple H in their corner as Shawn keeps trying to come in setting up double teams. Windham comes in and sets for the bulldog but Triple H pushes him into Sweet Chin Music from Shawn and Windham falls into a school boy roll up to eliminate Windham and tie at 2 – 2.
Triple H is exhausted and looks to tag but Arn catches him with the ANDERSON SPINEBUSTER and 1, 2, 3, Triple H is done and the Horsemen lead 2 – 1.
Shawn’s leg is wrecked from the previous Anderson stretching and Flair schooling. Arn goes for a spinebuster but Shawn hits the flying forearm and goes into his series leading him to tuning the band. He can barely stomp so he waits, but Arn ducks it and goes for the spinebuster but Shawn falls over the top and sunset flips Arn for the pin and we have Wrestlemania XXIV to determine the winner.
Flair clips a wounded Shawn and goes to school again. Figure 4 in the center of the ring. Shawn fights and crawls and gets the ropes. Flair drags him back to the center but Shawn kicks him into the ref. Sweet Chin Music and its a double KO. Shawn crawls for a pin attempt but the ref is out. Flair does his blatant low blow and struts but Chyna is in with a DDT on Flair. Another double KO. Flair is getting up slowly, and Michaels is tuning the band in the other corner. JJ pops up on the apron and BOOM, Sweet Chin Music to JJ Dillon! Flair takes the opportunity to roll up Shawn, hook the tights AND put his feet on the ropes to score the winning pin because he IS the dirtiest player in the game.
Final – Horsemen defeat DX – Sole Survivor: RIC FLAIR WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Take it easy man, Keep up the good work.
Dan Torkel
|
|
I can’t fault you for the idea; Horseman vs. DX is a Dream Match in every sense as the two are arguably the best two stables of all time, though I imagine the nWo would be challenging for that crowd as well.
I like the touch of adding JJ Dillon and Chyna into the mix as both were instrumental parts of making their respective stables so successful, but for my liking, they play too much into the outcome here. Obviously they are going to get involved, but I would have liked to have seen them both sent to the back to allow us to have Michaels and Flair go at it one-on-one at the end.
I think you got the order of elimination just about perfect, but I would say that it seems you’ve fallen into the trap of eliminations coming thick and fast, which can often weaken these kinds of elimination matches, in my opinion. I would also have had Flair have to overcome a 2-on-1 disadvantage against Triple H and HBK, as that in itself would have made for a great moment and given us some fantastic drama.
Overall, you have a great idea and really good execution, and there are just a few things I would alter, so thumbs up from me.
Next up is Bill Broderson, who takes it to another level;
|
I decided to go one step further on this Survivor Series Dream Match. I decided to make this a 3-way Survivor Series Match. With 3 different teams of 5. I even stepped it up even further and made it a WarGames match. I know, I know. There is a lot going on, but you did say a dream match and that is what I would want to see. I decided to go with the performers of the three biggest wrestling companies in history. (WWE, WCW, and TNA) Sorry but ECW never had a show on a cable channel as far as I know, so I don’t consider them one of the biggest. The teams would be lined up as such.
WWE 90’s – Stone Cold, The Rock, Triple H, Shawn Michaels, Undertaker
WCW 90’s – Ric Flair, Sting, Lex Luger, Diamond Dallas Page, Goldberg
TNA – Samoa Joe, Abyss, A.J Styles, Jeff Jarrett, Kurt Angle
It would be set-up as war games style with a man entering the ring every 2-5 minutes. However, it would start off with three men and then every 5 minutes, a man from each team would enter the ring at 2 minute intervals, and stay as such until the last guy enters the ring.
The match starts with Shawn Michaels, Sting, and Abyss entering the ring. They all stare each other done is the monumental clash of the Titans of Sports Entertainment. Shawn Michaels goes at Abyss and tries to take the big man off his feet however, Abyss pushes him away. Sting tries to stinger splash Abyss, however, he is pushed away by Abyss again, and HBK and Sting seeing Abyss’ strength decide to team up and beat him down until the buzzer sounds……..and out comes A.J styles runs down to the ring and proceeds to come up with some high-flying moves and starts to help out Abyss from the vicious attack by Sting and HBK. A.J Styles grabs Shawn Michaels and throws him into the cage as Abyss and Sting are going at it. Buzzer sounds…….out comes Lex Luger. He runs directly at Abyss and helps out his buddy Sting. Sting and Luger are conversing in one corner, while Abyss and A.J Styles get to their feet and all 4 are staring at HBK, who plays a cat and mouse game until he is eventually caught by Lex Luger. The countdown has started and HBK is getting a beating and is now has a crimson mask. Buzzer sounds…..TIME TO PLAY THE GAME….Triple H comes down to the ring with Sledgehammer in hand and goes to work on everyone while Shawn Michaels attempts to get to his feet. Triple H and Lex Luger engage in a stare down and start to punch away. While this is going on, Abyss attempts to beat on HBK some more until Sweet Chin Music out of nowhere and falls on top of Abyss for the pinfall. ABYSS ELIMINATED. Buzzer sounds…..out comes Kurt Angle. Kurt starts a stare down with Triple H and HBK who can’t believe he is fighting for TNA after the company that made him was WWE. They start to approach him, until out of nowhere A.J comes off the top rope and clotheslines both men. Seeing this Luger and Sting help out AJ and Kurt and go to work on the DX members. After the clothesline, Triple H has dropped the Sledgehammer which was picked up by Sting and he proceeds to bash AJ over the head and has put him in the Scorpion Deathlock, but Kurt seeing this breaks away from DX and breaks it up…..Buzzer sounds……out comes Goldberg…….Goldberg comes into the ring and cleans house by spearing everyone and is standing all alone on his feet. He sees the Sledgehammer and picks it up with a smile and goes torwards Triple H. He is however, cut off by Shawn Michaels, who is then put in a torture rack by Lex Luger, and Shawn is forced to tap out because of the loss of blood. HBK ELIMINATED. Buzzer sounds……Glass breaks….in enters Stone Cold who goes to town with stunners on everyone….but then stops and looks at Goldberg and who looks pissed about what happened at Wrestlmania 20. He runs at Stone Cold to spear him but Stone Cold moves at last second and Goldberg runs right into a kick and Pedigree and he is eliminated by Triple H….GOLDBERG ELIMINATED. All the teams regroup with each having lost one man so far. Right now it stands as Trips and Stone Cold, Sting and Luger, AJ and Kurt. All teams set plans and all go after Sting and Luger, with Sting being in there the longest, however, Sting seems to have fought off all comers until Kurt Angle comes from behind with the sledgehammer right to the head. Seeing this Luger runs at Kurt with the running forearm and he has knocked Angle out, but he is caught in the ropes saving him from being pinned. Buzzer sounds……Samoa Joe is running to ring and proceeds to sending Trips and Sting with flying kicks. He puts Luger in the Sleeper and Luger has tapped out……LUGER eliminated Sting is now all by himself, and it is not looking good for WCW….until Buzzer sounds….SELF HI FIVE…..DDP makes his way to the ring and Diamond Cuts AJ Styles who was working on Sting. AJ is pinned and is done……AJ ELIMINATED. DDP helps Sting up and they go running at Stone Cold and Kurt Angle. During this Trips is fighting with Samoa Joe and looks outmatched by the Samoan……Buzzer sounds………IF YOU SMELL…..The Rock is back and ready to kick some ass. Hearing the music, Samoa Joe releases the sleeper and starts to stare at the Rock. The two Samoans are in the middle of the rings starting at each other with only the ropes between them. Quite a sight to see. Samoa Joe turns around to walk away but then turns around again to jump over the rope and the Rock expecting this catches him and Rock Bottom, 1-2-3. SAMOA JOE ELIMINATED So only Kurt Angle remains desperatly waiting for Jeff Jarrett to make his way to the ring. DDP is going at it with Stone Cold, while Triple H who has now been bloodied by his own sledgehammer is going at with an exhausted Sting. Buzzer sounds…..WOOOOOO. Ric Flair is on his way to the ring to help save Sting and Triple H has turned around and knows that his mentor is for once not with him. Ric Flair stars right away on Triple H and goes and chops everyone that is around him. OVATION DEAFANING. WOOOOO. Ric Flair goes and helps Sting up and they are ready to clean house. When out of nowhere. Ric Flair low blows Sting, who is then put into the Ankle Lock and is forced to tap-out….STING ELIMINATED Everyone looks on in shock as Flair has turned on Sting. Flair then goes an hugs Triple H and they were in on it all along. When Ric Flair turns around, Stone Cold has two fingers waiting and stuns him…….FLAIR ELIMINATED (WCW GONE). Buzzer sounds. Jeff Jarrett makes his way to the ring with his guitar and smashes it over the heads of Triple H and Stone Cold. Triple H is pinned by Kurt Angle….TRIPLE H ELIMINATED. Stone Cold and The Rock are in the ring waiting for Kurt Angle and Jeff Jarrett to turn around. However, there is still one more entry…..GONG…..The Undertaker is making his way to the ring. Everyone is starting at his entrance. It looks as if WWE is going to wrap this one up, however as everyone is staring at the Undertaker, the Rock has been Angle-Slammed and is eliminated. ROCK ELIMINATED…..Undertaker tried to run down but could not make the save…..in the ring now, The Undertaker and Stone Cold against Kurt and Jarrett. As they are staring each other down…NO CHANCE IN HELL….Vince Mcmahon makes his way down to the ring and demands a victory for his team. All 4 start to go at it, when all of a sudden all of the TNA wrestlers fired my McMahon make there way out and attack Vince. Rhyno, Christian, Booker T all start to beat on Vince McMahon, and during this Kurt Angle slammed Undertaker for the 1-2-3. So Kurt and Jeff against Stone Cold. Until all of sudden…..when it comes crashing down…..HULK HOGAN….it gets in and starts to whoop ass with Stone Cold and after a leg drop and a stunner. TNA IS ELIMINATED. Hogan and Stone Cold are celebrating in the ring until Stone Cold kicks Hogan and stunner. The move everyone has wanted to see down for almost 10 years. The show ends with Stone Cold drinking beer celebrating the win for WWE.
Bill Broderson
|
|
I love the idea, and while this has a ton of flaws, I got a hell of a kick from reading it. As I said, it has problems, like WCW being treated as inferior to TNA, and I thought the order of entry/elimination was questionable, but I think that you overbooked this to the point that it became highly entertaining – particularly the ending with Hulk Hogan (loathe him as I do) making his way to the ring to clean house on TNA, who were seemingly in control. Good work overall.
Next up is Jay;
|
Team Perfect vs. Team Madness
Simple Survivor Series booking: Mr. Perfect and “Macho Man” Randy Savage are feuding (Perfect the heel and Savage the face). It’s announced by Raw GM, Gorilla Monsoon that each man will choose partners for a 10 man tag team elimination match.
Hennig first announces his partners who fit well into a team called “The Perfect Team”: The cocky Ken Kennedy, new superstar, the young, talented, physically tough Samoa Joe and reining tag champs, The Hart Foundation.
Savage then chooses his team: the greatest technical wrestler in the world, Chris Benoit, the toughest wrestler in the world, Fit Finlay and the #1 contenders for the tag titles, A.J. Styles and Christopher Daniels.
I don’t want to make this a super long entry but I would have Perfect’s team win since he and Savage are in a one on one feud. This would allow Savage get the win in their final one on one encounter to take place sometime after the PPV. I would have Kennedy eliminated first by Benoit to help the faces start strong. I’d use this match to put over Joe as a strong newcomer (who’s already been squashing jobbers for several weeks on Raw). To cement his reputation for being tough and a great wrestler, I’d have him eliminate Benoit and Finlay (which may lead to a great rivalry between Joe and either Finlay or Benoit). I’d then have AJ eliminate Neidhart but then Perfect eliminate AJ. Daniels would soon eliminate Bret (the elimination of the tag champs by their top contenders would allow a reason for them to retain the titles when the two teams first meet).
This would leave Joe and Perfect against Savage, Daniels. The Genius will be outside in Perfect’s corner, so his interference, Perfect’s cheating and sheer domination by Joe would help them outlast the others. The sole surviors would be Mr. Perfect and Samoa Joe.
Thanks for listening,
Jay in CT
|
|
Top notch booking here. First of all, I love your teams. Incorporating a Hart Foundation/Styles and Daniels feud is near-genius; two great teams really on opposite ends of the spectrum but who could obviously have fantastic matches together. I like the idea of having Samoa Joe looking strong as a newcomer and pairing him off with Finlay or Benoit is a great idea and one that would surely produce a score of great matches. I think it’s also a good idea to have the heels go over, setting up the one-on-one blow off between Perfect and Savage where Savages goes over. If there was one change I would make, it’d be AJ and Savage being the final two men in the match for their team as opposed to Savage and Daniels.
And finally, Payload-regular Jeremy has a few ideas;
|
Bret Hart, Owen Hart, Chris Benoit, John Cena and Jake “The Snake” Roberts vs. Hulk Hogan, Shawn Michaels, Kurt Angle, Chris Jericho and The Undertaker – The teams may seem odd, but it would be for the combinations of great showdowns. I think that this match would be the culmitation of multiple dream matchups, Bret vs. Hogan, Bret vs. Angle, Owen vs. Jericho (who Jericho sites as a huge influence), Cena vs. Hogan, Roberts vs. Hogan. Benoit had great matches with Shawn, Angle and Jericho. And the history between Shawn Michaels and Bret Hart would make this a must see. Winner is too hard for me too decide.
My Mind on my Money (Ted Dibiase, IRS, Robert Roode, Kid Kash and “Confederate Currency” Chris Hamrick) vs. My Money on my Beer (Steve Austin, Sandman, James Storm, Ron Simmons and Scott Hall) JBL would be the special guest referee as he cannot choose which side he wants to be on. – Winners? My Money on my Beer with Steve Austin as the final survivor
Demolition (Ax, Smash, Crush, Randy Colley and Mr Fuji) vs. Legion of Doom (Hawk, Animal, King Kong Bundy, Jake Roberts and Paul Ellering) – Demolition was a Road Warriors knockoff, I think it would be cool if they put together the three members from Demolition (Ax, Smash and Crush) plus original member Randy Colley (was in group before Smash joined) and manager Mr. Fuji to face Hawk, Animal, Paul Ellering and any two of the other members of the GCW stable. Winners: Legion of Doom, with Hawk and Animal as the final survivors.
Olympians (Kurt Angle, Ken Patera, Mark Henry, Iron Sheik and Brad Rheingans) vs. The NFL (Brock Lesnar, Goldberg, JBL, Monty Brown and Brian Pillman) – Just an interesting question, the NFL or the Olympics. Winners: Olympians with Kurt Angle final survivor
And finally probably the most original idea to be submitted – Little Beaver, Little Boogeyman, Dink, Pink and Wink (Doink’s partners from Survivor Series 1994) vs., Hornswaggle, Short Sleeve Sampson Queasy, Cheesy and Sleazy (Lawler’s partners from Survivor Series 1994) – Team Horni would win
Jeremy from Palmdale
|
|
A mixed bag here, I think. I have a strong dislike for anything involving little man wrestlers, so putting ten of them in the same match is not to my liking, but there’s obviously a select audience who would love to see something like that.
Olympians vs. NFL is a damn fine concept in theory, but looking at some of the guys involved, I’m not confident that it would produce a very good match. On the contrary, Henry, Sheik Rheingans, Goldberg and JBL all in the same match could spell disaster. On the other hand, when it gets down to the final few men, we could be left with Angle vs. Lesnar, or Angle vs. Goldberg or Angle vs. Pillman, which would all be very enjoyable to see, I think.
On the upside, Demolition vs. LOD would be all kinds of awesome. I also love the concept of Beer vs. Money; having JBL as the guest referee is a VERY nice touch. Your crowning jewel however, is surely your first idea; so many great superstars in one match. The only questionable guy in there, I think, is Jake Roberts. I was never much of a fan of the guy.
And now for the part where I provide my own idea;
|
The Hart Foundation (Bret Hart, Jim Neidhart, Owen Hart, Brian Pillman and The British Bulldog) vs. The Kliq (Shawn Michaels, Triple H, Kevin Nash, Scott Hall and Sean Waltman)
Whole bunch of controversial figures here, huh? The beginning of the match sees a mass brawl. The pace slows down and The Kliq isolate Owen. Waltman gets cocky though and misses a bronco buster allowing the hot tag to the Bulldog. He cleans house and hits Waltman with a powerslam, but HBK sneaks in and hits Bulldog with Chin Music, allowing Waltman to pin him.
Pillman gets isolated now, and through heel trickery, The Kliq prevent a tag for a good while. Their heel antics backfire though as Hall spends too much time taunting Pillman’s partners and gets caught with Air Pillman, evening up the sides. Triple H is able to capitalize on a hurt Pillman though and hits him with a quick Pedigree to eliminate.
With The Kliq up 4-3, Nash and Owen square off. Owen works over the legs but Nash takes over when Triple H drills Owen from the apron. Owen comes back though and gets a hot tag to Bret who cleans house. All seven men rush the ring and a mass brawl ensues. Nash attempts the Jack-knife of Bret, but Shawn’s SCM aimed at Neidhart misses and strikes Nash. Neidhart takes HBK to the floor and Bret gets a jack-knife roll-up on Nash to eliminate him.
Waltman quickly tries to take advantage of Bret but gets caught with a small package and gets eliminated, leaving The Kliq with just 2 guys left. The Hart Foundation dominate from here and use some of the heel tactics The Kliq did earlier. Michaels gets isolated with Bret in particular putting a beating on him. Trips gets the hot tag though and cleans house. The Hart Foundation rush in to break a pin cover following a spinebuster and it’s on. Triple H gets caught with the Hart Attack but HBK keeps the referee busy. The distraction allows Triple to go low on Neidhart and roll him up for the 3 count. Owen attempts a Piledriver on The Game, but gets caught with Sweet Chin Music, and Trips covers for 3.
Bret is left alone with DX now, but he goes to town on them, putting them both in the Sharpshooter at various points. Vince McMahon makes his way to the ring and gets in Bret’s face, prompting him to throw the Sharpshooter on Vince. The crowd goes nuts but as Bret has the hold on, Shawn connects with Sweet Chin Music and covers Bret. The original DX members survive. Vince tries to celebrate with them after the match but gets a Sweet Chin Music/Pedigree combo for his trouble.
Dan Wilcox
|
|
Entry: Entries will NOT be accepted via the comments section. Entries will NOT be accepted after the deadline. When sending an entry, NO attachments please. All entries should be sent to [email protected]
Deadline: The column has to be in the 411 system by Wednesdays at midnight. I want entries in no later than midnight on Tuesdays.
Acceptance: In the past, there have been too many entries to fit in one column. However, as long as there is room, your entry will be included.
Length: There’s no limit, but be considerate please.
Spelling and grammar: Please check your entries for spelling and grammar mistakes. A few mistakes I don’t mind, but if your entry looks like it’s been written by a three-year old, I’ll probably just shit all over your ideas.
This Week’s Homework: The 2009 Royal Rumble: Book it!
Remember, all entries to [email protected].
