411’s TNA Impact Wrestling Report 2.28.2013

PREVIOUSLY ON IMPACT WRESTLING: The Lethal Lockdown match is announced, Bully Ray is selected as the #1 contender to the TNA World Championship, Hulk Hogan is attacked by The Aces and 8’s to end last week’s show.

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A video from “Earlier Today” plays where the mysterious interviewer tries to get a comment from Bully Ray and Brooke Hogan about her father’s condition. Ray and Brooke say he’s messed up really bad then quickly rush off.

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The pyrotechnics are in full force in the Impact Zone as Todd Keneley welcomes the home audience. The music of Bully Ray hits and out he comes. He stops by the commentating table to find Taz but Mike Tenay says he’s conveniently not here. Ray starts off saying how cool it is to be back in the Impact Zone, but then says he’s never been more pissed off in his life. Ray says The Aces and 8’s have been running roughshod over TNA for the past year, naming those the biker group have taken out plus their destruction of his wedding to Brooke. Ray says last week should have been a huge week for TNA with the in-ring return of Hulk Hogan but they ruined that too. Ray swears to God that he will get his hands on The Aces and 8’s, his former partner Devon especially. Ray says there’s one other guy he wants to speak to and introduces his opponent in two weeks at Lockdown: the returning TNA World Champion Jeff Hardy.

Hardy makes his way out, both TNA World Titles over his shoulders. Hardy sets down his custom title then makes his way around the ringside area to slap hands with the fans. Hardy gets on the apron and poses for the crowd before heading in to meet face to face with Bully Ray. They bump fists as the music dies down and the crowd chants Hardy’s name. Ray says never in his wildest dreams did he think they would be standing across from one another wrestling for the most prestigious title in wrestling. Ray tells Hardy he doesn’t feel right about getting a shot at the title due to being Hulk’s son-in-law. Ray says he’s not sure this is the way he wants to face Hardy and isn’t positive if he’s the right guy to challenge Hardy at Lockdown.

Hardy grabs the mic and says it’s great to be back on IMPACT and “in the Zone!” which prompts the crowd to chant his name once again. Hardy says he would’ve chose Ray himself and brings up their history climbing ladders, swinging chairs, and breaking tables. Hardy says they have reinvented themselves and at Lockdown they will reinvent their history. The respect-fest is interrupted by Christopher Daniels and Frankie Kazarian who make their way to the ring. Kazarian says Ray should feel bad he got the title shot because he didn’t earn it, he was given it. Daniels takes the mic and says the only person who deserves to main event Lockdown less is Hardy himself and blames Hardy’s facepaint for losing (he had an allergic reaction). Daniels tells them if they’re done gladhanding each other it’s time to get out of the ring so they can let the Impact crowd worship them.

Ray grabs Daniels’ Appletini, drinks it, then spits it back in the glass. Ray says real men don’t drink Appletinis, then Hardy and Ray clear the ring of Bad Influence. Ray challenges them to a tag team match later tonight. Hardy’s music hits as Daniels and Kazarian react to the challenge as well as the disrespect.

• SEGMENT THOUGHTS: Really good opening segment to set up the main event for this week’s show as well as the upcoming Lockdown main event. Never doubt Bad Influence’s ability to make anything in TNA better.

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Cut to the announce table where Keneley and Tenay hype up tonight’s show and the fact that Taz is still nowhere to be found.

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New Knockouts Champion Velvet Sky is walking backstage. Her match is next.

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-Commercial Break-

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Sting is backstage in Hulk Hogan’s office. Magnus is with him and makes the case for being included on the “Lethal Lockdown” match. Magnus says he’s not the green new kid anymore and says Sting has mentored him since he arrived in TNA. Magnus says it’s time he pays Sting back; he’s not just Team TNA, he’s Team Sting. Magnus concludes with “why me? Why the hell not!” then leaves the office, letting Sting contemplate his words.

• THOUGHTS: Glad they aren’t forgetting about Magnus now that they’re back in the States. Underrated talent who deserves the chance to shine.

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Gail Kim has joined Todd Keneley and Mike Tenay at the announce table and they announce she is getting a Knockouts Title shot at Lockdown against the winner of this match. Tara makes her way out for the match, finally once again accompanied by her boyfriend Jessie Godderz. We see clips of the four way elimination match from last week that resulted in a new champion. Knockouts Champion Velvet Sky makes her way out second. We see clips of Sky pinning Kim to win the belt in the aforementioned match from last week. Kim blames the loss on the incompetency of TNA Knockouts ref Taryn Terrell.

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Match #1: Velvet Sky (c) Vs. Tara [w/ Jessie Godderz] for the TNA Knockouts Title

Tara takes advantage early with shoulderblocks in the corner before tossing Sky to the mat via the hair. Tara goes for an early cover but only gets 2. Tara tries again for another 2-count. Tara whips Sky into the corner but Sky gets her boots up during a corner splash attempt then side steps another one. Sky responds with a series of running clotheslines and elbows. Tara reverses an Irish whip but Sky responds with a tilt-a-whirl headscissors takedown. Godderz grabs Sky’s ankle to distract her and Terrell yells at Godderz. Sky spears Tara to the mat and goes for the cover but Godderz pulls Sky off. Terrell yells at Godderz to leave the ringside area and Tara argues with her about it. This distraction allows Sky to hit the In Yo’ Face for the 1…2…3.

Winner and STILL Knockouts Champion [via Pinfall]: Velvet Sky (2:07)

• MATCH THOUGHTS: Eh it was what it was. The focus wasn’t even on Tara so much as Gail Kim’s issues with Terrell. Her match against Sky at Lockdown pretty much writes itself at this point.

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Austin Aries is backstage lambasting partner Bobby Roode on the phone for not being here for a photo shoot. Roode inaudibly brings up the Lockdown triple threat against Chavo/Hernandez and Bad Influence. Chavo Guerrero Jr. interrupts the phone call and says Aries has a match tonight…against Hernandez. They exit, leaving Aries to contemplate the announcement.

• THOUGHTS: TNA announcing another match for their PPV via scripted phone call was awesome in its ridiculousness. Also so so random.

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-Commercial Break-

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EARLIER IN THE DAY: The mysterious interview catches up with Kenny King and asks King where he’s going in his TNA career. King says “right to Rob Van Dam”. King ambushes Rob Van Dam in the dress room and tells him to tell the world that King is better than him. RVD says he’s already beat him many times and offers a challenge: King gets one more title shot and if he loses he’s out of the X-Division.

• THOUGHTS: Please let King win, please let King win, please let…

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Austin Aries makes his way out for the second match, his partner Bobby Roode nowhere to be found. Taz is now at the announce table. His opponent Hernandez makes his way out second, also without his tag team partner. He’s in tights instead of his normal attire.

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Match #2: Hernandez Vs. Austin Aries

Hernandez rushes right at Aries, who hides between the ropes to avoid punishment. Aries uses his speed to duck under Hernandez and connects with a forearm to the back but Hernandez takes him down with a kick. Aries attempts a hip toss but Hernandez blocks it and gives Aries one of his own. Hernandez clotheslines Aries over the top rope and onto the floor. Hernandez revs up to take to the air but Aries catches him with a shoulderblock on the apron. Aries attempts a sunset flip but Hernandez powers out then clotheslines him to the mat. Aries gets his elbow up during a splash attempt but is caught mid-crossbody. Aries rakes Hernandez’s eyes while caught in the power bomb position then throws him through the ropes and onto the floor. Aries follows up with the suicide dive, then rolls back in to gloat before heading back to the top. Aries connects with a double axehandle to the back of Hernandez, then rolls him back in to continue the assault. Aries takes Hernandez down with a snapmare then goes back to the top. Hernandez rolls out of the way and Aries hits nothing but canvas. Hernandez takes flight and drops Aries with a shoulderblock before dropping him with a Gorilla press slam. Hernandez sets up for the Border Toss but Aries slides out and hits a rolling elbow. Aries runs at Hernandez but Hernandez easily shakes him off and Aries goes flying. Aries starts bailing with his Tag Team belt but Hernandez grabs him and throws him back in the ring. Aries threatens to hit Hernandez with the belt, but hands it to him instead. Hernandez goes to hit him with it but the ref blocks it and while he’s distracted Aries pulls out a chain and drops Hernandez with it for the 1…2…3.

Winner [via Pinfall]: Austin Aries (4:30)

• MATCH THOUGHTS: A better match than I expected as I’m not much of a Hernandez fan. But he wasn’t all that sloppy and Aries guided him into something more than adequate. I wish Bobby Roode was at ringside though for some more bickering, though.

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Joseph Park is backstage with Sting eating a giant pile of ribs. Park begs Sting to choose him, but Sting shrugs him off and catches up with Matt Morgan in the hallway. Sting asks Morgan to join “Team TNA”. Morgan says anyone who has anything to do with Hulk Hogan is guilty in his eyes and turns down Sting’s offer.

• THOUGHTS: Oh yeah Matt Morgan’s in TNA. I almost forgot. Good little spiel from him though and I’m glad he’s still holding his Hogan grudge even though that whole storyline is going nowhere. Park was fun as always, even though I’m getting super annoyed at the “Park misuses insider terms” schtick. It’s getting old.

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-Commercial Break-

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Kenny King is already in the ring for the next match. His opponent, X-Division Champion Rob Van Dam, makes his full entrance.

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Match #3: Rob Van Dam (c) Vs. Kenny King for the TNA X-Division Title

RVD connects with a couple of side headlock takedowns but King escapes with a headscissor each time. RVD with a waistlock into a side headlock. King whips RVD into the ropes but gets dropped with a high-hitting German suplex, almost snapping in half. King brushes it off and tells RVD to play to the crowd. RVD for some reason does and King dropkicks him out to the floor. King attempts the corkscrew splash but RVD moves and catches him with a springboard kick. RVD slams King face-first into the apron then crotches him on the barricade. RVD takes to the apron and hits the spinning legdrop. King falls into the front row as we go to commercial.

-Commercial Break-

RVD breaks out of a chinlock with a jawbreaker as come back from break. King responds with an enziguri for 2. King with the full mount as he repeatedly connects with right hands on the champion. King goes for the cover but only gets 2. King whips RVD into the corner but RVD gets his boot up during a corner splash attempt. RVD rolls King up with a bodyscissors for 2. RVD hits a rolling monkey flip but King lands on his feet. RVD drops him quickly however and follows it up with the Rolling Thunder. RVD heads to the top and misses a 450 splash for the 1…2…RVD gets his hand in the way and the ref doesn’t count three. Awkward. They rebound and King instead hits the Royal Flush for the emphatic 1…2…3. New champ!

Winner and NEW X-Division Champion [via Pinfall]: Kenny King (9:14)

• MATCH THOUGHTS: FIIIIIIIIIINAAAALLLLLY. Took them long enough. Good match overall until the final minute which got all sorts of screwy (RVD going for a 450 for some reason, Hebner not counting the three because he slapped RVD’s hand). But at least they finally are giving King an X-Division run.

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Kurt Angle catches up with Sting backstage. Sting shows Angle his “Team TNA” list and Angle is in disbelief at one of his picks. Sting says desperate times call for desperate measures and to trust him. Angle goes with it then they go their separate ways.

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-Commercial Break-

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Lethal Lockdown Teams Announced

Clips of the end of last week’s show plays (the Hulk Hogan attack, etc.). We then see a Twitter picture of a gash on Hogan’s leg (complete with Hogan mispelling “hell” as “he’ll”). The Aces and 8’s theme hits and out comes Devon and the crew (Mr. Anderson, D.O.C., Mike Knox, and Garett Bischoff). Devon grabs the mic and says this is the club that will dominate TNA in 2013. Devon says the same thing that happened at Bound For Glory will also happen at Lockdown. Devon tells Sting that he will be leading his team to the slaughter.

And speak of the devil, out comes “The Icon” and captain of Team TNA. Sting stays at the entrance stage. Sting announces his teammates for the Lethal Lockdown match: Samoa Joe, James Storm, Magnus, and finally, Sting’s “out of the box” pick…Eric Young. Young appears behind The Aces and 8’s and attacks, and the rest of Team TNA comes in to join in on the fracas. Team TNA clears the ring of The Aces and 8’s and they stare one another down as Sting’s music hits.

• SEGMENT THOUGHTS: I’ve been very iffy on Lockdown but I like these two teams so now my interest is piqued. I like Sting filling his team out with those The Aces and 8’s have attacked in the past and if the biker group is defeated on the show it’ll be in a nice “poetic justice” sort-of way.

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A Gut Check hype video plays for contestant #1 Ivalese Valez. She’s from Puerto Rico and trains in MMA. Her story involves a strained and now healed relationship with her mother and living on the streets. The Gut Check is up next.

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-Commercial Break-

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We see video from “Moments Ago” where The Aces and 8’s are leaving the building, furious at what just transpired in the ring. Kurt Angle shows up and tells the camera man to follow him as he hunts them down.

• THOUGHTS: You go get your creepy stalker on, Mr. Angle.

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A Gut Check hype video plays for contestant #2 Lei’d Tapa. She is the niece of wrestling sort-of legend The Barbarian. She starts tearing up as well and talks about her drive to become a wrestler.

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Jeremy Borash introduces the two Gut Check contestants to the ring.

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Match #4: Ivelisse Velez Vs. Lei’d Tapa in a “Gut Check Challenge”

Tapa goozles Velez but it’s reversed into an armdrag. Velez locks on a standing Guillotine Choke, but Tapa uses her strength to fight out. Tapa gets Velez in a Samoan drop position. Velez strikes her way out and transitions into a standing rear-naked choke. Tapa escapes and applies a wristlock. Velez kicks her way out but runs right into a big boot courtesy of Tapa. Tapa whips Velez into the ropes and drops Velez with a kneeling clothesline (because she’s so tall). Tapa bodyslams Velez then drops her again with a headbutt. Tapa whips Velez repeatedly into the corners, but misses a corner splash. Velez hits the Zema Ion-style DDT through the ropes to regain the offense. Velez ducks a clothesline and hits a standing hurricanrana to bring Tapa down to the mat. Tapa picks Velez up out of nowhere and hits a Samoan drop for the 1…2…kickout. Velez catches Tapa with another guillotine choke, this time with Tapa kneeling. After a brief struggle Tapa finally taps.

Winner [via Submission]: Ivelisse Velez (4:15)

• MATCH THOUGHTS: Okay enough match and both ladies looked good in the ring, but it’s almost toooooo convenient that they brought on an MMA-trained contestant given who they’re the lead-in for now.

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Austin Aries catches up with Jeff Hardy in the locker room. Aries tells Hardy he’s pulling for him at Lockdown because Bully Ray is the “golden boy”.

• THOUGHTS: Aries telling Hardy to do some “Hardy squats” then making fun of Hardy’s old arm-flailing entrance is the highlight of the night. Maybe I’m easier to please than I thought.

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-Commercial Break-

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An Update on AJ Styles

A video package plays comprised of interviews with his wife and his longtime friend. They both talk about how AJ Styles changed over the last year. The wife then walks off, saying it’s too personal. Styles walks in on his friend being interviewed, looking all sorts of unkempt. He quickly walks off then drives away on his motorcycle.

• THOUGHTS: I don’t think TNA intended for that AJ Styles video to be as funny as it was, but here I am laughing my head off. His quick retreat via motorcycle was the best part and was totally a Kenny Powers from Eastbound and Down hissy fit move. This may turn out to be unexpected comedy gold.

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STORYLINE RECAP: Robbie T outshines his “bro” Robbie E. Robbie E finally snaps last week, slapping his friend who just walks off in anger.

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Robbie E is standing in the ring, mic in hand. Robbie E says sometimes in life a bro has to admit when there’s a bigger and better bro. Robbie E says he has come to that realization and brings out his friend Robbie T, calling him by his full name Rob Terry. Robbie E opens up the velvet rope for Terry then holds the ropes open for his friend. Terry enters on an alternate side. Robbie E says their beef has gotten way out of hand and apologizes for slapping his last week, saying he “crossed the line”. Robbie E says them being friends for two years has meant the world to him and wants to show him how much Terry means to him. Robbie E tells Terry that he’s the better bro, bro. Robbie E asks for one more “Bro-Off” for old time’s sake. Robbie E does his little dance and Terry cracks a smile. Robbie E says Terry is the “Bro-Off Champion” and deserves the spotlight. The music starts and the lights get crazy as Terry takes his sweater off. Terry starts dancing but Robbie E runs in and smashes the “VIP Entrance” sign over his skull. Robbie E celebrates, but Terry stands with the frame still over his neck. Robbie E finally sees him and quickly bails out of the ring.

• THOUGHTS: Is it me or does TNA drag out “break up” segments every time they have them? First Tara/Tessmacher, then this. It’s obvious it’s going to happen, no need to keep it going longer than necessary. That aside I have no affinity for this gimmick or this team so I don’t really care that they broke up. But let’s hope Terry’s singles run goes a lot better than the last time.

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Austin Aries catches up with Bully Ray backstage who’s lifting weights. Aries tells Ray he’s pulling for him and Ray quickly no-sells it and says he’s not going to stir him up. Ray tells Aries to get used to wearing the Tag Team title because he won’t be wearing the World Title anytime soon. Ray tells Aries to get out of his face until he leaves. Ray calls him a “wiseass”.

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-Commercial Break-

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Kurt Angle is still stalking around backstage, saying he’s going to take the fight to The Aces and 8’s. He walks through a mysterious door, behind it I assume is the Aces and 8’s clubhouse.

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Bad Influence (Christopher Daniels & Frankie Kazarian) make their way out for the main event. Bully Ray and TNA World Champion Jeff Hardy make their way out next, each getting their own entrances.

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Main Event: *TNA World Champion* Jeff Hardy & Bully Ray Vs. Bad Influence (Christopher Daniels & Frankie Kazarian)

Ray and Daniels start off. Daniels with a knee to the breadbasket to start. Daniels chops Ray in the corner, but Ray brushes it off and drops him with a clothesline. Ray backs Daniels in the corner and hits a series of headbutts to the sternum followed by a loud open hand chop. Ray sends Daniels face-first into the corner and commences with another open hand chop. Kazarian interferes and gets a high back bodydrop for his troubles. That allows Daniels to attack Ray from behind and gain the advantage. Kazarian tags in and they double suplex Ray before celebrating with some Gangnam Style. Ray clotheslines both members of Bad Influence, does his own Gangnam Style then double Bionic Elbows. Hardy joins in and they clear the ring of Bad Influence, standing high as we go to commercial.

-Commercial Break-

Hardy is the legal man as we come back from break. Hardy sends Ray into Kazarian in the corner, then Hardy follows up with the Poetry in Motion. Daniels tries to attack from behind but they move and he runs into his own partner. Hardy goes for a Poetry in Motion on Daniels but Kazarian grabs his leg and allows Daniels to attack both and gain the advantage. Daniels sends Hardy into Kazarian’s boots then stomps a mudhole in Hardy. Kazarian tags in and Daniels hip tosses him onto Hardy for a 2-count. Hardy breaks out a hold but Kazarian pushes him back to the Bad Influence corner. Daniels tags in and connects with a headbutt. Daniels gets Hardy in the sidewalk slam position and Kazarian hits him with a springboard legdrop for 1…2…kickout. Daniels works Hardy over in the corner then whips him to the opposite side. Hardy catches Daniels with an elbow then hits the Whisper in the Wind. Both men are down.

Ray gets the hot tag and lays waste to Daniels with a couple of clotheslines followed by a back bodydrop for him and Kazarian. Ray connects with the Urinage for 2. Kazarian tries to come off the top, but Ray grabs him and launches him off with a slam. Ray takes Daniels down with a sidewalk slam and covers him for the 1…2..Kazarian tags in. Ray knocks Kazarian out to the floor then tags Hardy. Hardy goes for the Swanton but Kazarian crotches him while the ref is distracted. Daniels takes Ray out with an enziguri then connects with an STO on Hardy for the 1…2…kickout. Ray pushes Kazarian off in the corner then connects with a big boot. Ray chops the back of Daniels, who has a corner mount on Hardy. Ray drops Daniels with an electric chair and Hardy comes off the top with the Swanton for the 1…2…3!

Winners [via Pinfall]: Jeff Hardy & Bully Ray (11:05)

• MATCH THOUGHTS: Fun main event and Bully Ray proves that he can team with anybody and make it exciting. Weird that there’s absolutely no tension going on between Hardy and Ray though; not that there needs to be a lot, but they’re just sort-of whatever about each other.

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Kurt Angle beats on The Aces and 8’s members in the clubhouse then goes face to face with the last masked member. Angle smashes a bottle over his head then unmasks him out of view. Angle stares in disbelief at who it is, who we can’t see. The other Aces and 8’s attack Angle from behind and beat him down as we cut to Bellator.

• THOUGHTS: Now that was an old-school prime time TV cliffhanger right there. Awesome. I know a lot of people will roll their eyes but I dug that. Keep the mystique going for another week.

RANDOM OVERALL SHOW THOUGHTS: A much better show than in the past four weeks and after the damage done on last week’s show it made excited once again to potentially pay for Lockdown. No bad matches (just awkward botches) and no bad storyline segments so I consider this a success. And you know what? I’m gonna miss the Impact Zone. There I said it, and I’ll probably say it again when they officially start touring.

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If you like the cut of Jon’s wrestling jib he can be found ranting and raving in 140 characters or less on Twitter while he slowly, and he means SLOWLY, works on a brand spankin’ new website to be launched…eventually.