The Sunday Kick-Off Wrestling News Report: 11.12.06

During this report, i will try to keep to Small’s regular format so as not to confuse the Small-a-holics.

So for the first time in a few weeks i actually watched Raw and well, i guess i haven’t missed much. The best thing on Raw seems to be Crime Tyme and well their really only on TV for like a total of 10 minutes.

The 252 Words or Less WEAK in Review

On Raw, the opening segment was cool because, well Eric Bischoff can still cut an awesome heel GM promo and Orton didn’t spend too much on the mic. Lita looked too much like a man-whore for me nomatter how much cleavage she is willing to show. Flair’s promo was ok but nothing special and Piper took some good shots. We also had a terrible follow up to the IC Title divison with another title switch and Nitro as Champ. DX continue to bore the hell out of me and if they don’t add a new member, change the booking or just disband and get the HHH HBK feud over and done with, you know its gonna happen. K-Fed’s promo and challenge was decent as well, he cut a better promo than Orton which Vince should find worrying. It’s also amazing how in Wrestling if your a face automatically you become friends with all the other faces and heels always seem to be friends with all the other heels. Wasn’t it just a few months ago that the HHH Flair feud finally finished, well just before Mania, but on Raw HHH seemed to have no problem with Flair at all.

But the best thing on Raw this week was Cryme Tyme. Their commentry was awesome and then their removal of Shelton’s “Bling Bling” was brilliant. I Hope they can keep booking these guys well and maybe even get the Tag Team division booked well. SHelton and Haas against Cryme Tyme, now that’s COOL.

I did download (411 doesn’t support illegal downloading, but technically its not illegal if they already show it on tv and i download it to watch it just the way i would record it) ECW And Smackdown but just never got to watch any of those shows even though i do generally enjoy both of those shows more than Raw.

From the spoilers, Impact sounded hillarious although not as much fun as last weeks show when Byers seemed like he was gonna have an annurism at any moment.

Show of the week? Technically seeing as i only watched Raw this week that would be it.

Just a couple of thoughts. Am i the only one, or does anyone else think that had Cena or Big Show’s titles been voted at Cyber Sunday they probably would of ended up winning the match.

Also, i cant believe certain people have been calling for the WWE to have put the Cena K-Fed match on PPV. First off, do you know how awful that would be. Secondly, only 6000 people bought the guys album (hell, who knows, maybe those were all picked up by Britney) so i don’t think its going to pop any sort of buyrate. THis match could probably be used as sort of a build up for the impending Cena Umaga feud.

WWE NEWZ OF THE WEAK DOODZ!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Probably the biggest WWE news of the week, and it has been a slow one, was the announcement of the impending divorce between K-Fed and Britney. Apparantly Britney cracked up laughing when she saw the anthology of K-Fed’s WWE career which lead to Big K flipping out and turning heel on her.

How much you wanna bet that this is a work and VInce is booking this whole thing.

Announced Survivor Series Matches

-John Cena, Kane, RVD, Sabu, and Bobby Lashley vs. The Big Show, Finlay, Test, Umaga, and MVP

-Shawn Michaels, Triple H, Jeff Hardy, Matt Hardy, and C.M.Punk vs. Edge, Randy Orton, Johnny Nitro, Gregory Helms, and Mike Knox

-Ric Flair, Roddy Piper, Sgt. Slaughter and Dusty Rhodes w/Arn Anderson vs. The Spirit Squad (Kenny, Johnny, Mikey and Nicky) w/Mitch

-US Title Match: Chavo Guerrero vs Chris Benoit

-World Heavyweight Title Match: King Booker vs Batista

So far not a bad card. THe Hardy Boyz, DX and CM Punk should be an interesting team but with all the supposed heat CM Punk has with DX i wouldn’t be too surprised if he’s the first one eliminated by the IWC’s favourite Randy Orton.

Kane really needs to retire now as well they guy totally sucks and by the way whoever voted for Kane at Cyber Sunday is a total FUCKING RETARD who deserves to get the JBL shower treatment from the man himself. Also, that heel team apart from Big Show and Finlay really is a suck-fest, actually throw in Big Show to the suck-fest part. I just hope Finlay can stay in and keep this match interesting. They should of had the Little Bastard on that team as well. Also wouldn’t Hardcore Holly make more sense on that team since he turned on RVD last Tueday.

The Legends against the Spirit Squad match really shouldn’t be on here but if they keep it short and let Dusty work his magic it could be enjoyable. I also hope that with the breakup of the Squad they don’t toally bury them and allow Mikey and Johnny to get out of this gimmick with a little dignity. Management seem to be high on Kenny so he won’t be totally buried on Sunday, i just hope Mikey and JOhhny get protected as well. By the way, expect Mitch to be released soon seeing as he’s the only one of the squad not in the match and has the least ring exposure.

If they can actually keep this Chavo Benoit feud about anything other than Eddie then this could go much much better than the Chavo Rey one did, even though that wasn’t as horrible as some people tend to think. I’m looking forward to this match as it should be decent.

Well the last 3 or 4 contests between the King and Botch-tista have not been too pretty. I’m hoping we don’t see a title change here and they allow the Royal One to keep his Gold and momentum.

Diva News

In news that i don’t give a shit about and i find to be totally pointless. Witht hat being said, i still kind of have to report it seeing as Jeff Small took the time to report Vito’s appearance in Playgirl, but that could easily have been a piece of news that excited out favourite Heat recapper. What was my point, oh yeah ofcourse, Ashley Messaro, to all of our shock and surprise, will be posing in Playboy sometime next year. Expect Ashley to win the Womens Title sometime around that monumental event.

Top Level Star Asks for Brand Switch

SmackDown star Bobby Lashley has asked WWE officials to move him to another brand. Reportedly, he doesn’t get along at all with the new SmackDown head writer, Michael Hayes. The word going around is that Hayes doesn’t see much value in Lashley, and Lashley dislikes Hayes as well. Also, they have been involved in several backstage arguments in recent weeks. Lashley’s push has lessened greatly to say the least ever since his title match with No Mercy with King Booker was suddenly turned into a four-way match because WWE had little confidence in him headling a PPV by himself.

PW Insider

Well this is quite the big news. If Lashley gets his wish it would be a good move for ECW but a huge setback for the Blue Brand. Smackdown can’t afford to lose any of its roster and Lashley, although still a little lacking, would be a massive loss. If it was Hayes’s decision to change the No Mercy main event to the Fatal Fourway then i can see how and why Lashley would be pissed with him. THis will be interesting as you Know Heyman would probably love to have Lashley as one of his Extremists.

Castagnoli signs WWE Development Deal

APparantly this is both good because the dude will get loads of exposure and its also bad because he’s really talented and will now need to work the WWE style which means he’ll probably be stuck with a crappy gimmick and buried. I dont know much about this guy, actually i dont know anything this guy because I dont watch ROH regularly and I’ve never seen the guy wrestle.

TNA NEWZ OF THE WEAK DOODETTES!!!

Angle is kind of screwed up. In his most recent appearance on the Bubba Love Show Angle made reference that he would kick Puder’s ass and then afterwards he’ll “pull his shorts and rub his balls in Puder’s face……..knocks Puder out he would let Karen (his wife) go in the ring to piss and shit on Puder’s face”. He also says he’s been training for MMA and it will show in his TNA fights. Also, if that wasn’t enough, he stated that he believes that he is on the same level as Tito Ortiz.

So now that Angle has totally lost it, a few questions pop up:
1 – When will he the comparisons with the Ultimate Warrior start;
2 – what is Angle taking?
3 – With 3 weeks in the limelight and free of WWE and VInce’s control, Angle hasn’t said too many intelligent things. YOu gotta wonder how the hell Vince was able to keep Angle from coming across as a total headcase for his entire WWE tenure.

TNA are close to securing a TV deal to air Impact in Mexico. THis is very good news as it means the company and product will get more exposure. Plus more people will then get to see the Fight For Your Right tournament. Man that was an awesome idea in the same way Big Dick Johnson is an awesome idea if you get what i mean.

Another TNA Show was canceled Friday night due to building inspectors showing upto the Building and refused to allow the show to take place due to safety fears. TNA took the opportunity to record some footage of this with the fans outside the building also chanting “F*** VInce McMahon”.

source: www.TNAWrestlingNews.com

Now seriously, doesn’t this sound like somehting Russo would do. I know suspicious mind and all, but wasn’t it Russo who once stated that alot of his booking decision are based on getting people talking about the product. Now granted having a show shut down isn’t the best sort of publicity but since it is in Conneticut and the WWE is based out of Conneticut you can see where TNA could go with this, especially the with the crowds reaction.

Apparantly, a police officer told one of the TNA officials, with regards to the phone call made to inspectors, “You know you have a competitor up here who isn’t making your life easy”.

Now for Something Extra

Just for an outside plug, a friend of mine is now 4 matches into his Wrestling Career, check out his MySpace page here and his matches on You Tube here.

You can view a video Highlights package (that he made himself) below:

COMING ATTRACTIONS

Small should be back next week. In all seriousness, I hope this is report has been half as good as Small’s stuff because that guy does write very good stuff.

Cook had your Thursday news as well as the result of the Great Positity Debate.

Not only did Larry have to recap the rediculous Cyber Sunday he also decided to break it down and give it the Scott Rutherfood covered the Saturday News.

Bayani had a good look at Championships in the business today and what they have been made to mean

ALso have a look at the SPorts ZOne for all your awesomeness in Sports. Also this Thursday should see the return of the Thursday Kick-Off after a 6 week hiatus. I know all you Kick-Off fans have been waiting for ages for that news and now most of you will need to change your pants……go for it.