Evolution Schematic 11.08.08: SHIMMER (Part 5)

I’m beginning to see why Small has his whole whammy gimmick thing. Stops him having to think about what to put here. That said, I’ve been playing SDvR09 for a few days, and it’s ok. Running still seems counter intuitive, and no women in hardcore matches I hate, but otherwise it’s solid. Taking Goddess through career mode, she’s about to become YOUR IC champion. Good times.

The other half of my video game time is spent on Fallout 3. Just took care of some fire ants, and now I’m off to go poke rats with a stick, and maybe find that dog, unless I’m too early/too late for that. And while I still love the sledgehammer, the combat shotgun is fighting it out for my true love.

Oh, and next week the ES might go on a slight hiatus as I try something else in order to avoid work burn-out. Although I’m not sure what. Which would you guys rather read, my booking or my opinion?

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3 and, lastly but certainly not leastly, and yes I did just invent a word, deal with it, Part 4. Previously, we have covered SHIMMER from birth through to the initial war Sara Del Rey had to win and then retain her World Title. But while she got past the Minnesota Home Wrecking Crew, a much larger obstacle stepped up.

Phase 15- Nobody puts Kong in a corner!

SHIMMER #15 was, and still is, all about one match, the main event. But other matches took place that night as well. Eden Black continued to establish herself this side of the pond with a tap out victory over Amber O’Neal, who also continued her run of losses. Frickin’ Awesome as a unit debuted in SHIMMER, Portia Perez and Nicole Matthews in her debut defeating Lorelei Lee and Ashley Lane in Lane’s debut.

Another debut followed, as Jetta matched her fellow Brit Edna’s performance with a tap out victory over Serena Deeb. Allison Danger and Cindy Rodgers had an impromptu confrontation and then match, Allison finally getting a solid win over the Technical Bitch and finally being able to move on, even if Danger still had a bad win/loss ratio with her. Alexa Thatcher returned from injury, looking for revenge on Alicia, but first had to prove herself back to 100% with a match against Cheerleader Melissa.

That match took place after The Minnesota Home-Wrecking Crew made short work of Ariel and Josie. Sadly for Alexa, her return to the SHIMMER ring was not a fairy tale one as Melissa calmly defeated her, working towards the inevitable Title match.

The night then began to reach it’s crescendo, as The Experience had to fight damm hard but finally got past The Scream Queens, as MsChif and Daffney called their team. Then came a #1 Contender’s match, and this not being TNA, the winner would fight the winner of the Title match the following show for the belt. Daizee Haze and “Dark Angel” Sarah Stock, the two semi-finalists in the title tourney, met for the first time with such high stakes. In the end, after a superb match, Stock managed to defeat Haze and win the right to fight the champ. But who would that be?

On one side, the SHIMMER Champion, “American Angel” Sara Del Rey. A woman who had a near perfect win/loss record, a woman with a wide variety of ways to beat you, and the woman who outlasted 15 others to win the title.

On the other, Amazing Kong, a giant of a woman who was not in the tournament, but was undefeated and seemingly unstoppable up until that point.

The unmovable meeting the unstoppable, the Dragon verses the Dragon Slayer. The two gave it everything they could, neither woman giving an inch. The ending was both satisfying and yet disappointing, as Del Rey managed to lift Kong up and nail the Royal Butterfly. But as she went to cover, Kong nailed her with a patented back fist. The ref, as is his duty, began a 10 count. Sara was up just before the 10.

Kong wasn’t.

So Sara retained over a very pissed off Kong. Just in time to fight Sarah Stock.

Phase 16- Battle for the Title! And the H!

Very much like it’s sister show, 16 was defined by one match, the main event. And, just like its sister, the undercard, while overlooked, was interesting.

Amber O’Neal attempted to get back in the right side of the victory circle by fighting Lorelei Lee, a woman who had left SHIMMER for a while due to her own losing streak. And yet again, O’Neal cost herself the match, and Lee had a rare win. Frickin’ Awesome’s winning streak came to an end at one when they lost to Ariel and Josie, while the MHWC welcomed an Honorary Home-Wrecker in, Jetta.

Alexa Thatcher managed to prove she wasn’t totally gone with a win over Ashley Lane, Alexa still wanting her revenge. The Experience also proved that they were still around and were shoe ins for any Tag Titles that may or may not be brought in with a win over Allison Danger and Serena Deeb. And Daffney showed us all that her knee injury was both real and intermittent, as after her tag match where it was fine it flared up again in her match with Cindy Rodgers, who naturally went after it and made her tap out.

Then came a first for SHIMMER, a Trios 6 Woman tag match, pitching The International Home-Wrecking Crew against the makeshift team of MsChif, Daizee Haze and Eden Black, which sounds like a set up to a joke. Despite a very, very, VERY long stall process, the makeshifters managed to get a win.

Right before the main event saw a defacto #1 Contender’s match, as the girl on her way up, Cheerleader Melissa, fought the woman on her way down, Amazing Kong. Both wanted a title shot, both had a good claim. But in the end, Kong managed to end Melissa’s winning streak and lay claim to getting the rematch she deserved.

Then, finally, came the title match, with the two Angels fighting for the belt, with 2 out of 3 falls stips added.

And at first, it seemed that this backfired on Del Rey slightly, as she managed to get the first fall, and thus would have been done there had it been a normal match. But Stock came back, and became only the second woman in SHIMMER history to pin Del Rey, tying it up 1 fall each. The two women then threw caution to the wind as they put everything they had at one another, trying to score that decisive blow. But in the end, it was a simple roll up, albeit a very fast one, that gave Del Rey her second fall, her title retention, and a standing ovation for both women’s athleticism and sportswomanship, as they shook hands afterwards.

However, the next woman Del Rey was taking to the limit with, was not one she really wanted to shake hands with.

Phase 17- Debuts, returns and… Del Rey gets dominated???

SHIMMER 17 was a show that heralded change in the company. New alliances were being formed, new faces, new attitudes, a new division, and a main event that foreshadowed the next phase in the company’s journey.

Rain and Jetta officially became The International Home-Wrecking Crew as a team, with Lacey heading back into the single’s division that she very nearly ruled. The SHIMMER Tag Ranks were bolstered twice as much in the first match, as the new official duo went up against another debuting team, Canada’s Danyah and “Girl Dynamite” Jennifer Blake. And while Jetta and Rain won the match by submission, the Canucks put in a good showing and confirmed their place as a team to be reckoned with.

Shark Girl, the mysterious Oriental masked woman, debuted against Nicole Matthews, Nicole trying very hard and failing to land and gut the pretty pink shark. Likewise Ashley Lane and Neveah tried, and failed, to upset The Experience, the veteran women not taking any shit from a couple of blonde bimbos.

Their attitude, not mine.

Amber O’Neal then, finally, focused on the match and not herself, and lo and behold, she managed to get a win over Lorelie Lee. It seemed that she had finally got the message and was about to focus on, you know, winning matches and stuff.

Cindy Rogers, who had no problems with being serious, tried to add Daizee Haze’s name to her list of victims, targeting the young girl’s knee relentlessly, Daizee forced to utilize a roll up to get the win, annoying Rodgers enough to steal Daizee’s flowers, thus annoying Daizee enough to steal Rogers’ leather jacket. But the important thing was that Haze won, and I’m sure she had some sort of pain relief to help soothe her knee…

Amazing Kong then showed us al what happened when Amazing Kong was mad. What happens is that whatever poor girl is fighting her, in this case Ariel, if that woman doesn’t go down quickly, Kong unleashes her anger on whomever is near, in this case a referee, and thus she gets DQed. So maybe pissing her off is a good thing, if you want a cheap win over her. Although Ariel’s constant kicking out and standing up to Kong did gain her respect from the fans, so it wasn’t that cheap a win.

Mercedes Martinez then made her return to SHIMMER, going up against a debuting Croatian Panther, Wesna Busic. Wesna, a popular woman in the European scene, knew all about Mercedes’ shoulder injury that had kept her out for over a year. And while she was liked and respected her opponent, she was also here to win. So, when Martinez seemed to re-aggravate it, Busic went immediately to work, trying to dismantle her shoulder into Lego piece sized chucks and then perhaps build a hat, or small clock radio from the parts. However, eventually Mercedes counted a CB4-Driver into a Fisherwoman Buster for a very emotional, hard fought win. The two women embraced (Yay!) then Mercedes vowed that if it were not for injury, she would be the Champion now, being the only woman to have beaten Del Rey in SHIMMER. And whomever was holding it, she was going to come for and win the title.

The only other woman who could come close to holding a win over Del Rey, a single fall in a 2/3 falls match, was up next to refute this claim. Sarah Stock showed that she, unlike Kong, would not let defeat anger her; she would continue to work hard to earn another shot. And defeating Lacey, even when Lacey had both Rain and Jetta ringside with her, was a very good way to go about this. Being really hot as well was just a bonus.

But for all these claims, and impressive victories, it was the main event that truly sent a message about the title. The Dangerous Angels, Danger and Del Rey, took on Melissa and MsChif. And the result was pretty shocking, Melissa pinning Danger with the Kudo Driver. But it was more the match itself than the result, as these were the 4 biggest names, arguably, in the company. All were seen as on the same level, perhaps Del Rey slightly higher due to her W/L and, of course, her title.

But what was shocking was MsChif’s interaction with Del Rey. Twice near the end of the match, she had it won with a cover on Sara, only for Allison to break it up the first time and the ref being distracted the second time. Del Rey managed to just tag out, leading to Melissa pinning Danger. But those moments were noted, as twice, MsChif looked to have the champion pinned, clean as a whistle.

And if anything can get you a title shot…

Phase 18- New Champion! New Champion! New Champion!

My apologies if I’ve ruined the suspense there.

But indeed, SHIMMER 18, for all its positive points, really, more than the other shows I’ve already said this about, the main event is the big one. The main event is where most people focus on.

Shark Girl’s win over Amber O’Neal hardly gets a mention outside of those sad conspiracy nutters who claim that Shark Girl isn’t really Japanese and is someone who we all know.

MsChif’s confrontation with Del Rey is talked about, since it’s there that the title match is signed, with both women admitting or bragging that MsChif had Del Rey pinned, and thus a title match was made.

Nicole Matthews over Lorelei Lee? Average fan probably didn’t even notice.

Daizee Haze’s solid, if hard-fought win over Jetta? Well, Jetta’s fans in the UK and those fans who love the weed…y looking Daizee were annoyed or overjoyed respectively, but still, most people were thinking about the main event.

Allison Danger announcing her injury at the hands of Cheerleader Melissa, taking her out of action, but not commentary? That did get some attention, but not much.

The Experience firmly, yet again, proving their dominance in preparation for the now officially upcoming Tag Title introduction, with a brutal win over Jennifer Blake & Danyah? Only historians, fans and promotional package makers would remember that one.

Ariel going over a debuting Cat Power? Many might remember this if only because they went “Cat Power? What sort of name is Cat Power?”

Mercedes Martinez giving Cindy Rogers a rare consecutive loss? Ok, this one I’ll give you some people remember fondly, the match being rather good.

Similarly, Ashley Lane & Neveah getting a win over The Minnesota Home-Wrecking Crew is also remembered by many, since it was just so unexpected an upset. Not that the fans were complaining, it was just really, really unexpected.

Amazing Kong defeating her Japan cohort Wesna Busic was not, however. Although the closeness of the contest perhaps was to some degree.

Cheerleader Melissa’s win over Sarah Stock was remembered by many, since it was a superb match and it finished with Melissa again busting out the Kudo Driver (after Sarah managed to counter an earlier attempt) to win, giving Melissa a win back over Stock, and a perfect 3 for 3 record with the move, which made up for it being incredibly dangerous and injuring people.

But then came the main event. And even while DP and Danger were talking about how MsChif’s claims were cloudy since she had a lot of help from Melissa to have uncounted falls over Del Rey, no doubt could be left after a shocking, out of nowhere Desecrator on Del Rey getting the 123 and the title, MsChif now becoming YOUR SHIMMER Champion.

Phase 19- Ch-ch-changes!

Volume 19 of SHIMMER was, unlike some of the other shows, not dwarfed by its main event. Opening the show with a 21 woman Royal Rumble, sorry, Battle Royal with 30 second intervals, will help do that. The winner would receive the title shot at the end of the night. In order, Portia Perez, Serena Deeb, Jennifer Blake, Nicole Matthews, Shark Girl, Cat Power, Jetta, LuFisto, Veronika Vice, Ariel, Rain, Lorelei Lee, Cheerleader Melissa, Nevaeh, Sara Del Rey, Allison Danger, Danyah, Ashley Lane, Amazing Kong, Mercedes Martinez and Nikki Roxx all battled it out. Eventually, after the whole ring helped to toss Kong, and some more women got tossed, it came down to Jetta, Del Rey, Roxx, Martinez and Ariel. Del Rey went on a tear, tossing Roxx and then Martinez. But as she finished tossing Martinez, Ariel came from behind and tossed Del Rey.

Sara didn’t like this, and from the floor helped to pull Ariel out and give the win to Jetta, Sara screaming about Ariel costing her the chance to regain ‘my belt’ as she beat on her before referees were able to send her back to her dressing room.

While everyone recovered, Daizee Haze told us all how she was injured and had to sit this taping out. But she swore she’d be back for 21, and was demanding a title shot.

Portia took part in the first 1 on 1 match of the evening, defeating Shark Girl with a rope assisted pin, although she was more proud of how she counted a couple of bodyslam attempts during the match. Unlike Serena Deeb, who was happy enough with her win over Danyah.

Ashley Lane & Neveah defeated Cat Power and Veronika Vice, cementing their status as surprise contenders for the tag belts, and giving poor Miss Vice a less than stellar night overall. Although it ended better than Lorelei Lee’s, as she ended up with a loss and a dislocated jaw thanks to Amazing Kong.

Nikki Roxx’s return to SHIMMER was not totally ruined by the Battle Royal, as she got a win over Nicole Matthews, which explains Nicole’s mood afterwards. Because after the Roxx/Matthews match, Allison Danger fought and defeated Jennifer Blake. She then praised Blake and Canadians in general, saying how great it was for us to see such rising Canadian stars entering SHIMMER. This brought out Matthews and her partner, Perez, who declared that, since they were Freakin’ Awesome, they were the best Canadians in the company. After disparaging Danger’s Canadianess, a tag match was signed between the four for Volume 20.

LuFisto’s debut night with the company also looked up, as she defeated Rain with a burning hammer, which sadly does not lend itself to a funny female name. Also lacking in humor was Del Rey’s systematic and slightly disturbing match with Ariel, as Del Rey unleashed her frustration and damm near killed the poor girl to win the match.

Part of this anger might have been permeative, as Martinez and Melissa met once again in a 20 minute epic that saw Mercedes pick up the win and head into the following show with a title match, which surely must have annoyed Del Rey even more.

But at least she had a shot at beating the woman who ‘stole’ her title, as MsChif proved herself not a fluke with a strong retention over Jetta. Although given Jetta had wrestled once already, perhaps that victory wasn’t as impressive as it sounded.

Phase 20- Bodyslams, Tights and Kudo Drivers.

Shark Girl getting a solid win over Veronika Vice started the night, although the status quo was about to change.

Following that match, Portia Perez claimed that she was the ‘Master (sic) Of Avoiding The Bodyslam’. Allison Danger scoffed, and claimed she could do it within a minute of their tag match. Portia then declared that she was so confident, she would put up $1000 (Canadian) on the line, should Danger do it within a minute. The match began with ticking clock, and lo and behold, Portia was able to avoid the bodyslam for the whole minute. The match proper began, and the now redubbed Canadian Ninjas, Perez and Matthews, showed no mercy to Danger and Blake, even when Danger re-aggravated her collarbone injury. Portia made Danger tap to an armbar, then after the bell nailed a stiff Divorce Court on her to further send a message, bragging that she had put Danger back on the disabled list all the way back to the locker room.

Then came two matches that by now were SHIMMER fixtures, a win by Amazing Kong, this time over Danyah, and a submission loss from Daffney thanks to her bad knee, this time Cat Power getting the win.

The International Home-Wrecking Crew, Rain and Jetta, gained relative last minute momentum leading into next show’s Tag Title Gauntlet match, with a win over Ashley Lane and Nevaeh when Rain pinned Nevaeh with a big handful of tights, something I’m sure a lot of men in the audience would have liked to do also.

Ariel continued her improbable rise to the top with a win over Nikki Roxx, who raised Ariel’s hand in a show of respect after the match. Respect was something missing from the following match, as Sara Del Rey was still in a pissy mood and made Serena Deeb tap out.

Then came a superb match, as Cheerleader Melissa again unleashed what was quickly becoming the most devastating move in SHIMMER, the Kudo Driver, on LuFisto to win the match and gain a standing ovation from the fans. The fans were equally as enthralled by Mercedes Martinez’s shot at the title, Mercedes and MsChif having a brutal, even match up that saw MsChif manage to nail the Desecrator and get the win, barely. While it seemed that Melissa, with her devastating move, and MsChif, the unlikely definition of a fighting champion, would be a logical match up. But someone else stepped up to the plate first.

Phase 21- Wait, us Aussies INVENTED Tag Team Wrestling, this can’t be right!

Although the show was centered on the Tag Team Title Gauntlet match, there was much that occurred at Volume 21. Serena Deeb came out and asked, very nicely, for another match with Del Rey, she wanted to prove herself after almost but not quite winning the last time they fought. Del Rey came out and told Deeb to go beep herself, as she was sick of fighting the bottom of the barrel, she had a title to win back. The two women yelled at each other for a while, and eventually a wrestling match broke out, Del Rey seemingly proving her point with a win, although Deeb put up a strong fight and thus proved her point as well.

Miss Natural then debuted with a win over Lorelei Lee, which while sounding good didn’t really mean much, since Lee wasn’t exactly a strong name to win against.

But compared to someone like Daffney, who finally got a win following that match, it was better. Daffney got a rematch against Cat Power, saying how her knee was fixed and then insulting Cat Power with cat like phrases and such, insinuating that she was, in fact, a pussy.

Cat.

Cat Power eventually showed, they had a match, and Daffney won thanks in part to such distractions as a ball of yearn that Cat for some reason felt compelled to chase.

Nikki Roxx won over Danyah and Wesna Busic returned with a victory over a more serious Amber O’Neal, and then it came time for the SHIMMER Tag Team Championship Gauntlet. Six teams drew numbers at random to determine the order of entry, although it was clearly rigged since the International Wild Team, Australia’s own Pink Ladies, Madison Eagles and Jessie McKay got stuck with 2, while the Canadian Ninjas, Perez and Matthews, were #1. The Canadians CLEARLY cheated, and somehow got a win over the Aussies to advance.

The Suicide Blondes, LuFisto and Jennifer Blake were up next, and they managed to get past the cheating bastard Canadians.

The International Home Wrecking Crew, Rain and Jetta, then continued the pattern with a win over the Blondes, Jetta using a foreign object to knock Blake out.

Ashley Lane and Nevaeh then seemed to seal their own fate by coming in and winning, the fresh team winning again, making it seem likely that the lucky last team would win. And once The Experience sauntered out, it seemed inevitable.

Of course, how I wrote that makes it clear that Lane and Nevaeh won, and that they did, becoming the first SHIMMER Tag Team Champions.

A #1 Contenders 4 Corner match followed, with Ariel, Melissa, Kong and Mercedes battling it out for the title shot in Volume 22. And after a great match, Ariel’s rise continued as after Martinez hit her Fisherperson’s Buster on Melissa, she got distracted by Kong, allowing Ariel to hit the Dariel on Melissa and get the pin, and the title shot.

Ariel/MsChif was then confirmed as MsChif defended the title yet again in the main event, retaining the belt with a win over Daizee Haze, who was coming back from injury and had a winning streak prior, including a win over MsChif. MsChif, out of respect, granted her a shot, then out of pride, won the match.

But the end of the show saw Serena Deeb talking to camera, as she admitted that she failed to win but would not rest. She wanted a title shot, regardless of who she had to fight, she would earn her shot. MsChif interrupted her, and admitted to admiring Deeb’s progress and fights against Del Rey, the woman she bet for the belt. She told Deeb that if and or when she beat Del Rey, she would have her shot. The two shook hands on the deal.

It would soon be put to the test.

Phase 22- Larry Sweeney. Better Than You.

SHIMMER 22 was chaotic for a few reasons. People came in, people left, and things really began to pick up. The evening began with Rain getting a pinfall win over Daffney with the Acid rain, and a clearly still rattled Cat Power losing to Danyah. Amazing Kong also got her seemingly legally required victory, nearly crushing poor Rachel Summerlyn on route.

But then stuff went down. Valerie Malone, SHIMMER’s new color commentator, interviewed Allison Danger in ring. Danger told the fans that not only had Portia caused her injury to re-aggravate, she was also working on the ‘next generation of SHIMMER stars’, i.e. she was pregnant.

(Question for future reference: I wanted to say ‘up the duff’ there as a joke, but took it out since I wasn’t sure that term was widely known. Is it? I understand I’ve just turned a moderately all right joke into a bizarre, meta-comedic attention grabber, but hell, guy only lives once.)

Portia then came out as Danger talked about next year when she would be back in the ring and looking for payback. Portia began to berate Danger for gaining weight, then declaring she would end Danger’s career, among other things, there and then. Portia hit the ropes, but before she could do anything horrible, referee Bryce Remsburg tackled her down thus earning him major kudos in my book, his fellow refs coming out to help keep the two apart as the worrying, uncomfortable scene ended.

The Experience attempted to rebuild themselves with a win over the Pink Ladies who were clearly not ready for a match after how they were so totally screwed earlier on. Thankfully the fans noted the awesomeness and asked The Ladies to return.

Mercedes continued to prove her dominance, although her victory over Amber O’Neal was not as one sided as it would have been a short while ago, O’Neal still on the losing track but getting closer and closer to finding that inner drive she was lacking.

Likewise, Cheerleader Melissa’s win over Jennifer Blake was not as one sided as you might expect, the match going all over the place before Melissa got the win with an Air Raid Crash.

And Daizee Haze continued the run of “Hard fought matches won over stepped up wrestlers” with a win over Miss Natural who seemed, well, to be a natural for SHIMMER.

Then Sara Del Rey came out, and she, was, PISSED. She had seen the agreement between MsChif and Deeb, and she was not happy. But since she was a main event star, she had a main event manager.

Cue Mr. Larry Sweeney, Hero to Trillions.

Larry came to make his announcement then leave, since he had no interest in being in Berwyn any longer than he was required to by being Del Rey’s ROH agent. He announced to the crowd that he was getting Del Rey her rematch for the title, but in ROH, not here in a SHIMMER ring. And, FYI, since Del Rey held 2 wins to none over Serena, Del Rey had no reason to wrestle, and he invited her back to the limo for sushi and to take the night off.

Thus proving, once gain, that Sweeney > You.

But the night went on, with Jetta beating Nikki Roxx with a quick thinking eye rake and roll up, and the newly crowned SHIMMER Tag Champs successfully defending their belts against Perez and Matthews.

An International Dream Match followed, as LuFisto, the Canadian, fought Wesna Busic, the Croatian. Maple Leaf beat… That Coat Of Arms thing, as LuFisto beat Busic.

MsChif then took place in the main event, giving Ariel her title shot that she earned, and MsChif’s 5th defence since winning it. The match was great, with MsChif getting the win with a Desecrator to firmly establish herself as an honest, worthy champion. This is why Del Rey ran out and attacked MsChif, and while Deeb then ran out to brawl with Del Rey. Senior Ref Bryce Remsburg watched as the two fought, alone, in the ring, and then called for the bell, making an impromptu Deeb/Del Rey match.

Del Rey, once she got over her shock, worked as hard as she ever had to try and take down Deeb, but Serena, with the fans behind her, refused to die. After shot after shot, Deeb kept getting up and screaming for more. Sara eventually panicked and went to the well once too often, and after a brutal spear, Deeb got the 123 and her title shot. Del Rey tried a blindside attack, but MsChif made the save, and before the two could teach Del Rey a lesson, Sweeney saved his client and re-enforced the idea that his ring, ROH, his arena, it’d be different.

Today- Break!

SHIMMER will not be holding any more events this year, although both belts will be defended at ROH shows. The many feuds in SHIMMER right now, Danger V Portia, MsChif & Deeb V Del Rey, Everyone V Aussies, they show no sign of slowing down or cooling over the break.

Conclusion

SHIMMER is seen by many as a niche product. It’s for those sad losers who don’t want to see skimpily clothed women, but women athletes. But really, SHIMMER is one of the best wrestling, note the word, companies out there today. If you can get over the fact that it’s women, some of the best matches and most interesting stories are held and told in that ring. You may not like it, but you have to respect it.

Besides, anything that helps bring the average quality of a TNA or WWE show up is a good thing, right? And SHIMMER does just that. Men have ROH and the other Indies to hone their trade. Women have SHIMMER.