wrestling / Columns

The Wrestling 5 & 1 03.09.13: Velvet Sky and Stacy Keibler!

March 9, 2013 | Posted by Tony Acero

We’re 30-somethin days away from Mania, and there’s tons to talk about! Leggo!

BRING ON THE GIRLS!

The Versus Royal Rumble
With Tony Acero

It’s the lady section of the column, the part where you don’t have to read, and only have to ogle!

Stacy is moving right along, beating Maria and moving forward and upward, but not without trouble! She barely edged out a win this week, taking the reign by only 30 freakin votes!

After the defeat of Maria, Stacy heads to the top rung of the Hall and faces….VELVET!!!

Vs.

VOTE NOW!

The poll expires Tuesday night, and you can vote once every 12 hours. Now get voting!

Last week in The Wrestling 5&1…

We get it, you don’t like Zeb Coulter and seemingly enjoy whining about the angle. Face facts man, everything.. EVERYTHING.. he said on Raw resonates through a HUGE portion of the Country, from Carolina to Idaho, from the battle borders in New Mexico up to Iowa and over to Kentucky and Ohio. The “blue states” which is the majority of the south and entire midwest, have those thoughts and opinions. Everything he said on Raw, had he been in Ohaha Ne, Lexington Ky, Nashville Tn, West Memphis Ark, Demoines, etc.. he’d get more cheers than what he got in Texas this last week. Whether you enjoy it or not, or want to call it a “:caricature” of sorts, bottom line is what he says is the TRUTH to MILLIONS of Americans, and millions of wrestling fans. Instead of using your forum to whine and complain and add more negativitiy to wrestling (because the IWC is wholly negative), perhaps you should support the E for trying to bring something REAL to wrestling as part of the show. – Drew

There’s this molehill, right? And you totes made it into a mountain of epic proportions. Who the hell enjoys whining? Not once did I deny the resonation of Zeb’s promo. I simply stated how it has gone from a multi-layered, multi-faceted story into a simple one, lacking any substance and actual validity. Sure, many people may agree with the dude, and that’s all fine and well. The reality of it is that I compared the promo from the week prior – which had pathos – to the one from the following week, which was simplistic writing and subpar storytelling. And it appears you truly haven’t been reading the 5&1 for long, because telling Tony Acero to not add more negativity to wrestling is like telling a blind kid to open their fucking eyes and see! I do what I want, not what you want. Unless you’re AJ…

Everyone else really focused on the Divas or had a conversation within the section – and I deeeeeeply encourage that! Keep on keepin on!

This topic isn’t new in the slightest. I believe we all have a lot to say about the midcard of the WWE, and the problems that it possesses. The WWE doesn’t have a structured hierarchy of weights, as it focuses more on star power. We’ve also noticed that although we want practically EVERYONE to be a star, the spotlight can only shine on so many. But looking at Wrestlemania and realizing that sooo many wrestlers haven’t a road to walk on en route is really disappointing. Ziggler, Cesaro, Barrett, none of these guys have something set in stone (and TWO are champions!). Rhodes, Sandow, the Prime Time Players, and all those tag teams we thought were being built up into something have all but dissipated into nothingness. I will not reach back to the past and point out how well it was done at one point, but I will stress that this thing is fixable! Since I am no good at armchair booking (actually, I’m just lazy), I’ll leave that up to you and instead focus on the issues.

I am the oldest of six. My parents put a lot of focus on me and my sister of two years younger. We are both, arguably, relatively successful. We are, in a sense, the main event of the WWE my parents have created. Unfortunately for the third child, so much attention was focused on making the main event better that the midcard of my family began to become unimportant and lash out (thankfully, not on Twitter). As you look down the card, one can see the holes in the structure of both my familial unit and the WWE’s roster. With so much energy spent on the main event, my parents got tired and began slipping a bit. Simply put, there needs to be a focus on – not just the main event – but the roster as a whole, otherwise your product is only subpar. The WWE has their middle children that they seem to want to continue to put down one day, and attempt to rescue them the next day. But as many of you who have a (or are the) middle sibling, there comes a point where it’s too little, too late.

Both Antonio Cesaro and Wade Barrett hold ready-made feud enhancers around their waist. Sometimes, the easiest answer is the best one, and having someone focus solely on the belt that either one of these guys possess is enough to create a great Wrestlemania match. We can see shades of Sheamus and Barrett turning into something bigger –and it may very well culminate into a match at Mania, but the beginning of it seemed both abrupt and forced. They chose to focus on a promotion rather than a title. In a sorry attempt to put more eyes on a movie, they sacrificed a story that grew organically for an out of nowhere “Oscar review” from Sheamus. Sure, it’s not a battle over shampoo, but even that didn’t seem FORCED as much as this one does. As for Cesaro, he’s been in a holding pattern of losing to a main eventer, then attempting to become relevant by beating someone lower on the food chain than him. The belt – one that he has held for over 200 days – is hardly mentioned or cared about and is, instead, used as a gimmick enhancer instead of a feud enhancer.

And what of Ziggler? The hopeful Tony thinks that come Mania, Dolph will cash in and get a great moment of his own, but where is the air of possibility? It’s nowhere when Ziggler is loving left and right, causing the inevitable cash-in to start off as a fluke. The cheers can be heard, but I question how long before people tire of Ziggler. He truly hasn’t done anything of significance for quite some time.

One can really feel the burn out of the midcard by watching the product as of now. We are in Wrestlemania season, and I have to ask…are any of you excited? And if not, is that due to our jaded view of the product? I’ve been writing for 411 for over two years now but have been a fan for a long, long time, and I don’t recall being this apathetic for a Mania, ever. I don’t think it’s the predictability that some have complained about, and I don’t think it’s that we are jaded. I think it’s that we lack characters to latch onto, and stories to enjoy. This year feels almost robotic, both in the build and in the fandom. We are a conditioned group – whether we like it or not – and are going to watch. But most of the time, it’s the trip we take to get to Mania that we enjoy the most, and recently it feels like just another day in Wrestling history.

We know this is due to many reasons, but I think it starts with the focus on children that have already moved on with their lives, instead of the ones that are still at home, yearning for the spotlight. The Rock, Triple H, The Undertaker, Chris Jericho – they are the elder siblings, with no need to be raised or nurtured. They have their own places, and although it’s nice (and very comfortable) when they visit home, the parental unit tends to simply forget about the rest of the kids running around, just craving attention (right, Ryder?) and instead goes through the motions of what they were used to.

The midcard needs your help, WWE.

You Decide: With the main events already in place, give me the lowercard of Mania, with a story of some sort for each match presented.

Wrestlemania Projections
With Greg DeMarco

After Monday’s Raw, this year’s WrestleMania card is starting to take shape. Greg DeMarco takes a closer look.

After Monday’s Raw, the WWE is less than five weeks away from WrestleMania 29. Taking place on Sunday, April 7 from Met Life Stadium in East Rutherford, New Jersey, WrestleMania is sure to draw a packed house—full of rockin’ fans.

What will the WWE give those fans? Let’s have a look…

Confirmed

WWE Championship – The Rock (champion) vs. John Cena
CM Punk vs. The Undertaker
World Heavyweight Championship – Alberto Del Rio (champion) vs. Jack Swagger

For better or worse, we know these matches are going to happen. And don’t even try to complain about last year’s “Once In A Lifetime” tag line. It’s professional wrestling—get over it!

Assumed

Triple H vs. Brock Lesnar

Triple H issued the challenge on Raw, and it would make Brock look bad if he said no. This will happen.

Projected

The Shield of Dean Ambrose, Seth Rollins & Roman Reigns vs. Sheamus, Randy Orton & The Big Show
Mark Henry vs. Ryback

The Shield called out Sheamus, Orton & Show before they even lost in their bid to challenge The Streak at WrestleMania. Expect this match to happen, and expect it to be a memorable portion of the card. The Henry-Ryback staredown most likely means they’re going to face off at WrestleMania—and we could see Ryback’s first “WrestleMania Moment.”

Fantasy Booking

WWE Tag Team Championships – Team Hell No vs. The Prime Time Players

These two teams have already met countless times, but Michael Cole called it a “feud” on WWE television. While it hardly fits the bill, it’s the only clue we have.

Two Falls, Two Titles – United States Champion Antonio Cesaro vs. Intercontinental Champion Wade Barrett vs. Chris Jericho vs. The Miz.

At WrestleMania 16, Jericho was part of a two-fall, triple threat match for Kurt Angle’s Intercontinental and European Championships. Angle left with nothing, as Jericho and Chris Benoit each scored a fall. Given that there isn’t anything better for these four guys to do, I say put them in the ring and let them entertain us for two falls!

#1 Contender Match – Team Rhodes Scholars vs. The New Age Outlaws vs. Tensai & Brodus Clay vs. The Usos vs. Primo & Epico vs. Kofi Kingston & R-Truth

This easily could be turned into a battle royal, with The Prime Time Players thrown in, with the winners getting a shot at Team Hell No later in the evening. As long as we get Rosa Mendes on the card!

Dolph Ziggler vs. No One

That’s right! I don’t think Ziggler should have a match—it sells the Money In The Bank briefcase. Michael Cole appeared to carefully say “world title” when indicating how Ziggler could cash in. It wouldn’t surprise me to see him cash in on Cena after the match against The Rock. It gives us a feud for the spring/summer, and gives Cena another reason to face The Rock at WrestleMania 30 or 31.

Divas Championship – Kaitlyn (champion) vs. Layla

Honestly, there aren’t any other good options. Turn Layla heel and have her put Kaitlyn over. Then use some time after WrestleMania to rebuild the division. It can’t happen over the next five weeks. Another option could be a mixed tag that sees Kaitlyn team with Cody Rhodes against Damien Sandow and Layla.

You Decide: How would you fill out the rest of the Wrestlemania card? What do you want to see the company do with Dolph Ziggler?

“The Wrong Man Won”
With Greg DeMarco

As we travel down the “Road to WrestleMania,” looking back at the biggest (and our favorite) moments in WrestleMania history is a necessary part of getting ready for the next “biggest card ever.” In doing so, I recently saw highlights of Andre The Giant being carted to the ring at WrestleMania III, being showered with cups, bottles and other trash as he approached what was, at the time, the biggest match of all time.
It made me realize what a huge missed opportunity we had at WrestleMania III—and sub sequentially WrestleMania IV…

Andre should have won!

I know it’s crazy to suggest that the heel should have won at the biggest event in the company’s history. Hell, it would be 13 years before a heel would actually leave WrestleMania as the main event winner when Triple H did it at WrestleMania 16 (aka “WrestleMania 2000” aka “WrestleMania”), and The Miz did it at WrestleMania 27.

The signature moment of their WrestleMania III match is Hulk Hogan bodyslamming Andre The Giant—a moment that will forever live in the memories of old school fans around the world. But imagine if Hogan failed, and Andre flattened out the WWF’s biggest star, scoring the pinfall and securing the WWF Championship.
In 1988, house shows were filled with fans that still believed anything could happen on any show. The house show circuit would have been amazing after WrestleMania III, with fans flocking to the arenas to see if Hogan could finally slam the Giant and regain his title. Andre would continue to retain his championship in matches involving a count-out or disqualification, but not after Hogan came within a hair of regaining the prized belt. Fans would leave salivating for more.

WrestleMania IV featured a face turn for “Macho Man” Randy Savage, a moment that would have had to happen two months earlier at The Main Event if Andre was champion. Instead of causing controversy that would lead to the title being vacant, Savage would earn the title shot against Andre, nearly winning the title in a bout mired with controversy thanks to Ted Dibiase buying off the referees in an effort to keep the belt on Andre.

The story would remain the same, jus shifted in time. Andre’s promise would be to sell the title to Dibiase after a yearlong reign—after WrestleMania V. It would be up to Hogan to regain the title to prevent this from happening. At WMV, Savage would face (and defeat) Dibiase in the semi-main event, solidifying his face turn. Savage would get his big win at SummerSlam, beating Hulk Hogan for the WWF Championship and going on to face The Ultimate Warrior at WrestleMania VI. There’d be no jealousy, no tossing Elizabeth down to the floor backstage—none of that.

History would eventually reset itself into what we have today. But if Hulk Hogan had lost to Andre The Giant at WrestleMania III, we would have a history that includes seeing Andre The Giant as a legitimate WWF Champion, and a much earlier WrestleMania main event rematch.

Sometimes one alteration to history can mean big things in the long-run. Better things? I’ll let you be the judge.

You Decide: Should Andre The Giant have defeated Hulk Hogan at WrestleMania III?

Death is a topic that is tough for a variety of people, and although I can joke (for quite a while, actually) about the fact that this would probably be Paul Bearer’s 7th death, it’s unfortunate that this isn’t scripted, and the Booker of life doesn’t have rewrites. A beloved character from the wrestling world has left us for good, and truly he was one of those guys that I don’t think ANYONE had anything bad to say. From the past, before he donned the dark hair and ugly scowl, to the most recent stint in the WWE, Paul Bearer was a staple of the product and that high-pitched voice will never be replaced. Rest In Peace, friend.

You Decide: Favorite Paul Bearer memory?

Las Vegas’s own Suede Thompson made his first appearance on the show. Suede talked about how he got into wrestling, being trained by Alison Danger, life living on the Las Vegas strip and more! Want to hear how Suede makes a first impression? Hint: it involves a hang glider. This is one interview you don’t want to miss!
Fresh off of the set of the upcoming Martin Scorsese movie “The Wolf of Wall Street,” The Guilty Pleasure Leanne Marie returns to the show to discuss filming sex scenes with Jonah Hill, the body suit that (unfortunately!) added body hair, her upcoming Playboy Golf appearance and more! Leanne is always a must listen, as the mere sound of her voice drives Patrick O’Dowd wild!

Rebounding from last week’s technical difficulty fiasco, Su Yung spends over 20 minutes with the guys, talking about absolutely nothing and having a blast doing it! Su’s appearance is proof that the more you plan out an appearance, the less those plans are needed. Don’t miss Su’s discussion on this week’s show.
Plus, Chad Perry joins Greg and Patrick for a review of the relevance of the WWE Hall of Fame, and thoughts on some potential future Hall of Famers. Tune in to find out what type of chances the crew gives to the Hall of Fame potential of people like Lita, Rob Van Dam, The Dudleys and more!

Justin Freemyer returns with another edition of “This Week in Wrestling History.” This week’s is an expanded edition to make up for lost time!

Listen here!

Listen to internet radio with Wrestling Smash on Blog Talk Radio

About The Greg DeMarco Show:

Greg DeMarco isn’t just a must-read wrestling analyst (via http://www.411wrestling.com and http://www.bleacherreport.com) with a copious amount of sound bites on his show. Greg brings several years of experience within the wrestling business—as well as eight years of stand-up and improvisational comedy experience—to the masses each week.

He’s joined each week by best friend “The Wrestling Realist” Patrick O’Dowd. Not just another sidekick, Patrick balances hard-hitting commentary with an innate ability to provoke Greg in ways that very few can. These two best friends collaborate to provide the most entertaining wrestling program on the planet, and do so while breaking down the product in ways that no one else can.

The Greg DeMarco Show is streams LIVE each Tuesday night at 10 pm eastern/7 pm pacific at SmashWrestling.com or on the show’s Blog Talk Radio channel blogtalkradio.com/gregdemarco.

You can reach the show via e-mail at [email protected] and on Facebook by searching for “Greg DeMarco Show.”