Column of Honor: 07.14.07 Second Anniversary Column Part Two

Hero’s Sandwich

Greetings and salutations once again my Hero-ites, it is I, your role model, your trend setter, your overall lifestyle icon, Chris Hero, back for another installment of the greatest segment known to man, the Hero’s Sandwich. Just to let you know in advance, I’m going to have to keep this week’s segment short and to the point as I am a very busy guy right now as I’m in Florida for the annual Jeff Peterson Memorial Tournament. Sure, it’s a charity event, and I’m not going to be as handsomely rewarded for my services as usual, but that’s okay from time to time, because I’m a giver… I’m also giving a seminar today on the ins and outs of the business and the ring, so if you’re in Port Richey, Florida, come on by and get a little slice of my wisdom, for a small fee, if you know what I mean. Since I’ve already won my first match of the tournament, I’m feeling quite confident that this tournament is mine for the taking, so that’s pretty sweet. I mean, I’d much rather be working the Japan shows this week, but hey, a pay check is a pay check, and even I’m okay with doing a “benefit” type gig from time to time, so its all good.

Now, onto bigger and better things. So, as I was surfing the ‘net this week, I stopped by ROHWrestling.com for a second, and what did I find? A little article entitled “Claudio Loses A Friend.” What a joke! I read this pathetic attempt by that Swiss Idiot to gain the affection of the ROH-bots, and blame me for all his shortcomings as of late. What a whiny little bitch Claudio turned out to be, huh? All I read was crap like “I thought Chris would have the same loyalty to me that I had for him”, and “I was manipulated.” Does Claudio take you all for morons or what? He was the man who came up with the plan for the CZW invasion, and now he’s making like I’m the anti-Christ or something. You’d figure that the guy who cares more about money than anyone this side of Ted DiBiase would understand that this is a business, and that my dropping him and teaming with Larry Sweeney was just business, and nothing personal. But no, like the idiot that he is, he goes and makes it a “Chris Hero stabbed me in the back” situation. What a little crybaby. You know what? I think that should be his new ring nickname, “Crybaby” Claudio Castagnoli. He should come out to the ring in a diaper and have a bottle in his mouth and a rattle in the other. What a joke Claudio has become. He used to be great, but now, he’s nothing at all. Oh, how far the once mediocre have fallen. Maybe I’ll team with him occasionally on the lower Indy shows, but for now, in ROH, I cannot and will not associate myself with that pathetic excuse for a pro wrestler. Get out your pacifier and your security blanket Claudio, and act like the baby that you are.

Next on the agenda is my old friend Ari. So, I’ve been told by my inside sources at 411 (you know who you are) that this week’s edition is the 2 year anniversary of the Column Of Honor. Now, you all know that I couldn’t let this opportunity fall by the wayside and not drop you a “thank you note”, if you will, so here goes. In all honesty, thanks a lot, Ari, for giving me a platform for my feelings on the state of ROH and the entire wrestling world. It showed a lot of guts to allow a “loose cannon” such as myself to get a chance to express himself in print on a weekly basis, and for that I offer you my deepest thanks. On the other hand, I want to tell you that I still think you’re a sniveling weasel who has absolutely no life, and really does need to get out of the house more often. See, its okay for someone like me to talk about wrestling all the time because I do it for a living. You on the other hand wouldn’t know a wristlock from a wristwatch. It’s just sad, having to interact with someone like you on a weekly basis, but it is necessary these days, considering the fact that I do actually own the column, and just let you be the lead reporter. Don’t forget our entire body of legal agreements, buddy. You can be replaced at any time, and trust me, I have a few people in mind to fill your seat when the time is right. By the way, does Stu Carapola have any more time to do another column, because if he does, I think I might have to give him a call and see if he wants to take your job, but that’s a story for another day. So, congrats on the anniversary, Ari. At least the column is well written. But otherwise, we all know why the people read it, and that’s because of yours truly.

Before I get going, I just want to touch on the ROH Japan shows that are taking place this week. While I am disappointed that I’m not there, I’m glad that ROH is going global, as it will in time afford me more moneymaking opportunities. I’m also rooting hard for “Godzilla” to defend his belt successfully, so that when he does come back to the states, I’ll be ready and waiting to take that belt right off his portly waist. Even if Nigel wins it, I’ll be more than glad to hand him another savage beating and take it from him. Now that I have my entire team together with Larry, Tank, Patrick, er, Bobby Dempsey and Matt Sydal, the sky is the limit. I’ve been spending some extra time with Matt lately, working on adding some new high-flying maneuvers into my arsenal, and so far, the results are awesome. I’ve even working on a special top rope version of the cravate. It’s going to be great. Oh, by the way, I’ve been getting a ton of emails and letters about my signature hold lately, asking why I don’t do it that often anymore. Well, my Hero-ites, rest easy because the cravate will be in full effect when ROH returns to the states in a few weeks. Maybe, if you’re lucky I’ll even throw in a variation or two for you hardcore “cravatists” out there.

And on that note, I will take my leave for another week, but don’t worry, I’ll be back next weekend with my take on the Japan shows, as well as my inevitable win in tonight’s Peterson Cup. All kidding aside, congrats to Ari on the anniversary of the column. You do a moderately decent job each and every week, and I applaud you and your dedication to the sport that I love, and loves me back, if you know what I’m talking about *cha-ching*!! Keep up the good work, monkey-boy. So, as I always say, this has been your weekly dose of enlightenment; this has been your Hero’s Sandwich. Sayonara, suckers!

Thanks Chris…your heartfelt words really touch me…like the part about calling me a weasel…yeah…

Honorarium

–The Battle of St. Paul: I was very pleasantly surprised at how well this show turned out—it’s another one of those first shows on a double shot just as good as the second one. The crowd was way up and energetic, as opposed to the last show run in the St. Paul area back in August of 2006. A deaf person could have heard a pin drop at that one. This time, however, the fans were lively, raucous and into the action. It was a ton of good action, from the Ultimate Endurance match to the No DQ Street Fight between Cabana & Homicide against Brent Albright & Homicide (which had an incredible pacing to it which saw the good guys dominate and then slowly lose the advantage until the heels had the last half of the match, and then a “surprise” finish), to the ROH World Title match which played incredibly well upon past history and gave Austin Aries another opportunity to show how we can go in a main event situation. His adopted hometown for wrestling training was behind him all the way, and the pop for his Joebuster combo was up there with the original Final Battle 2004 match.

Hell, even the FIP title match on this show between Christopher Daniels and champion Roderick Strong was a really good encounter, focusing on technical and chain wrestling. FIP title matches have been disappointments on ROH shows because there isn’t a realistic chance these days of Strong losing a title from Florida in another area besides that state. Yet this time around, Strong and Daniels had a competitive match with a very good ending, one similar to the Nigel McGuinness Pure title defenses. I would definitely recommend you check out this match if you had thoughts of skipping out on it—well worth your time and attention.

In addition, it’s awesome to finally see Mike Quackenbush on an ROH DVD. The crowd pops massively for him and he responds with a masterful performance. Quack is just one hundred percent capable of controlling his body movements and using it to run circles around an opponent. I also have to give credit to Jigsaw, who really hung in there with his trainer as a tag partner and until his injury late in the match helped to string the match together.

This DVD also saw the beginning of the ROH students as something more than just “student wrestlers”. For a long time, these guys were just learning the ropes, but now slowly but surely these guys have begun to find characters for themselves. Mitch Franklin has become the “clueless” guy, while Rhett Titus has found a wonderfully hysterical gimmick as the “Sexiest man alive”. At the next show, Bobby Dempsey gets taken under the wing of trainer and “Superior Natural Athlete” Tank Toland, and live I’ve seen that gimmick work excellently well. Guess what? These characters work for each wrestler. While all of these guys are still young and have plenty to improve upon, these newfound character personalities and storyline directions finally are going to give these guys a genuine chance at getting over with the ROH fanbase.

The return of Jimmy Rave and that huge babyface reaction he received…? Wow. Just wow. Shame on you St. Paul…shame, shame.

A great running gag is Jimmy Jacobs’ series of promos that keep becoming interrupted. He tries to tell us what happened with him and Lacey, but everyone presumes he’s “done the deed” and want to offer their congratulations. Jacobs’ act of frustration and insulting responses to those he meets in these segments are funny and entertaining.

–Good Times, Great Memories: This is the show where Erick Stevens finally shows what he can do in an extended singles match. Of course it helps that he has Christopher Daniels, an able bodied veteran, out there to work with him. However, it’s a very good start for Stevens to showcase himself and I could see with his upcoming match with Chris Hero making a larger mark for himself in singles action.

Okay, I’m going to write this and some people are not going to like it…after all the hype and all the talk about how it was match of the year, I did not like The Briscoes vs. Murder City Machine Guns match. This is on one watch mind you, but for me, it just didn’t click. While I loved the awesome back and forth action of Briscoes vs. Sydal / Castagnoli at the Respect is Earned event, this match, with a similar build and context, did not have the same impact on me. Maybe it was not being there live to witness the match unfold, I don’t know for sure. To me, it seemed way too mechanical-like, “you do your move, then I do my move” and so on and so forth. Of course some of the moves were impressive, but was the whole greater that the sum of its parts or was this match just its parts? I think with the Respect is Earned match and a few other Briscoes matches that have gone over the top with pacing, everything clicked right and came together, but not on this one.

A few matches I really did like: Takeshi Morishima vs. SHINGO, which was one hell of a brawn vs. brawn match where these guys just pummeled each other until one man could not take anymore. I thought Romero vs. Aries was a great contest with well worked psychology and Strong vs. Evans is just a step below their previous match this year but still has some incredible moments. In particular I love Evans passion in these matches, which is clearly visible when he goes after Strong. His improvement inside the ring and with expressing character motivations is duly noted.

There are three important promos on this DVD, well worth going out of your way to watch again and again: the Jimmy Jacobs opening dramatic promo, Christopher Daniels’ “mock farewell” promo and then Colt Cabana’s touching farewell promo. Jacobs almost about tops himself from his “All Star Extravaganza III” promo as he details why he didn’t sleep with Lacey and why he despises the rest of the locker room. The way he takes off his bandages is a particularly effective emotional point. Jacobs has been promo king of ROH this year, and it’s good to see him getting the opportunity to continue having a presence on these shows despite his injury.

Now, what can I say about Christopher Daniels? His promo was a masterpiece, as it tied in years of history, a heel’s justification for believing he is right and a complete dogging on the fans for their hypocrisies (both real and false). Daniels not only came full circle with his character’s roots in ROH, but he did it in a way that brought himself more heat for a future (if ever) return and also put the attention back on Colt Cabana’s farewell and made that moment even that much more of a babyface experience. As for Colt, his humor is definitely already missed in ROH, as I don’t think anyone can quite replace the goofy antics and comic one liner he provided both in promos and in while wrestling in ring. He starts his promo here with a witty and self deprecating “I got nothing”, but he actually finds his way to a really good speech. I also really love that in ROH, the parents of the wrestlers are invited into the ring for a farewell. CM Punk’s parents and Colt Cabana’s parents were each allowed in the ring for the celebration and it makes those moments that much more heartfelt and genuine.

-I didn’t get to it a few weeks back, but you may have noticed that my predictions of matches that were not announced for the 6/23 Chicago show were all completely WRONG. This means I have blanked out now on ALL my predictions for matches involving PPV shows. Ladies and gentlemen, DO NOT take the following from me: Lotto numbers, height and weight guesstimates, directions to and from locations, dating advice, diner recommendations. I will not know these things or tell them to you correctly. Neither will I know which hand you are hiding something, or be able to predict what color will come next at a traffic light.

-I actually caught up with some movies over this past week, including finally watching Transformers (SPOILERS AHEAD!). I was an amazingly huge Transformers fan as a child, so of course this was a huge nostalgia trip for me personally and I guess for a ton of other people because it’s the number one movie out there and raked in a ton of dough. I do have to say though, that this isn’t just a nostalgia movie or just a comic book / toy movie, but it’s a really good movie. It actually surpassed my expectations as far as being entertaining. It has a really good humor to it that plays on the real world aspect of what if this actually happened? The reactions of Sam Witwicky and his parents of for instance, dealing with teenage issues among the world possibly facing Armageddon thanks to robots, is both clever and on point. Also, who would have thought that Bumblebee would be my favorite robot in the entire movie? As a kid, I thought he was totally lame on the cartoon (maybe it’s because he was a small VW bug in the old series, and by the way watch for the nice homage to that in the Used Car lot scene), but in this movie the scriptwriters really up his game. In particular I thought the scene where Sam was trying to drive Mikaela (Megan Fox) home were so awesome and on point. I was laughing out loud from the first moment that Bumblebee plays “Who’s gonna drive you home?” The musical selections were dead on in this scene from “Sexual healing” to “Baby Come Back.” George Sirois over at the Movies Zone NEEDS to do a Scene Anatomy on this one.

The one particular weak moment about the movie was the way Megatron’s return was inserted into the plot. If you think about it too hard, there are some serious logic gaps about it all (like how he goes back to being 100 percent at no time at all and that he AND the Cube managed to be in the same location) but if you don’t think about it too much, it is a fun ride. A bit cheesy in that way that many action movies are cheesy, but not as cheesy as it could have easily become…so hats off to Michael Bay for coming through when most doubted he could do another good action movie (there are plenty of Bay touches though, from dramatic, vaguely Irish orchestral music and his love of flares—think “The Rock”). The character actors like Anthony Anderson, John Tuturo and Josh Duhamel make themselves noticed. Jon Voight proves once again that he kicks ass in just about any movie. Shia LeBeouf does a great job as the human eyes through which we see the events. The robots kick ass, and oh…hmm…what else? Oh yes:

Yes, definitely a fox.

Sorry…that’s my sexist side coming out there, just a bit…doesn’t usually happen. Plus, my life’s history is actually full of crushes on females named Megan…but, let’s not get into that here. Now here’s my alcoholic side, which comes out even less often:

Honor Culture
As many of you may or may not realize, wrestling concepts seem to tie together interestingly to real world concepts. Many names of moves for instance, are allusions to peoples, places or things. Wrestlers might have nicknames or personalities that tie into other cool snippets of socity. ROH is no different. So on a regular basis, I will check in with a dose of the Honor Culture and show you where these lines between wrestling and the so called “real world” cross over. For example:

Culture Lesson 4: Colt 45 Goes Down Smooth

In ROH, a Colt 45 is a move performed by Colt Cabana. By bringing his opponents up over his shoulder via the Butterfly suplex position and then swiftly dropping down on his knees, Cabana creates a devastating blunt force trauma. The move usually affects the opponents upper back and shoulders, leaving said grappler prone and vulnerable for the three count.

Credit: Onlineworldofwrestling.com

In the Mainstream, a Colt 45 can refer to a caliber of firearm, but if we don’t want to talk weaponry, we could also be referring to a rather smooth malt beverage. Famous for originally being sold in 45 ounce packages, Colt 45 was introduced by National Bohemian and is now being brewed and distributed by Pabst Brewing Company (makers of Pabst Blue Ribbon, which in my admittedly limited drinking I’ve found has been the least tasteful beer to ever touch these lips). Colt 45 has always had a “smooth” marketing campaign…with the smoothest man himself, Billy Dee Williams, selling the product:

With its high alcohol content, low cost, and smoooooth image, the Colt 45 has been served in many a tap around America.

Culture Connection: While Colt Cabana is the kind of guy you’d want to go for beers with after the show, you don’t want to be a part of his Colt 45. The beer = smooth; the landing after Colt takes you down from his shoulder and back = hard as heck.

The Briscoes Guide To Manning Up: Beach Edition

Credit:onlineworldofwrestling.com

Jay: Hello everyone out there in internet-land.
Mark: Woah brother, the internet has a land?
Jay: No Mark, it’s just an expression.
Mark: An expression? No man, I don’t drink coffee!
Jay: No Mark, that’s an Expresso!
Mark: OH! Okay then.
Jay: Well, today we’ve been told we should talk about Manning up on the beach
Mark: MAN UP! MAN UP! MAN UP!
Jay: NO MARK! Not yet. Hold up on that.
Mark: Oh. Sorry.
Jay: It’s okay brother. Anyway, here are some do’s and don’t about what to do and what not to do while you all are on the beach this summer. And what not.
Mark: MAN UP!
Jay: Okay, okay, hold on there Mark. First, before we do anything beach related, we need to consider the most important item.
Mark: A pail?
Jay: No Mark.
Mark: A shovel?
Jay: No Mark.
Mark: Well, then I’z stumped brother.
Jay: I’m talking about sunscreen. You need to protect yoself if yor goin to the beach. Lots of dangers sun and YOU-VEE rays are out there and those are dangerous to be exposed to.
Mark: Exposed? Jay…you ain’t talking bout one of dem dere nude beaches now aintchu?
Jay: No no no, Mark, you’re getting the wrong idear. I’m talking about protecting yourself from the sun so you don’t get cancer. What you fools out dere don’t believe in protecting yourself from dat? Think again. You better…tell em Mark!
Mark: MAN UP! MAN UP! MAN UP FROM THE SUN, SON!
Jay: That’s right Mark.
Mark: You know, you make a good point Jay. I always use sunblock before going on the beach. I put a hat on my head to block the sun. hehe…get it?
Jay: Yes yes, Mark I get it, but you know what, that’s not good enough. Do you use sun screen?
Mark: Surenuff. I got a visor too.
Jay: No I mean like that SPF stuff.
Mark: SP…wha?
Jay: Like when you look on the bottle of sunscreen it tells you the level of protection. Now look here, you’re bottle of sunscreen over here says SPF 5.
Mark: Yeah? So?
Jay: Well, dat’s not nearly good enough.
Mark: No?
Jay: Nope. Look, you know what you gotta do? You gotta tell that SPF to MAN UP!
Mark: YEAH! MAN UP! MAN UP!
Jay: SPF 15!
Mark: MAN UP!
Jay: SPF 23!
Mark: MAN UP!
Jay: SPF 30!
Mark: MAN UP!
Jay: SPF 45!
Mark: MAN UP!
Jay: SPF…um, what comes after 45?
Mark: MA…n…ummm, I dunnobrother, I can’t count that high.
Jay: Me neither. But that’s okay. You all out there get the point. So there’s another thing you need if you’re going to the beach and that’s sand.
Mark: Sand? We need sand?
Jay: That’s right.
Mark: But Jay, there’s sand on the beach already!
Jay: No brother, I know that. But what you need to understand is that our hometown, Sandy Fork, Delaware, is the leading exporter of sand anywhere in the world!
Mark: Export? Nah man forget that, I got Export 360 already! MAN UP export! You ain’t the 360!
Jay: No, Mark, that’s well… never mind. Just make sure when you all go out there to the beach that you’re using genu-wine Sandy Fork Delware sand. Get it from the Sandy Fork business district. Tell em the Briscoes sent you!
Mark: MAN UP sand!
Jay: Okay, what else you need for the beach is a towel. Make sure it’s not a goofy looking towel. Not one of dem ones with cartoon characters on it.
Mark: MAN UP BUGS BUNNY!
Jay: Right. Exactly
Mark: MAN UP DAFFY DUCK!
Jay: Yup.
Mark: MAN UP POKEMON!
Jay: Definitely.
Mark: MAN UP NARUTO!
Jay: Naru–who?
Mark: Don’t worry Jay, its one of them kids things. It’s crap. They need to MAN UP!
Jay: Okay Bro, I believe you. So you got your sunblock. You got your sand. You got your towel. Last thing you need is a..
Mark: Pail and shovel?
Jay: What is your obsession with pails and shovels Mark?
Mark: I dunno, Jay, I just like em.
Jay: Okay, you got your pail and shovel too. Last thing you need is to make sure you know how to swim. If you don’t I suggest you man up and buy one of these little flotation device thingies to put them on your arms.
Mark: Oh yeah, I used to use doze when I was a child! Then I MANNED UP! I don use em anymore.
Jay: Well what I’m saying is—if you should need to use these, don’t hesitate…safety first.
Mark: Right. Safety first, you little girls.
Jay: C’mon Mark, that’s not right.
Mark: What alls I’m saying is that they need to MAN UP!
Jay: Ah, hell, you’re right bro. They need to MAN UP!
Mark: MAN UP!
Jay:MAN UP!
Mark: MAN UP!
Jay: MAN UP!
Mark: MAN UP!
Jay: MAN UP!
Mark: MAN UP BEACH! THE BRISCOES IS COMING!
Jay: MAN UP!
Mark: MAN UP WAKEBOARD!
Jay: MAN UP!
Mark: MAN UP LIFEGUARDS!
Jay: MAN UP!
Mark: MAN UP GOOD LOOKING GIRLS!
Jay:MAN UP!
Mark: MAN UP!
Jay: MAN UP!
Mark: MAN UP!
Jay: MAN UP!
Mark: MAN UP!
Jay: MAN UP!
Mark: MAN UP!

…and so we leave The Briscoes to the fun in the sun of a nice long summer. Thanks guys for showing us the way to have a great time at the beach.

Going Home

Ringtones

Luke:wrote in about Danielson / Quack and BILLY CORGAN!

I also am excited about Bryan Danielson and Mike Quackenbush going at it in a Ring of Honor ring. However, it’s not their first-ever matchup. There is a match between the two from 2004 in IWA on the “Lightning” Mike Quackenbush DVD Collection Volume 2 set.

In a completely unrelated note, Nattie Neidhart is mentioned in the liner notes of the new Smashing Pumpkins album. I know Billy Corgan is a wrestling fan, but that’s hardcore.

Quick story related to Billy Corgan–I was actually at the ECW show at Hammerstein (the tag tournament I believe) where Corgan appeared live, playing a guitar and accompanying Steve Corino into the ring! Corino was a face at the time and this actually got a massive pop. I guess Corgan is indeed a hardcore wrestling fan.

**The Independent Buy In**
Support independent pro wrestling, ROH or non ROH, I don’t care. But if you out there are spending so much time complaining about how WWE sucks, then dammit, spend some money so you won’t have to spend so much time complaining. This list stays in the column and will be added to as the year goes on. Remember: don’t bow out, BUY IN!

2007

**PWG Battle of Los Angeles 2006: Night One (Strong / Romero, CIMA / Cross, Deliirous / Generico, 8 Man Tag)
**SHIMMER Women’s Athletes Volume 6 (MsChif / Melissa Last Woman Standing, Rebecca Knox / Allison Danger Pure Rules)
**PWG Hollywood Globetrotters (Super Dragon and Davey Richards vs. Roderick Strong and Jack Evans; Cape Fear (El Generico and Quicksilver) vs. Arrogance (Chris Bosh and Scott Lost); B-Boy vs. Frankie Kazarian; Alex Shelley vs. Chris Sabin.)
**PWG Beyond The Thunderdome (Super Dragon and Davey Richards vs. AJ Styles and Chris Daniels); Cape Fear vs. Arrogance; Joey Ryan vs. Chris Sabin)
**PWG Enchantment Under The Sea (Cape Fear vs. Briscoes; Matt Sydal vs. B-Boy; Super Dragon and Davey Richards vs. Arrogance; Austin Aries vs. Kevin Steen)
**wXw World Lightweight Tournament 2006 (Ares / Baron von Hagen, Pac / El Generico, Quackenbush / Roudin, 5 Way Tournament Match)
**ECWA Super 8 Tournament 2001 (Danielson / Low Ki, Danielson / Reckless Youth, Low Ki / Billy Fives, Danielson / Spanky)
**ROH FWA IPW:UK Frontiers of Honor 2 (Sydal / Richards, Cabana / Burridge, JC Thunder / Nigel McGuinness, Danielson / Brookside / Stone)
**PWG Battle of Los Angeles 2006: Night Two (Necro Butcher/Super Dragon, Hero/Horiguchi, Evans/Castagnolli)
**PWG Battle of Los Angeles 2006: Night Three (Generico / CIMA, Hero, Claudio, Necro, Romero / Cabana, Quicksilver, M-Dogg 20, Delirious, Generico / Sabin, Richards / Strong, Evans/ Horiguchi, Richards / CIMA)
**Chikara The Crushing Weight of Mainstream Ignorance (Quackenbush / Akuma, Steel / Steel, Sweeney / Kingston, Hair vs. Mask: Jigsaw / Icarus)
**Chikara King of Trios Night One (Order of the Neo Solar Temple / Los Ice Creams, Miyawaki, Yago & KUDO / Iron Saints, Sweeny, Eliis and Ryder vs. Neo Solar Temple POSEDOWN, Shima Xion / Nobutaka Moribe)
**SHIMMER Volume 7 (Daizee Haze/Cheerleader Melissa, Mercedes Martinez/LuFisto, Sara Del Rey/Nattie Neidhart)
**Chikara King of Trios Night Two (Sabin, Shelley and Dutt vs. Quackenbush, Jigsaw and Shane Storm / Hallowicked, Cheech and Cloudy vs. Lince Dorado, Pantera and Sicodelico Jr. / Olsen Twins vs. Miyagi and Yago / Quack T-Shirt Squad vs. Boyer and 2.0)
**Chikara King of Trios Night Three (Pantera, Lince Dorado & Sicodelico, Jr. vs. Mike Quackenbush, Jigsaw & Shane Storm / Kings Of Wrestling vs. Kudo, Yoshiaki Yago & Miyawaki / Mike Quackenbush, Jigsaw & Shane Storm vs. Kudo, Yoshiaki Yago & Miyawaki / Ricochet vs. Claudio Castagnoli / Daizee Haze vs. Sara Del Ray / Mokujin Ken vs. Mecha Mummy / Matt Sydal vs. Hallowicked)
**UWA Hardcore: Hour of the Dragon (Ultimo Dragon / Black Tiger, Chris Sabin / Josh Prohibition, Mike Quackenbush / Claudio Castagnoli, Tyler Black / Josh Ambercrombie)
**Fight Sports Midwest: Chapter One (Samoa Joe / Eddie Kingston, Larry Sweeney / Bryan Alvarez, Josh Ambercrombie / Austin Aries, Hydra / “Old Timer” Jeff King) **Fight Sports Midwest: Chapter Two (Alex Shelley / Low Ki, Mike Quackenbush / Tiger Mask IV, Human Tornado / Josh Ambercrombie)
**CHIKARA: Rey De Voladores (Chris Hero / Claudio Castagnoli, Chuck Taylor / Lince Dorado, Cheech & Cloudy / F.I.S.T. (Gran Akuma & Icarus), Chuck Taylor / Ricochet / Pac / Retail Dragon)
**SHIMMER Women’s Athletes Volume 8 (Sara Del Rey / Mercedes Martinez, Daizee Haze / Tiana Ringer, Nattie Neidhart / Portuguese Princess Ariel, Allison Danger / Lufisto) (NEW ADDITION)

This may be in my mind one of the weaker SHIMMER shows. Brad Garoon seemed to like it, but I don’t know, aside from the main event a few mid card matches, it didn’t carry the same quality and entertainment value as other editions. That said there are four matches you should definitely check out, and that alone is enough for a recommendation and addition to the list. Especially when in the main event you’ve got Del Rey and Martinez going balls to the wall (I’m aware of the irony of that phrase, yes) and just lambasting each other with shot after shot. These girls create a terrific match that has the crowd going “oooh and ahh” after what I’m sure has been hours of DVD tapings. The finish in particular is amazing to watch as Del Rey gets tossed around like a ragdoll (after dominating most of the middle of the match) and Mercedes rallies.

The Minnesota Home Wrecking Crew vs. Cheerleader Melissa and MsChif—very sloppy and messy in parts, threatening to fall apart at the end. I don’t know I’m surprised in a negative way and disappointed by the effort of these four.

Danger and Lufisto had an intense strong style match. I was real impressed with Danger’s effort in this one, although, like with Brad’s review of this match I agree that she shouldn’t preach about acting like a peachy clean babyface and then acting like a heel within a match. I do think these two pushed each other within the match very well and it’s a shame Lufisto is partially retired, because she definitely has the talent.

Other matches that impressed me were Neidhart / Ariel, where Nattie shows a ton of personality and charisma (and her crowd reactions are commendable). She’s also involved in one of the funniest referee spots: as she runs into the ref’s arms to save her from Ariel the ref drops her like a sack of potatoes. She spends some of the rest of the match giving him hell for that one. Haze and Ringer do a good job of infusing Lucha style into their match, and Ringer has become very solid in the ring. She just needs a more clearly defined heel persona and she’s right there. I’m also continually impressed with Amber O’Neal. She needs to work on hitting the in the ring moves cleaner, but she’s got the Valley Girl / Barbie Doll act down pat and it’s a great heel heat getter. She’s fun to watch and I’m shocked WWE hasn’t picked her up for at least a developmental deal given she’s good looking, thin and plays the right “Diva” character type for their division.

The ROH List
**Fifth Year Festival: NYC (Samoa Joe / Morishima, Homicide / Rave, Briscoes / Cabana & McGuinness, Albright / Whitmer, Evans / SHINGO / Xavier / Jacobs)
**Fifth Year Festival: Philly (Homicide / Morishima, Sydal & Daniels / SHINGO & Evans, Briscoes / Generico & Steen, Castagnoli / Aries, McGuinness / Perkins)
**Fifth Year Festival: Chicago (Morishima & McGuinness / Joe & Homicide, Cabana / Jacobs, Strong & Richards / Aries & Cross, Daniels & Sydal / The Briscoes, Albright / Castagnoli)
**Fifth Year Festival: Liverpool (Joe / McGuinness, ROH World Tag Team Titles: The Briscoes / Doi & SHINGO / FIP Title: Strong / PAC, 2/3 Falls: Delirious / Matt Sydal) **Fifth Year Festival: Finale (Joe / Homicide, Fight Without Honor: McGuinness / Rave, ROH World Tag Team Titles: Doi & SHINGO / Richards and Strong, Sydal / PAC, Falls Count Anywhere: Whitmer / Jacobs)
**All Star Extravaganza III (ROH vs. Dragon Gate 8 Man Tag, Strong / Evans, Mochizuki / Richards, Cabana / Sydal / Hero / Pearce, Homicide / Daniels)
**Supercard of Honor II (CIMA, SHINGO and Yokosuka / Dragon Kid / Saito / Mochikzuki, Strong / Aries, Whitmer / Jacobs, Evans & Doi / Richards and Romero, McGuinness / Hero, Daniels & Sydal / Delirious & Jay Briscoe)
**Fighting Spirit (ROH World Title: McGuinness / Morishima, Jay Briscoe and Erick Stevens Mark Briscoe / El Generico & Kevin Steen, Evans & Delirious / Strong & Romero, Claudio / Romero, Cabana / Williams)
**The Battle of St. Paul (ROH World Title: Morishima / Aries, FIP Title: Strong / Daniels, Delirious / Stevens / Romero / Evans, Albright & Pearce / Homicide & Cabana/ ROH World Tag Titles Ultimate Endurance)

This section needs your help! If you want to recommend some good independent wrestling to your fellow internet readers out there, drop me a line for the column.

ROH @ 411 This Week

Samuel Berman writes the Independent Mid Card and Reyes vs. SHINGO Also check out Sam’s review of the new Sara Bareilles CD…if he didn’t write up that glowing review, I would have gotten to it.

J.D. Dunn gets to present day and marches through 2007 DVDs with his review of Fifth Year Festival:Philly and Fifth Year Festival: Dayton.

Sam and Matt Adamson go toe for toe in a massive ROH debate in this week’s Buy or Sell

Matt Short gives you the first week’s worth of NTV Cup coverage in his The Navigation Log. His new column should be up tomorrow, hopefully with full results of the second week.

Jordan Linkous talks about why he loves the Indies.

Honor Bound Links

Nick Marsico has for you the News to Start Your Weekend, while John Meehan has for you News to Continue Your Weekend.

Self plug here for my participation in this week’s Fact or Ficiton, with me up against JT.

Alex Mattis looks at the best of the rest of the independent wrestling world.

411 Roundtable on TNA Victory Road.

The Ripple Effect gives you the Xmas in July half year awards.

Yokozuuuuuuna! gets the write up by Stu Carapola.

Larry C with the 4R’s.

Halden thinks people who believe Kane will win the title are idiots.

Weyer gives us War Games.

Bayani Domingo goes job hunting in this week’s Truth B Told (and maybe I’ll join him).

Ask 411 something or other…maybe you’ll get an answer…

That will cover it for this week and the second anniversary column—hope you all enjoyed it! Thanks for reading and I’ll see you back next week for fallout from Japan, Race to the Top Tournament coverage and much more.

I’m Ari Berenstein, and I’m loving life!
–Ari–