The Custom Made News Report 08.26.07

Welcome, one and all, to the Custom Made News Report. As always, I’m Ryan, and I’m here to guide you through the wonderful world of professional wrestling. Despite the fact that one of WWE’s biggest shows of the year is happening tonight, this has been a slow news week in all honesty. However, I still think that I’ve managed to drum up some interesting tidbits that have yet to be covered in depth on our fair website, so let’s get right to them.

Dusty Rhodes Looking to Step Down

According to F4WOnline, Dusty Rhodes is looking to scale back his role in WWE. For those not familiar with the situation, the American Dream has been a part of the company’s creative team for quite some time now, predominantly working on the Smackdown show and also recently taking the reigns of ECW. Rhodes, age 61, is apparently growing tired of the hectic WWE travel schedule, which currently keeps him on the road five to six days a week. Frankly, at his age, I can’t blame him. Another reason cited for Rhodes’ desired departure is the Raw debut of his son Cody. Though Big Dust was obviously willing to help jumpstart his son’s career through the Randy Orton feud, nowadays the elder Rhodes is worried about accusations of favoritism harming Cody’s career. The position that Dream is lobbying for would see him used in more of an advisory capacity in which he could still oversee aspects of WWE programming without necessarily having to be present at every show.

Dusty Rhodes

I’ve got mixed feelings on this one. On one hand, I can certainly understand Rhodes’ desire to spend more time at home during this point of his career, particularly given that he does have grandchildren. Plus, I find his desire not to hinder his son’s current career rather noble, as is philosophy about wanting to have the boy succeed or fail based on his own merits, even though it does seem like a bit of a 180 given the influence that he had over Dustin’s early success in WCW. Perhaps he learned a lesson there, as Dustin was only really able to break through as a star when he was in a promotion not overseen by his father. Despite all of this, I would love to see Rhodes stay on the road for purely selfish reasons. Though I’m sure guys like Michael Hayes also have a lot to do with the current direction of Smackdown, the show has been pretty damn solid all year long. The current creative team gave us a great Batista/Undertaker feud, and, though a lot of people complain about Khali as champion, you can’t deny that they’ve booked him about as well as possible given his limitations (particularly with his recent adoption of the claw hold, a move virtually impossible to screw up). On top of that, even though I don’t tune in to the program that much, many individuals who watch ECW on a regular basis have been giving it a huge thumbs up due in large part to the old school booking. I guess my thoughts on the matter boil down to this: I don’t want to see Rhodes leave as a fan, but I want to see him do what’s best for himself as a man.

End Near for Hogan?

Florida-based television station Bay News 9 ran an article about Hulk Hogan and his family recently. Though the primary focus of the article was the Hogan clan returning to their home in Belleair, Florida (which was featured in the first two seasons of Hogan Knows Best), there was also speculation from “Nasty” Nick Hogan that one aspect of his famous father’s career may be coming to an end. Though nothing is yet set in stone, the youngest member of the family stated that their reality series may be coming to an end, with an eight-episode long fifth season potentially being the curtain call. I don’t watch Hogan Knows Best regularly, but I have caught a couple of recent episodes, and I fail to see the series’ appeal. I’m not about to blast it for being staged as some folks do, because that would be quite hypocritical coming from a man who devotes far more of his free time than is healthy to professional wrestling. However, the “storylines” featured on the program are so hackneyed and the acting so laughable that I’m hard pressed to see how the program retains viewers. Of course, the deal seems to have made the Hulkster and his brood a good chunk of change and is one of the highest rated cable programs in the United Kingdom after its recent debut there, so I’m sure that if he ever became aware of my criticisms, Hulk will just take them and laugh all the way to the bank. (As he should.)

BROCK~!

Brock Lesnar is negotiating with UFC. John Meehan covered the story in depth in his news report yesterday and there have not been significant developments in the last twenty-four hours, so I’m not going to spend too much time on this one. However, I will add a couple of small details that have been released by F4WOnline. Apparently if Lesnar does come in to the company, his debut would be at some point in December, and his first match would not be against the UFC Heavyweight Champion (currently Randy Coutre thanks to a victory last night that I’m told defies all logic) but rather against another opponent. For those of you who think that pro wrestling and MMA have absolutely no connection, you need look no further than the interviews that Brock has been doing about coming to UFC to see that MMA in large part relies on old school wrestling angles in order to gain much of its success. The man is going out of his way to play an arrogant heel, pure and simple. If he ever fights in the Octagon, the battle will make millions of dollars, and it won’t be because a brilliant, technically sound match is guarnateed. It will be because MMA fans, despite the fact that several of them thing that they’re “above” pro wrestling, are actually easier to work than old school ‘rasslin fans and are currently buying Brock’s schtick hook, line and sinker.

Rock Plays with Dolls

Here’s an interesting note to come off of the PR Newswire. Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson, in addition to being a football player, professional wrestler, and actor, is now apparently getting involved with a line of dolls, albeit a bit indirectly. The Rock’s ex-wife (or soon to be ex-wife, I can’t recall if the divorce has gone through yet) Dany Garcia-Johnson recently became the first outside investor in a company known as Baby Abuelita Productions, Inc. The company is based out of Tampa, Florida, and focuses on marketing a line of four dolls that sing traditional Spanish folksongs when their hands are pressed. The purpose of the company, according to a line on its official website is to “preserve Hispanic heritage for every generation” because “[a]s more Hispanic-American children are born in the United States, these Hispanic-American children are losing a part of their heritage since these songs are not being taught.” Though the Johnsons reportedly chose to end their marriage a few months back, the split was amicable, and the two remain friends and business partners. Thus, even though the Rock has not directly made the investment in the line, there are hopes within the company that his ties to Dani and connections within the entertainment industry will allow the brand to develop new products, including a potential series of direct-to-DVD films.

Though I’m certainly not a business analyst, this seems like a great move for all parties involved. Obviously taking on an outside investor provides the company itself with tremendous opportunities for growth. Furthermore, the Latino demographic is rapidly growing within the United States, as is that demographic’s level of disposable income. Even if that disposable income wasn’t growing, children’s toys are often the one “non-necessity” that folks will shell out their hard earned money to get. Thus, it seems that virtually any investor would be smart to get in on the ground floor of a project like this. Besides, even though I believe that this country’s inhabitants do need to maintain a strong national identity, part of that identity should be an appreciation and understanding of our differing backgrounds, and I’m all for a product that prevents those backgrounds from being wiped out by market-induced homogeneity.

Nora’s New Grove

The Forest Lake Times of Forest Lake, Minnesota, ran a story on Nora “Molly Holly” Greenwald on August 22. There wasn’t much to the story, but it did talk about Greenwald’s current occupation. Nora is now working with the Minnesota Teen Challenge, a program which runs twelve month and sixty day rehab programs for young people with drug or alcohol problems. The program focuses heavily on Christian teachings and uses Jesus Christ as a path to recovery. In the article, Greenwald, who by all reports is a devout Christian herself, stated that she got involved with the program because she has had many friends and co-workers die due to drug related issues. Combine that with Mark Henry’s recent comments to the Austin, Texas-based American Statesman about not wanting to travel with other members of the WWE roster for fear of being pulled over in a vehicle containing illegal drugs, and I’m beginning to wonder how some individuals can continue to argue that there are no drug issues in professional wrestling.

Two Hours

TNA is almost there. Really, they are. Serious this time. When it’s officially announced, all of their problems will be magically solved. Yup. No more problems in TNA whatsoever once they have a second hour of television.

Tomko & Albert Return to New Japan

Recently on TNA Impact, Travis Tomko has been shown roaming the hallways with a mystery championship belt. Though it’s rarely mentioned, that belt is one half of the IWGP Tag Team Championship, which of course means that Tomko is one half of the top tag team in New Japan Pro Wrestling. (It should be noted that, while Kurt Angle has a phony version of New Japan’s IWGP Heavyweight Title, Tomko’s is the real deal.) His championship partner is Giant Bernard, formerly known in the United States as Price Albert and A-Train. The two have held the belts since March of this year, when they defeated Manabu Nakanishi and Takao Omori.

It was announced that, in September, the two men will be making their return to the company after having primarily been in the United States for the last several weeks. Beginning on September 7, they will be part of a tour that sees them wrestling at least once every two days, primarily in six man tag team action with a rotating series of partners that includes Irish juniorheavyweight Fergal Devitt, Dragon Gym trainee Milano Collection AT, and former sumo star Akebono. The tour will conclude on September 24 in Hiroshima, with Albert and Tomko defending their titles against IWGP Champion Yuji Nagata and Manabu Nakanishi in the show’s main event. Not surprisingly, the champs’ opponents in the six man tags leading up to this event typically include Nagata, Nakanishi, or both.

It has not been made clear how (if it all) TNA plans on explaining Tomko’s absence. He will definitely not be available for the September 9 No Surrender pay per view, as he is scheduled to wrestle in Japan on that day. If TNA continues their regular biweekly television taping schedule, he will also most likely miss all Impact episodes taped in September, though he could return in time for the first October taping.

Summer Adventure Tag League to Conclude

Yes, Dragon Gate’s staggering month-long tag team tournament is finally set to wrap up tonight. As has been documented in this column, three teams have been running nose-to-nose throughout the tournament: Taku Iwasa & Keni’chiro Arai, Ryo Saito & Susumu Yokosuka, and Naruki Doi & Masato Yoshino. These three teams, alongside the duo of Shingo Takagi and Cyber Kong (who rallied and had an impressive streak at the end of the tournament), wound up in a four-way tie, with each earning fourteen points. To determine the winner, tonight’s DG show will feature these units going at it in a single elimination mini-tournament. Also on the card will be a match for bragging rights between the two teams who had the lowest tournament scores, with Super Shisa and his protege Shisa Boy taking on Genki Horiguchi and GAMMA.

Dudley Debut in CZDub

Last week, it was announced that Spike Dudley (a.k.a. Brother Runt, a.k.a. Matt Hyson) was released by TNA alongside several other pieces of talent. This week, it was announced that Dudley will be making his debut for the Philadelphia-based Combat Zone Wrestling on Saturday, September 8, 2007 in the building formerly known as the ECW Arena. Though his opponent has not yet been named, one can only imagine what Spike, who has a reputation for putting his body on the line in his matches, will do in CZW, a promotion that is infamous for its “ultraviolent” style, including use of barbed wire, light tubes, and weedwackers.

Spike Dudley

Dudley, a former schoolteacher, began his wrestling training at the school of California’s All Pro Wrestling. While there, filmmaker Barry Blaustein discovered the youngster and planned on including him as a character in the famed wrestling documentary Beyond the Mat, using Spike (at that point wrestling under his real name) to chronicle the story of a rookie wrestler who had not yet been picked up by one of the Big Three promotions. However, before Blaustein could finish filming the movie, Hyson was approached by Paul Heyman and ECW about joining the promotion. With Dudley moving on to one of the big leagues, Blaustein instead used California indy wrestlers Tony Jones and Mike Modest in the role originally intended for Spike. Though Hyson missed out on a major role in the movie, his decision to head to ECW resulted in him having a rather successful professional wrestling career. He was almost immediately given the “Little” Spike Dudley (LSD, get it?) gimmick as a part of the Dudley Boys faction, which at the time was more of a comedic sideshow act than the serious tag team in to which it would evolve. After repeatedly tagging with his supposed half-brothers, the runt of the litter broke away and became a cult hero as an underdog babyface, feuding with brothers Bubba and D-Von over the ECW Tag Team Titles, which resulted in Spike’s two reigns with Balls Mahoney. He was also dubbed “The Giant Killer” after a series of matches in which Spike defeated many of the larger men on the ECW roster and also several individuals who were brought in to the company seemingly for the sole purpose of getting the 150 pounder another impressive victory.

When ECW folded in 2001, Spike was almost immediately picked up by World Wrestling Entertainment. He had perhaps his most memorable WWE angle in May and June of that year, as he and Molly Holly were paired as star-crossed lovers in the middle of a feud between the Dudleys and the Holly Cousins. His love for Molly, combined with the fact that he refused to join the WCW-ECW Alliance, lead to a series of matches pitting Spike and a random partner against Bubba and D-Von. Though it was largely a retread of a feud that had already taken place in ECW, the rivalry provided WWE with several strong undercard matches throughout the summer of 2001. After losing Molly to Shane “Hurricane” Helms, Dudley received another minor push as Tazz. The two were portrayed as underdogs who managed to put together an impressive winning streak, which ultimately lead to a brief Tag Team Title reign. Despite upsetting William Regal for the European Title in 2002, Spike’s career remained largely in limbo until July 2004, when he won the Cruiserweight Title from Rey Misterio as part of an angle in which Spike turned heel and was revealed as the “boss” of his brothers Bubba and D-Von. Though a heel Dudley unit with Spike as the leader was a novel concept that could have breathed some new life in to the team, WWE failed to capitalize on the angle’s potential, with Spike’s title reign being largely ignored until he lost the belt to perpetual jobber Shoichi Funaki in December 2004. In 2005, Spike’s last moment in the limelight saw him assist his brothers in winning their match at the first One Night Stand, though all three Dudleys would be released from the company less than a month later. This resulted in a completely forgettable run for Spike in TNA wrestling, where he was renamed Brother Runt and never used in any meaningful way.

American Gladiators?

This isn’t a wrestling story in the strictest sense of the term, but Variety is reporting that NBC-Universal wants to relaunch hit syndicated television show American Gladiators and update it a bit for 2007 audiences. A posting has been made on the NBC website stating that casting is ongoing for the program, and I’m interested in this story primarily because I wouldn’t be surprised to see a few familiar names popping up in discussions for the cast. For those of you who don’t remember the original television series, American Gladiators was a game show in which contestants took on a regular cast of “gladiators” in athletic competitions. The original gladiators primarily had bodybuilding backgrounds and were renowned for their impressive physiques, which is why I would be polishing up my resume and sending it in to NBC-Universal if I were a recently released WWE competitor in my physical prime. Guys with the bodies necessary to be Gladiators are hard to find, and guys with the bodies necessary to be Gladiators AND extensive television experience are even harder to find, making former wrestlers prime candidates. That’s why I think men like the recently fired Tough Enough Alumni Daniel Rodimer and Nick Mitchell would be fine choices for a show like this. Hey, their former Tough Enough opponent Justice Smith was a character on the American Gladiators knockoff Battle Dome, so it’s not outside the realm of possibilities. (Speaking off, does anybody else remember the feud that Battle Dome had with WCW? Now that was some wretched stuff.)

I’m also glad that the casting isn’t being handled by Johnny Ace. If it were, he’d probably hire the wrong Larry Csonka for the announce team, leaving 411’s wrestling zone without one of its editors.

Here are a couple of small updates to stories that I have discussed in previous editions of the report:

~ Early last month, I talked about Thoruf Marius, a young wrestler from the midwest who got the opportunity of a lifetime when he received the chance to train in Pro Wrestling NOAH’s dojo. Thoruf has been tourning with NOAH all month, and I’m glad to announce that he received his first singles victory in Japan on Thursday, defeating 2005 dojo graduate Tsutomu Hirayanagi.

~ On Wednesday, Chris Sabin was victorious in the first of two singles matches on his current tour with All Japan Pro Wrestling. Tonight, he receives his shot at All Japan’s Juniorheavyweight Title.

~ Quick results from the Ballpark Brawl indy show that we previewed last week: Jake O’ Reilly won a Royal Rumble featuring a bunch of local wrestlers and Sirelda of TNA infamy; Cody Deaner & Krystal Banks def. Cody 45 & Sara Del Ray in a mixed tag; Xtremeo def. Kevin Dunn; Matt Cross def. Ruckus; Brutus Beefcake def. Cody Deaner & Johnny Puma in a hair match (Puma was shaved); Sterling James Keenan def. Pac, El Generico, John McChesney, Trent Acid, & Xtremo in a six-way match; Claudio Castagnoli def. Delirious by decision in a European Rules match; Ricky Reyes & Steve Corino def. Big Cat Lemmer & Brodie Lee and Detox & Devon Moore in a tag team table match; Gail Kim & Kelly Coutre def. Sara Del Ray & Traci Brooks; 2 Cold Scorpio def. Joey Matthews (Mercury) to retain the Pro Wrestling Unplugged Title; Sterling James Keenan def. Samoa Joe & Rikishi in a three-way to win the Natural Heavyweight Title

We’ve just got one notable reader e-mail this week, coming from Thomas W.. He’s not responding to me so much as he is a reader who wrote in last week:

Kevin S. in your last column commented on John Cena’s acting abilities and wrestling abilities. I’m going to go out on a limb and say that Kevin S. has no acting experience or wrestling experience trying to comment here. I’ve spent the past two years of my life studying theatre and acting, and I also happen to be a pro-wrestler. Sure, I’m Joe Indy who will probably never make a blip on the radar, but that’s probably more than Kevin. John Cena, while not the best actor in the world, is a decent actor. He is a believable character and is always “in the moment”, which is key to promos. As far as his in-ring skills, or more specifically, his ring-psychology, I’m pretty sure Kevin is still just on the Cena-sucks bandwagon, because I doubt he’s actually paid attention to the little things in the match. If you notice when an opponent is working an arm, be it a hammer lock, armbar, etc, they are working the left arm. John Cena, and pretty much any wrestler, delivers clotheslines, shoulderblock, fist drops, and the like using their right arm. Granted, Cena is still not the best wrestler in the world, he’s no Bret Hart, but at least he’s looking better doing the STFU, not screaming his head off and actually looks like he’s trying to keep the move held in. Oh, one more thing, Scotty 2 Hotty for next TNA Champion!

The left arm/right arm point that Thomas raises is certainly a good one that I hadn’t thought of. On the whole, though, I think that he and I can both agree that anybody who says John Cena is not a good professional wrestler has no clue what professional wrestling is actually about. Some people aren’t satisfied with matches unless they contain five thousand flips and moves all strung together at a breakneck pace. However, ever since it was first created, professional wrestling has been far more simple than that. It’s all about getting the crowd behind you, which can be done just as easily with punches and chops as it can with the springboard 360 huricanrana. I think those folks who bash Cena heavily have forgotten what pro wrestling is supposed to be.

And thus concludes another installment of the Custom Made News Report. If you want to wrap your weekend up with more reading about professional wrestling, I suggest checking out:

~ The Fink’s Payload, which features the end of my three week run as a guest author.

~ Fact or Fiction, which this week saw Ryan Mancuso and myself talking a lot about TNA with a little bit of Summerslam thrown in for good measure.

~ The Impact Crater, which I actually didn’t write this week. Nick Marsico stepped up, as I was unavailable to watch the show. To thank Nick for filling in, go read something from his archives or listen to him on Rocketbusta Radio.

With any luck, we shall meet again in seven days.