Into the Indies 02.22.11: Not That There’s Anything Wrong with That

Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, to Into the Indies, the column that is nowhere near the road to Wrestlemania.

Every now and again, there is one match so potentially epic, so potentially over the top that I have to devote an entire column to that single bout. We’re here today to talk about one of those matches.

The bout took place on January 23, 2011 in Tokyo’s Korakuen Hall as part of an event entitled “Fantastica Mania,” which was a co-promotion between New Japan Pro Wrestling and Mexico’s CMLL. Fantastica Mania actually encompassed two nights of professional wrestling which featured many of the top stars of CMLL being imported to New Japan to do battle with that company’s roster. There were some epic clashes between the two nights, including matches featuring the legendary Jushin Liger, bouts involving CMLL’s top drawing card Mistico, NJPW’s Rysuke Taguchi beating CMLL’s Mascara Dorado for the CMLL World Welterweight Title, and plenty more interpromotional bouts.

However, as soon as the lineups were announced, there was one match that stood out to me more than any other. It was a tag team match, with veteran NJPW grapplers (and bookers) Jado and Gedo going up against a duo unlike any that they had never faced before.

The first half of the team? Maximo. A representative of CMLL, Maximo is the latest in a long line of luchadores to have success with the so-called “exotico” gimmick, a routine in which a male wrestler adopts effeminate hairstyles, mannerisms, and makeup and generally acts, for a lack of a better term, as stereotypically gay as possible. Though something of this nature probably could not be done in the United States without inspiring a fair deal of homophobia, exoticos have such a rich history in professional wrestling that both babyface and heel versions can now exist, with the babyface exoticos getting great reactions as undercard good guys. The more talented and/or established face exoticos even break out into the main events from time to time. The concept has existed since at least the early 1970s, where names like Babe Sharon and Adorable Rubi established a tradition that Maximo currently maintains. Maxio’s not just a gimmick, though, as he is a very talented in-ring performer and a third generation wrestler, part of the enormous “Brazo family” that includes numerous legendary grapplers. Specifically, he is the son of Brazo de Plata, a.k.a. Super Porky.

The second half of the team? Danshoku Dino. Though exoticos in their purest form don’t really exist in Japanese wrestling, Dino is just as outrageous, if not more so. We’ve seen plenty of Dino’s antics in I2I before, including matches in which he relished the thought of getting his opponent into the amateur down position, matches in which he pantomimed tea bagging men, and matches in which he defended the GAY World Anal Title. Dino’s entire offense is essentially based on forcing homosexual advances on his opponents, to the point that things get just a little bit uncomfortable. Originally I wasn’t a huge fan of the character, because if this same gimmick were done in the United States, I would see it has reinforcing negative stereotypes about gays, namely that they’re oversexed and want to try to force their lifestyle on heterosexual men. (For the record, they’re not and they don’t.) However, it has subsequently been explained to me that similar stereotypes are not prevalent in Japan and that a character like Dino is almost revered for being so far outside of the mainstream and bucking contemporary mores. That made it much easier to enjoy his character for what it was.

So, yes, it is the ultimate team-up. The uber-gay grappler from the eastern hemisphere paired with the uber-gay grappler from the western hemisphere. Let’s take a look at the action and see if they’re up to their old tricks or if they’ve decided to play it straight for once.

Danshoku Dino & Maximo vs. Jado & Gedo (NJPW/CMLL Fantastica Mania, 01/23/2011)

Maximo and Dino make their entrance through the audience, with Dino stopping periodically to French kiss random people in the audience, including a baby (yes, a baby) and wrestler-turned-announcer Milano Collection AT, who is so deeply affected by the liplock that he passes out and has to be carried to the back. Brilliant.

Maximo and Gedo start the match after Jado and Gedo argue a bit over who is actually going to have to get into the ring. Gedo is not too happy about coming out on the losing end of that one, so he slaps Maximo twice, resulting in some girlish screams, after which he pulls down the strap on Maximo’s gear, exposing a nipple and causing the luchadore to act indignant. (Funny because he’s only got one strap on his gear, meaning that the other nipple is always exposed.) Gedo shoots Maximo into the ropes, and the Mexican star ducks a lariat, coming back with a springboard armdrag and then a few grounded variations of the move, followed by a dropkick. Gedo rolls out and Maximo fakes a dive. Jado and Dino come in at this point, engaging in an exchange where Jado hits a chop, followed by Dino no-selling it and rubbing his hand over Jado’s crotch. Danshoku follows up by grabbing Jado’s hand and placing it on his own trunks, and that’s when Jado has had just about enough, attacks full force, and sends the DDT wrestler out of the ring and down to the arena floor.

Dino tries to reenter the ring but Jado repeatedly chops him as he stands on the apron, causing Dino to take another bump down on to the floor. When he finally does get back in between the ropes, Jado throws him into Gedo’s boot and makes a tag. Jado is back in quickly for a double shoulderblock, and Dino rolls to the floor again. Maximo runs into the ring to take up the mantle for his partner, but Jado blinds him by running his eyes over the top rope and sends him into the buckles. Gedo takes over at this point, tearing at the exotico’s face and putting the boots to him. Jado checks back in and, in a surprising move, basically hands Maximo a tag out to Dino. It doesn’t really matter at first, as Jado continues to dominate Dino with chops until Danshoku starts to Hulk up in a disturbing manner that includes shoving his hand down the front of his pants and pantomiming masturbation. Apparently it’s not all that effective, though, as when Dino and Maximo team up for a Hogan-esque point and “YOU!” spot, Jado just takes Dino right back down and tags out to Gedo.

The 1995 Super J Cup standout hits a swinging neckbreaker on Dino for a nearfall followed by some knees to the head and a back elbow, causing Dino to go to the floor again. I guess that’s a lucha tag, as Maximo checks in and catches an interfering Jado off guard with a rana. From there he does the lucha spot where he leg sweeps Gedo into doing a dropkick on Jado, followed up with a big sit-out powerbomb on Gedo for a nearfall. A scoop slam sets up Maximo going to the top rope, but Gedo rolls out of the way to avoid a senton atomico. After Maximo crashing and burning, Gedo superkicks him in the face, but Dino runs in and breaks up the pinfall by striking Gedo in the head with his penis. No kidding. Jado runs into go after Dino, but Danshoku dry humps him and grabs his junk. The referee tries to break the hold, so Dino goes after his junk as well and kisses him square on the lips. If there’s one thing that makes reviewing Dino matches interesting, it’s that you type a lot of sentences that you never thought you would type before. While Dino is busy doing his thing with the referee, Jado tries to sneak up from behind with a German suplex, but Dino low blows him and rolls him up with la majistrahl. It gets two as Gedo saves.

Now we’re back to Maximo and Jado as the focus, and Maximo almost immediately tosses his man to the floor and wipes him out with a tope suicida before giving a big thumbs up. Gedo and Dino continue to go at it in the ring, with Gedo missing a lariat and getting kissed. A second lariat is also ducked, leading to the same result, and Dino pulls down his pants, no doubt looking for something that would have brought the match to a close. Unfortunately for him, it’s hard to maneuver around the ring with your trunks around your ankles, so Gedo is able to catch him from behind with a crippler crossface that causes Dino to submit, giving the win to the NJPW home boys.

After the bell, Dino goes after Milano again, but he’s wised up this time and hides behind another member of the announce team. Then the dream team cuts a promo backstage, and the Japanese subtitles on Maximo’s bits of the speech are all punctuated by cartoon hearts. I guess that in some way denotes homosexuality.

Overall

I have to admit, I went into this bout expecting a lot more than it actually delivered. I didn’t think that it would get a heck of a lot of time, because it was the opening match on a show that featured some main event level matches that looked excellent on paper, but I figured that they would be able to do much more with the time that they were given in terms of bringing the laughs. I think that part of the problem is that Dino either has to or at least feels that he has to tune down his schtick somewhat when he’s on the bigger stage of New Japan Pro Wrestling as opposed to working in DDT, the small indy group where he is a regular. Another possibility, I suppose, is that he realizes that fewer NJPW fans have seen him work, meaning that he thinks he can get away with holding back some of the more outrageous spots he’s had to resort to for fans who see him once or twice a month. Whatever the reason for it, a much more reserved Dino was a big reason why this came off a bit flat in my book. Another issue was with Jado and Gedo, as the appeared to be so concerned with coming off like badasses that they didn’t go really over the top with comedic selling of their opponent’s antics, which is something that is crucial to taking a match like this from “average” to “excellent.”

Despite the fact that its quality disappointed me somewhat, I will say that I am still very glad that this match occurred. First of all, it is always great to see an indy guy who I watch on a regular basis like Dino getting a little bit more due and an opportunity to shine in the big leagues. Plus, even though they didn’t get to do too much with their respective gimmicks, it is still somewhat amusing for fans of the two wrestlers to say that he and Maximo formed a team for one night only, even if it wound up being fodder for trivia and not much worthwhile beyond that.

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